Title: Fair Trade
Author: BajaB
Rating: K
Genre: General
DLP Category: General
Pairing: None
Status: One shot

Summary: AU one-shot set after sixth year. Harry confronts Voldemort with an alternate reason for some of the Dark's Lord's failures, and offers to help him out, for a price.

Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4818951/1/

A character study of sorts: How Tom Riddle went from a genius student to, well, Voldemort. It also explores some of the other effects Horcruxes might have.
Canon compliant, mostly, until the end of Book 6.
It certainly makes some interesting points about Voldemort's state of mind.

 

I cannot imagine a better story comprised entirely of dialogue.

 

That was actually really good. I'll give a more in depth review later, I'm tired.

3.5/5

 

QFT.

I really like most of BajaB's works and as usual, this one doesn't disappoint.

4/5 solely because there is no epilogue.

 

All this story did for me was highlight how piss-poor JK Rowling is at writing a competent enemy. I found myself getting irritated at how incompetent Voldemort was being portrayed, before I reminded myself that BajaB was writing in accordance to canon.

Well written, but it felt like I was reading an article out of a textbook. Too bad there will be no final on Harry Potter: Plots and Their Holes.

3/5

 

I thought the fic was good, if little more than a well-written expression of why we all hate canon and a new character. It's hard to pinpoint what exactly is wrong with the fic but I too find myself slightly annoyed with it, maybe it's Harry's condescending, superior attitude and Voldemort's total insanity (something I've lost touch having not touched canon in so long). Perhaps that was the reason, it reminds me of canon.

Still it's solid and if you like reading about why JK Rowling's plot was so full of holes, then this fic is perfect for you.

3/5

 

It was not really bad but a bit boring.
Far from worthy of the library.

2,5/5

 

Meh-worthy. Too much like some shit that DisobedienceWriter would do. 2/5

 

^^^^^^^^^ this, its just not as good as his other works.

 

Well, this was a pretty, shiny load of bullshit gift-wrapped in golden paper with little red ribbons. This is not genius. There are a couple of ingenious ideas, but the author spends most of his time bluffing.

The writing, or at least the little description there is, isn't great. The one-shot (nearly) opens with the following line: "Harry’s voice echoed in the empty void hollowly."

Empty void hollowly? Holy Mother of All Redundancies.

The rest is mostly dialogue, and it serves its purpose well. No comment.

Then -- the content. Again, as I said, a few clever ideas; on the whole though, JKR's so-called plot-holes are exposed by Harry with a confidence that tries to mask the dumbness of his alternate explanations.

First off, did you say canon-compliant?

All those who go all "Yeah I remember those were dumb plans, JKR's villain is so dumb!" really need to reread the books. I don't remember much about Snape's Occlumency lessons -- did he report to Voldemort after them? Did he even tell Voldemort he was giving Harry lessons? I have absolutely no memory of it, which makes me think BajaB extrapolates; he's entirely entitled to do that, but then it's called "fanfiction", not "denouncing a plot-hole". If I'm wrong though, feel free to correct me.

I'm 95% certain, however, that Voldemort never intended Malfoy to succeed. So the second wasn't "another of his brilliant manoeuvres" suddenly becoming oh so dumb; it was Malfoy trying not to get his parents killed. Period.

The rest consists in demonstrating Voldemort's insanity. Generally speaking, I don't think BajaB's interpretations of his actions are any more probable than JKR's. No genius, but an interesting concept.

Some of them, though...

Two examples. First: the prophecy.

No. The prophecy says "one must die of the hand of the other." Harry murders or is murdered. Voldemort chose to accomplish that prophecy at his advantage, making him the murderer and not the victim, and he decided to do it with a minimum risk: when Harry wouldn't be able to defend himself.

Bleep, wrong answer, try again!

Agaaaaaain, learn to read. "One must die at the hand of the other." It had to be him.

Wtf? If he didn't kill him, he would one day be killed by him. That's the whole point of the prophecy.

That's precisely why he chose to kill him as a baby. He wanted to eliminate the potential threat before it had the time to be anything else than "potential." He didn't believe a baby could kill him. He believed a grown Harry might. Quod Erat Demonstrandum.

Second: the Triwizard Tournament.

...Riiight. So stupid Dumbledore, or any of us readers, never suspected it until the very end. I'm sceptical here, but let's wait for the explanation.

Yeah, you mean after he was discovered as a traitor and murderer, he should've just strolled in as a rat and given Harry a Portkey. Because Dumbledore totally wasn't prepared for that.

Did you say 'stupid plan'?

Oh wait, did you say 'plot hole'?

Rereading canon becomes urgent. He's getting OotP and GoF mixed up. For GoF, he couldn't Polyjuice himself as he had a barely functional body. And he needed to cross wands with Harry -- if only to prove definitively that Harry wasn't his equal. It would've worked perfectly without the Priori Incantatem, breaking forever the dangerous legend according to which a 14 year old boy was his equal; and no one but Ollivander and Dumbledore could've foreseen the Priori Incantatem.

Now for OotP, I doubt he could've Polyjuiced himself, either... There must be shields against tricks so basic in the DoM. As there are in Gringotts.

Those two extracts are good examples of the general hypocrisy of the piece: those who say it's better than JKR's ideas are probably influenced by their disgust at HBP and DH, both of which are barely mentioned in this fic. Because otherwise, I frankly don't get their reactions.

The icing on the cake:

Die. Just die. That's not Harry Potter. At this level of OOCness, the fic becomes ridiculous. This Harry annoyed me all throughout the piece with his pedant, condescending, would-be sarcastic manners -- but that, which was supposed to be an emotion-filled glimpse in Harry's heart and mind... Gah.

Am I the only one to see the exasperating "conversion-like" aspect of this line? "Thank you, you were so absolutely right, I saw the light and the error of my ways!" All we need is the chorus of gospel music in the background. PRAAAAAAISED BE THE LOOOOOORD HAAAAAARRY...

Yeah, no.

2/5 because of the few interesting ideas. Too bad they're drowned in the surrounding bullshit.

 

I think that your two examples relating to the prophesy, Tinn, are on the assumption that in Voldemort doesn't know the full contents of the prophesy at that particular juncture in time. So, it makes Harry's responses a little more believable.

 

Forgot that. It makes Harry's second question more believable -- he could've sent other people do it.

Then, simple answer: he suspected it was the greatest threat to his power. Anyone would've decided to do it themselves, to be sure it's done well.

...Wait, where did the prophecy stop for Voldemort? If it's where I think it is, then he didn't know he would murder or be murdered; but even so, wanting to kill the threat before it becomes an actual threat still makes sense to anyone with a couple of functioning neurones.

...And it still wouldn't mean that Voldemort "believes the propecy is real but tries to stop it, paradox thar!" since the bit Voldemort heard only says "the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches". Compare that with "the one who will vanquish the Dark Lord approaches".

 

Tinn Tam, I agree with you about how the bit with the prophecy wasn't handled so well. It would have been preferable for Harry to berate him for not using something more failsafe--a sledgehammer to his skull, perhaps--instead of using magic, which seems to have a mind of its own, to do the deed. Or just strangulation--that way the prophecy would have been literally satisfied. Or, hell, just chop off baby Harry's hands first; without hands, it'd be difficult for Harry to kill him "by the hand of the other."

Is this tongue-in-cheek? Though it's been awhile since I read DH, I seem to recall a Polyjuice break-in into Bella's vault...

Harry's statement could have been lifted from essentially any Indy!Harry piece written over the last five years. Yes, it's OOC, but I hardly find it damning. This Harry is OOC. He's smug and self-assured. He's spent time conversing with Tom Riddle and has come to a different set of conclusions about the magical world than sacrificial-lamb!canon!Harry. We're not told how he made this off-screen transformation, but at least it's an internally consistent portrayal.

I thought the story was an interesting concept and, in the end, an entertaining read, provided one doesn't dig too deeply. It has a few faults and while not BajaB's best story, I don't think it's a "big ol' heaping pile of fail."

The main fault I see with the story is that Harry isn't very likable. I wasn't rooting for him like I usually do and I wouldn't have been that put off had he failed and lost. (Would a likable Harry really leave the world to Tom Riddle's eternal patronage?) Thinking about it now, I probably would have preferred if Harry lapsed into his canon persona after Tom absorbed Voldemort, that the whole smug, supercilious bit was an act designed to manipulate his foe. Negotiating more aggressively with Riddle in the end and reminding him of his vow not to become a tyrant would have been more satisfying all around.

 

Voldemort only knew up through the "as the seventh month dies" bit, and so his decision to kill baby!Harry before he becomes a threat is believable, except that he didn't know the whole prophecy, and therefore should have waited if he were thinking things through. But, that falls in line with Dumbledore's assessment of Riddle being arrogant, so...

As for the story, it was well-written, like all BajaB's work, but I didn't happen to like it nearly as well as every other piece I've read from him, and especially not as much as The Price of Knowledge, Relive, Dark Marauder and The Substitute, to name a few.

I think my issue with the story is the same as mentioned earlier, that Harry seems to discard everyone but those he cares about. Then again, that can all be explained away with Harry's "plan" that the mor complete Horcrux in himself will overpower what soul is left in Voldemort's resurrected body.

 

Just read this myself. Interesting idea.

A lot of what's contained within was similar to ideas I've expressed (and thought of) concerning my own work "Unlocked Knowledge".

The Horcrux in Harry overpowering the bit in Voldemort's body was actually one ending I thought of early on and discarded, but remains an interesting idea nonetheless.

4/5 in my book, since it was only a one-shot and didn't have the "spark" that many of his other works have.

 

Then you'd be guilty of OOCness (didn't intend to sound so melodramatic here, but I couldn't find a word other than 'guilty'...), because of the importance Voldemort gives to magic; he hates his Muggle roots so much he decided to forget them and support the anti-Muggleborn movement, and this despite evidence that Muggleborns can be as powerful as wizard-born wizards.

The point of this rambling paragraph being: Voldemort defines himself as a wizard before defining himself as a man. He will never use Muggle ways rather than magic -- and let's face it, the Killing Curse had never failed before. Strangulation and sledgehammers have failed in the past... although I'm not so sure about the hammers.

As a side note... Voldemort likes decorum. Not cliché-villain decorum, but still. A sledgehammer? Not classy.

...cancelled by a charm that also disrupted Ron's transfigured features and Harry's Imperius Curse. That was what I was referring to.

>_>

Well, in fact, that's my main problem with the Indy!Harry genre...

On the whole, the story isn't the "steaming pile of shit" that my first review might make it out to be. The writing is alright -- nothing special, but alright -- and as I said, there were interesting ideas. What I disliked was how the fic was presented: as a denunciation of JKR's plotholes, and a "finally logical" alternative solution. In fact, BajaB's best ideas were as likely as JKR's. They were a good twist on teenage Riddle's personality -- something I'm okay with, it's fanfiction after all. His worst ideas were ridiculous. It's bullshit, but not completely shit. If that makes sense.

 

Nice enough drabble, but still nothing spectacular. It was an enjoyable read and started with a fairly original premise. 3/5

 

I'd give it a three. Isn't his best work, but it was decent. I skipped some of it. I guess its Bin worthy.

 

BajaB is an excellent author, and a dialogue base story that I can actually read without getting irritated proves it. 3.5/5