Sorry for not posting my review earlier, but I see I missed a lot. I want to say that, firstly, while the idea of giving a magical hat to a kid is a bit of a stretch, Jbern does to a pretty good job of explaining why and how he got it in my opinion.

Secondly, on the Fleur/Harry thing, I'm honestly not sure who I'm rooting for. She is the "top prize" for HJ and he seems to have real feelings for her (not just wanting to hit it and quit it) but at the same time her chilly demeanor is getting tiresome. I think HJ should maybe try and get her jealous with someone else, like he did with Aimee. That, or use his lunch slot (He has to buy her lunch right? Or did Krum win?) to schmooze her.

Finally, I thought the chapter overall was ok, but a bit hyped up for the quality recieved. Don't get me wrong, the medical drama and the witty banter was good, but something was missing... and the way he beat the dragon was disappointing, though very humorous. Hopefully next chapter we will see some more wizarding politics and some relationship building.

Cheers.

 

I admit, I was secretly hoping that Harry would walk up and punch out the Chinese Fireball, bare-knuckle style. Then he would spit out a witty one-liner, then sweep Fleur off her feet and ride off into the sunset.

What a disappointment.

 

The whole lung swapping seems weird, If they slice open the chest to swap. Shouldn't the lungs collapse?

I did love the off key comment.

 

With the switching spell, the effect seems to be instantaneous, so there's no leakage, no reason why the lung would collapse.

 

Actually, cutting both chests open makes sense - Aimee's lung was collapsed, Harry's would be at various pressures depending on what part of a breath he was taking. They'd need to equalize the pressures of the two lungs, possibly, and the only easy way to do that would be to make them both equal the outside pressure, thus cut open the side. The previous rationalization assumes, of course, that both lungs need to be at the same pressure.

 

No. If the pressures on the two lungs equal outside pressure, it's a pneumothorax and the lung collapses. You need negative pressures on the lungs to keep them attached to the pleura.

This was possibly the most pointless thing I've ever typed on the internet, btw.

 

True, but I was saying that since Aimee's has already been collapsed, then Harry's would also be collapsed so they would be the same. But then, they would both have pneumothoraces, so I guess I have no idea why their chests needed to be cut open.

 

Aimee's lungs weren't collapsed, but the air sacs in them had been damaged to the point where they were no longer transferring enough oxygen to her bloodstream. She was still breathing, but nothing was happening.

The reason for the open chest procedure is that they needed to see what they were switching.

I'm about 3000 words into the next chapter. It's looking like TML 11 isn't coming to me, so I'll leapfrog that and do Lie 18 first.

 

Ah, I was wondering if having to see the target was the reason. Looking forward to the next installment of Lie, jbern.

 

You've just given us Lie fans a nice Christmas gift.

 

Excellent news Jim.

 

It hath been updated. Going off to read now.

 

The worst part about the cliffhanger is that I don't think we'll find out who it was that got the elixir until the sequel. I did enjoy the interaction between Harry and Aimee.

 

In terms of the person Neville has become, his caretaker being a cold woman who seems to regard Neville with barely constrained contempt, I would say that HJ makes the decision to bring back Alice.

I would also expect the reveal for who the potion was used on next chapter. I assume the link the sequel would be that the Longbottoms harbored some sort of secret that Voldemort didn't want getting out.

Well done on the chapter.

 

Nicholas Flamel as a jackass who regards himself as better than the rest of humanity because he made a big shiny ruby that produces a fluid that gives eternal life and will turn any substance into gold. What a jackass.

P.S. I loved this Flamel.

Overall an excellent chapter one thing I noticed was when describing the lake you said merpeople chasing James, Peter, and Sirius back to the surface was Lupid left out intentionally?

I say he brings back Frank because as much as he would love having Neville meet his mother, HJ is also a practical person when need be and knows Frank will likely be needed in the future.

 

Given the reason they were down there was to find out whether or not merwomen have pubic hair, I doubt Lupin was immature enough to come.

 

Awesome update. Fleur seems a lot more palatable in this chapter and I liked how HJ seemed to realize he was acting a bit too much like James in his chasing of her. I also enjoyed his conversation with Dumbledore. The conversation with Aimee was very entertaining as well, especially at the end. Well, actually I really liked all of this chapter just in general. Great job.

 

My money's on Alice because Frank is way too obvious. All the references in the chapter were to how bringing Frank back would make more sense. It's a TRAP!

The only thing this fic needs is more twin-bashing. They really do tread a fine line between "pranks" and "bullying" and it's interesting to see how infantile they are when they don't like someone.

Fleur was a bit improved this chapter too. She doesn't seem like she'd be quite as terrible of a girlfriend as she has for most of the fic.

 

Interesting take on the Longbottoms' long-term importance, but I'd say the real reason for this sub-plot is just what JBern stated - HJ has to make a difficult decision.

As for Augusta Longbottom, I never got the sense in canon that she held contempt for Neville, rather that she was emotionally distant from Neville because of the pain of what happened to Frank and Alice, as well as simply not knowing how to deal with a young boy after however many years. Still, she definitely doesn't treat Neville *well* until after OotP, so who knows?

If I were in HJ's shoes, I'd be leaning ever-so-slightly toward Alice, as Harry-not-HJ had the most loveless home-life imaginable, and Neville would likely get the most nurturing from Alice. Then again, with Neville growing up (remember him in canon fourth year?) now, maybe Frank-the-strong-father-figure would be more helpful to Neville at his present age.

Oddly, I was initially surprised that HJ and Dumbledore *didn't* give Neville the final say, but in hindsight, that would've been exceptionally cruel.

I have to say, as far as cliff-hangers go, this one was completely unexpected.

Second that! I happen to really like Aimee, especially in light of the witty banter between Aimee and HJ at the Yule Ball. I hope you all noticed that when Lady Flamel asked HJ about Aimee, he said there was no romance "at the moment". JBern has the story listed as Harry/Fleur, so there's really no reason to think it won't eventually get there, and I for one am just happy to be along for the ride, although I will admit I prefer Aimee to Fleur here.

Just look at Bungle and TML; they're listed as Harry/Luna, but at this point in TML, Luna is sort of a basket-case (or at least too immature for Harry) and Harry is better off without her. That said, nobody but JBern knows what arc their relationship will take over the rest of the story.

JBern - another very good chapter. You've written several times that you have problems with grammar and that's true to an extent. No fanfic I've ever read was perfect, no matter who the beta happened to be, so don't beat yourself up. You gave us all a nice New Year's gift and I couldn't be happier.

And the best part? the bit about there being a SEQUEL to Lie! Any idea on the number of chapters to go in Lie? How about some news on the status of Deadeye? Will that be available in Kindle format?