I was going to start a "Avoiding Dresden Cliches" thread for the purpose of helping myself mostly as I'm fairly new to the universe having just recently finished the latest book. But then the more I thought about it the more I was equating the thread to the "Potter Law's."

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=8086&highlight=Potter+Law

So, can we help the writers out there that want to populate the Dresden threads and avoid cliches, bad plots, crappy characterizations, overused ideas, etc.? In other words, what are the cliches for Dresden and how do we avoid them?

I'm sure there are a number of Potter Laws that can be directly pulled over here with a couple of name changes so that might be a decent place to start.

Such as:

I.
If you think you have an excellent and original idea for Dresden, step back and meditate.​

II.
The Staff and Blasting Rod are tools capable of bringing either chaos or order to any situation. A weapon of powerful magnitude, they are the signature of any Wizard – a symbol, if you will. See if you can’t have Dresden spend more than five minutes creating a new one when the old one breaks.​

III.​

Harry Dresden is not gay. He has been shown in the books to enjoy the attention of a woman. Let's keep it that way.

Ex:Johnny Marcone and Harry Dresden have no love interest in each other, both are straight and love women. They won’t suddenly start to eat each other’s faces and have hot sex somewhere. No, they won’t.

IV.
Faeries are mostly manipulative (the powerful ones anyway) and don’t fall in love with any mortal because of some cooked up act of generosity/love/mercy/etc.
Power and Knowledge is something else entirely.​

Important: They don’t
(No love stuck, dump Maeve/ Mab /Titania /Lea and not even Lily)​

V.
Harry Dresden may had an abusive childhood (physical and psychological) with Justin DuMorne, but up until now it is a fact that he wasn’t raped by Justin and didn’t get some obscure comfort from Bob!​

Addendum: Having Human-sized Bats toss your salad, with their vampire tongues, in Grave Peril doesn't count, and should promptly be forgotten. ​

VI.​

Dresden is powerful as shit for his age but is not all powerful and does not go from being powerful and crude to being OMG hes kicking the Merlin's ass in less than a century.

VII.​

Dresden has to cry and angst once every 100,000 words. Because he's the dark sensitive type. Just once/100,000 words otherwise its too much.

VIII.​

One thing about writing Dresden is to remember that magic is difficult and takes effort. So I guess in before magic talisman teaching Dresden uber magic stories : not gonna happen.

IX.​

There shall be no fan-girlish stories wherein Harry and Elaine never split up. In fact there will be no fan-girlish stories whatsoever. Dresden is a wuss around girls enough without making him a pansy.








Feel free to add to your heart's content and I will edit them to this post.

 

First off, excellent thread idea. Once Dresden fanfiction really starts heating up, I hope that we will be able to control some of the retardedness that has gripped the HP fandom.

Let's start things off with a little bit of anti-homosexuality.

III.​

Harry Dresden is not gay. He has been shown in the books to enjoy the attention of a woman. Let's keep it that way.

 

For the safety of the future Dresden Files forum

IV.

​

Faeries are mostly manipulative (the powerful ones anyway) and don’t fall in love with any mortal because of some cooked up act of generosity/love/mercy/etc.
Power and Knowledge is something else entirely.

Important: They don’t
(No love stuck, dump Maeve/ Mab /Titania /Lea and not even Lily)


V.

Harry Dresden may had an abusive childhood (physical and psychological) with Justin DuMorne, but up until now it is a fact that he wasn’t raped and didn’t get some obscure comfort from Bob!

(Better save than sorry with these slashers out there, you never now what the cook up next…)


VI.

Johnny Marcone and Harry Dresden have not love interest in each other, both are straight and love women. They won’t suddenly start to eat each other’s faces and have hot sex somewhere. No, they won’t.​

 

You cockmanglers fail at laying down the law. Try to be a bit more harsh, eh?

 

Cockmanglers? I have never mangled a cock before in my life ... bent one in half and heard it pop, yes, but that wasn't my fault... there were circumstances...

Anyway, instead of pissing on it how about suggesting something.

 

There will be no fan-girlish storys whearin Harry and Elaine never split up.

 

VII.
Dresden is powerful as shit for his age but is not all powerful and does not go from being powerful and crude to being OMG hes kicking the Merlin's ass in less than a century.

 

Well if the spirit is to avoid cliches I can't say there are many out there. There are quite a few slash pairing favorites, Michael and Harry seem to be up there.

Other than that I guess both Shezza and I have done Potter has a coin shtick in crossovers.

I'll try to think of some good ones.

One thing about writing Dresden is to remember that magic is difficult and takes effort. So I guess in before magic talisman teaching Dresden uber magic stories : not gonna happen.

oh and second, Dresden has to cry and angst once every 100,000 words. Because he's the dark sensitive type. Just once/100,000 words otherwise its too much.

 

Just to put a downer on number 5, Harry was raped by the vampires in Grave Peril... Or at least that's how it reads, as it's never explicitly said. Doesn't effect the Bob love thing but I needed to point that out.

 

Too expand on that, he was tongue raped...which is pretty awful, Having human sized bats toss your salad.

 

Harry Dresden WAS Raped By Bianca. In bat form. GET THE FUCK OVER IT PEOPLE.

So. Tell me. HOWS THAT HARRY/BIANCA GOING FOR YOU NOW, FAGS?! U LIEK UR BATRAPE?!

 

Suggestions for more Laws

How about this -

X

​

The only slash pairing allowed in DF will be Murphy/Molly
(Somebody start working on a fic or one-shot with this pairing.
*looks hopefully at Vash and Nuhuh*).

XI

No fucktard shall introduce Hermione and Ginny to Dresden Files through a crossover.
EDIT - unless they have a very minor role in the fic.

XII

Thou shall not write The Merlin's character based on Dumbledore, The Merlin is a manipulative prick and beyond redemption.

XIII

Harry/Lash stories will never get old. There will always be demand for MOAR.
​

EDIT - No. XIII is my favourite pairing. I know it won't be a law.

​

​

 

Femslash has always been excluded from the slash hate.

 

XIV​

Just because Dresden has the magical strength to do the powerful rituals and spells does not mean he has the control to properly do them without mental or physical preparation.​

How about we reword this one a bit.

XII
The Merlin hates Harry Dresden for numerous reasons, many of which have yet to be fully explained, and will continue to do his best to get Dresden executed, unless the situation requires him to remain alive.​

 

XV

Kincaid is not a bad guy. Neither is he a good guy. He is the second baddest son of a bitch to walk the earth. He is a mercenary who doesn't think its glorious. Kincaid is a killer who does what it takes to do the job. He does what he is paid to do and not a bit more or less.

Kincaid is second to Chuck Norris.

 

...the fuck?

 

That sentence doesn't even begin to make sense.

Fix it. Now.

 

Mister is a very large cat of dubious breed. He is not a fae/demon/Outsider/scion/etc. in disguise.

Addition to Law III: Harry engaging in homosexual relations with his brother Thomas is a lie. Harry told this to a policewoman to throw her off his tracks. It was later turned into a running joke, bit still does not contain a shred of truth.

Vampires of the Red Court resemble rubbery, greasy overgrown bats. Vampires of the Black Court are literaly walking corpses. They are literally nightmarish monsters and as such will not engage in romance with mortals and/or each other. (Humans being raped by said vampires, while disgusting, is acceptable.)

Little Chicago is a very cool magical toy and a convient plot device. Use it.

That's all I've got for now.

 

Alright, WTF... Apparently I've lost the ability to edit the damn post so unless a mod wants to add the newer laws or bestow some magical ability for me to edit said post it'll just have to be a running thing.

 

You can only edit your post within a time limit. What is it 12 hours or something?

Anyway, once we have a good number we can collect them in one post or can edit your opening post to put them in. For now people are still coming up with ideas.

So just keep hitting "Reply" with laws.