Well a friend and I were talking about fanfiction, then we looked at the Harry Potter Rap, and wondered what it would be like if Hogwarts was full of drug addicts. Perhaps it could be a parallel universe humour fic.

We thought Dumbles would just be an old rasta, dreads, fawkes lighting his spliffs, uses a huge spliff for a wand, office is full of drug paraphanalia, his office passwords are different strains of weed, he offers you a spliff instead of sherbet lemons, etc.

Snape would just be a hippy, tripping on LSD constantly and whipping up strong chemicals in his "potions" lab.

Sprout just refines weed strains in her "greenhouses", and grows a fair few poppys as well.

The Hospital Wing always seems to prescribe medicinal cannabis

The Basilisk attacks were actually students going cold turkey and becoming catatonic

I think it'd make a decent oneshot. My friend's idea was to have Dumbledore the rasta be smoking a large spliff at the start-of-term feast (hash brownies, of course) and just have Fudge walk in and have Dumbledore start yelling about the law and not wanting to do time before legging it.

This was just a set of ideas I wanted your views on

EDIT: Dementors as KKK? White pointed hoods? Hagrid as the guy who busts Dumbles out of jail? Voldemort as a heavy meth user whose face melted?

 

Refine those ideas! And when (or if) you start writing the 1st version, send me a copy...

 

I don't know if you've seen it, but there's actually a really god fic about Harry as a drug addict. Written by Rajun'Cajun, or however his name is spelled.

It's more of a serious story though. I'll try to find it and post a link.

Edit: Here. http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=9902&highlight=Cajun

 

you should give the drugs magical effects though. Maybe the magical version of LSD actually gives you DreamVision where everything is a vibrant shade of the rainbow or weed literally makes you high as in float of the ground high.

 

Dumbledore, the magical hippy?
Hagrid, the drug dealer?
Filtch, doesn't have enough money to score some weed?

FAIL. Come on, you can do better than this.

 

I lol'd. A nice parody take on the whole world of drugs (mine went a more serious route) that could be done well. I'm pretty sure I've read a few of these, but they all seem to bew written by mentally disabled 12 year olds who took a drag of a cigarette and think they know all there is to know about drugs.

As long as you have some experience in it (which I assume you would) it could be done well. A total crap out on the magical world. I like the Dementors and Voldemort idea, make Dementors racist pricks who only suck the soul out of pure bloods or something.

We were talking about this on IRC a couple of days ago actually. You could do a whole bunch of cool little scenes with it. The 3rd years and the Boggart. Harry looking in the Mirror of Erised with Quirrel. Going through the 3rd task while on acid.

Caution: Epic lulz approaching.

 

Umm... LSD accomplishes that stuff just fine on its own, no magic require

 

lol, fine. magical LSD makes everything you touch rainbow-y.

 

Thing is, I don't think I could do this concept justice like some of the more experianced writers at DLP could. I might have a go, but I'm working atm and there isn't much time for me to sit down and write beyond brainstorming ideas such as this.

I reckon a properly fleshed out parallel world could end up with an epic humour story. A parody of "Harry goes to a parallel universe and kills their voldemort" XD

 

The original Harry won't kill Voldemort "make love, not war" kind of guy...

I'm afraid of what might come out of this thread.

 

Perhaps Voldemort could be a rival drug baron, producing a hip new Death Eater drug which is more potent than the Order's.

 

As much as I hate any form of glorifcation of drugs, it might prove to be a hilarious fic. Stil, it'd be a delicate balance to maintain if you'd want ME to enjoy the fic. xD

 

Magical LSD is canon; they calls it Felix Felicis.

Anyways, absurd idea is absurd.

 

I think this would work best as making the entire magical world just one big drug-induced illusion, rather than having it as people within a real magical world taking drugs.

For example, Hagrid coming to tell Harry that he is a wizard and taking him to Hogwarts is a metaphor for Harry's descent into drugs at a very young age due to the treatment of the Dursleys.

One way of doing it could be to tell everything once from Harry's point of view - as if the magical world is real, and then once from a omniscient narrator point of view. So, you have Harry seeing Hogwarts for the first time and being amazed at it's beauty. Then you have a third person version of the same events, only now we really see that Hogwarts is actually a dark spot behind some filthy public toilets.

Or something.

Hmm... I just made this idea much more serious.

 

James and Lily getting killed because of DUI?

I still think is ridiculous.

 

Or pull a St. Elsewhere (though with drugs instead of autism) where the big twist at the end is that everything has been a drug induced hallucination, leaving only vague hints along the way, and Harry is currently in hospital suffering from an overdose. Adds a bit of reality at the end of it, but lets you have all sorts of fun along the way.

 

This is why you shouldn't post stoned. Although, if I were to write such a story, the DH horcrux hunt would be headquartered out of a VW Microbus.