Wildlife? The students will get Warming Charm practice because it's fucking freezing?

Fuck if I know.

Also, these.

 

Dear god! Juggler actually made a funny! And one semi related no less!

Related note, Harry would know his Alphabet from A to Zed.

 

Thats how your supposed to pronouce it.
You americans are just lazy

Lord Z concurs with me.

 

Less tax.

And instead of Quidditch they can play magic hockey.

 

I have taken the liberty of doing your siblings homework for them:

* * *

Hogwarts should relocate to Canada for the following reasons; first, in Canada, seal fucking is not only legal -- but also a national past time; second, it's all aboot the exchange rate -- the Canadian dollar is weak against European currencies; third, Canadians are a simple people who don't masturbate with sandpaper the way Scottish people do. The last one tends to make them happier also. As a result of a multitude of seals to rape, a weak currency, and a less ornery population with an accent that normal people can understand, it is imperative that Hogwarts move to Canada.

Some might argue against moving to Canada by saying that masturbating with sandpaper leaves the Scottish people with cleaner genitals with less dead skin. This is a lie. It, in fact, leaves the Scottish people with mutilated and poorly functioning genitals. This is why they are always upset, and also incapable of speaking in an intelligible way. Others might argue that sex with seals is not all that it is cracked up to be. These utterers of grave falsehoods should be killed lest their opinion spread. Seal pussy (or anus, if that's your thing), is incredibly soft and somewhat slippery. It is like being wrapped in a slimy latex glove with the air conditioning on in the middle of winter. The cold, however, in this case, only heightens the glorious sensations. The last group of liars will say that the Canadian dollar is getting stronger. This is true, however the only reason that this would matter is if Hogwarts took too long to get its shit together in moving.

In conclusion, with plenty of seals to rape, a weak currency, and a population that does not masturbate with sandpaper, Canada is the ideal destination to which Hogwarts should re-locate. From what I hear, Canada's wolves make good lovers too.

c'est finis

 

Gio wins at life.

 

Seals are gentle and beutiful lovers, I encourage you all to court one.
And our un sandpapered gentalia leaves us suitably capable of pleasing our aquatic BBW lovers.

Lets not forget our butchered french is the tongue of the Gods. Je mappelle Quazi, et Gubbaty Gobbity GA! Mon petite cherrie...

 

Why should Hogwarts relocate to Canada?

So the Canadians finally have something to be proud of.

 

Supposedly, it's Jersey.

Oddly enough, I concur. THANK you.

Knowing the Mounties, Harry'd taze a nigger, and the nigger'd die.

:awesome

You're an idiot.

News to me.

...you're just a furfag, impressing your desires on us because you know your nation can't (and won't for a while) even get gays right.

We're proud of not having you around.
-----------

In summation, Hogwarts should stay where it fucking is and this "teacher" should be shot, covered in A-1, and dragged into the forests.

 

I should think so!

I am my own country's greatest shame.

 

No, your country's greatest shame is losing a huge fucking empire.

You... nobody likes you.

 

Wasn't there an episode of the Replacements... nevermind.

At least Canadians and Americans can agree that Britain can fuck itself. Now if they'd just get rid of the Queen of Canada [eyeroll].

 

Upside: Universal health care.

Downside: Canada.

 

Harry would murder Voldemort with a tazer. The power he knows not, eh?

 

Fixed that for you.

 

It's either Harry, Ron, Hermione or Neville's knee in Voldemort's neck would be what killed him.

And the Polaks would baawwww.

 

At least we HAD a huge fucking empire. Peasant.

 

I love how nearly everyone is approaching this like its a high school or university level essay. Lol, it's merely like a one paragraph beginners essay for a 6th grader who's probably just learning how to write.

It seems ridiculously to us, be to 6th graders it's a brilliant way to catch attention and get the assignment done.

 

That makes it no less retarded.

 

They're 6th graders. From New Jersey. Why would Jersey kids know why a school should move to Canada?