Title: Diary of a Madman:Memoirs of a Nukenin
Author: Bloodraver Alpha
Fandom: Naruto
Rating: M
Genre: Adventure/Romance
Pairing: Itachi with a girl (probably Tayuya) and Naruto with a girl
Chapters: 32
Words: 83,584
Updated: May 26, 2012
Published: Feb 9, 2008
Status: Abandoned
Summary: Uchiha Itachi. Missing Nin, Akatsuki member, mass murderer. He has power, and a lot of it. But after an encounter with the Kyuubi Jinchuuriki, he begins to wonder what the point of it all is. What good is power if you've no good reason to use it?
Link: Fanfiction.net

The story starts off as Itachi-centric, but in later chapters the perspective of the story goes from Itachi to Naruto and Jiraya .

It`s a pretty good story 5/5


Checked February 14, 2015

 

To be honest, any story that involves Itachi not being emotionless and apathetic or talking in a deadpan voice put his OOC rating way over the top, so when shit like this comes up:


"Well, save for the Uzumaki brat. I have to say, I’ve never met a cheerier person than Uzumaki Naruto. Heavens help me, but I actually sort of like the little punk. It takes a lot of guts to face the hazards he does with a smile. And it’s infectious; it’s infuriatingly difficult to fight down a grin of my own even when I’m trying my damndest to capture the boy."

I'm like wat.

Still looks kinda decent so far, pretty hard to imagine Itachi with anyone; especially a female.

2/5

 

I like this.

Strike that. I really like this.

I'm 5 chapters in and this is kind of sucking me in. Loki, emotionless and apathetic only go so far in terms of character analysis and development. And just because Itachi is emotionless and apathetic on the outside doesn't mean he's that way on the inside.

Whether or not Itachi decimated the Uchiha Clan for the lulz or due to orders, that act is a defining moment in his history and character. If he could kill his heart to such an extent to do something like that, he can do anything.

And that's strangely liberating.

Itachi reflects on the fact that the shinobi life is shined up for the next generation to be glamourous and exciting when in fact it's ugly and full of death. What I liked best is the idea that shinobi saving princesses and having all sorts of adventures is said to be a lie sole to children, while Naruto kind of lives those adventures. Saving Princess Yuki, fighting Shukaku, being a demon host....

All in all, I like this. Having Itachi as kind of sarcastic burnt-out observer on this is kind of refreshing. Too many fanfics play him as a quiet psycho with zero character depth.

This just in: According to Itachi, Anko hid kunai in her genitals. She was able to fuck over some rapist trying to ravish her on a mission and killed him. Fucking win.

 

Silly of me to rate the entire fic on the first chapter, still he just seems ridiculously ooc, so I'll probrably skip this one or save it for a rainy day.

 

Look at this:

Orochimaru’s hands twisted, white-knuckled with irritation as Sasuke stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him in a childish fit of pique. He’d once planned to use the boy as his next and ultimate body, but he’d abandoned the idea within the first year of teaching the insufferable little brat. The Sharingan was something he still desired mightily, but he’d given it up as a hopeless ambition; he’d observed the kind of idiotic pride the users took in the doujutsu, and he’d been stricken with a sordid realization:

If he too obtained the Sharingan, then he would come to rely on it, and like the rest of the now-deceased clan, he’d grow weaker for it. At first, he’d been willing to suffer a little weakness in exchange for such a potent ability, but after careful observation and subtle conversations with the Uchiha boy, he’d learned, much to his chagrin, that the Sharingan was imperfect. He’d even go so far as to call it ‘irreparably and fundamentally flawed’.

Orochimaru prided himself on his skill with jutsu, not merely the quantity, but on knowing the ins and outs of his techniques better than most ninja knew themselves. In that respect, he and Itachi were unknowingly of like minds. He’d regarded the Uchiha bloodline as a tool to realize his ambitions, but to his immense anger and horror, had discovered it to be a hindrance.

The first time he had become uncomfortably aware of the possibility had been seven months after Sasuke had come to him. It had been during a spar where Sasuke had used several of the ninjutsu he had copied. But he’d used them poorly, and without any consideration of anything but their strengths.

Orochimaru had been surprised at the ineptitude his then-future body had shown, and had interrogated the boy afterwards as to the reason. What he’d learned had shattered all expectations beyond repair. Uchiha Sasuke, number one genius of his class, the Rookie of the Year, the brilliant last scion of the late, great clan…was an idiot.

Not an idiot in the traditional sense, of course; he was hardly a gibbering fool scratching his head at the insurmountable difficulties presented by a doorknob, but an idiot nonetheless. He didn’t understand the jutsu he copied, and didn’t care about understanding them. He was so fixated upon ‘power’ that he’d completely ignored everything else. He wasn’t concerned about, didn’t even think about anything but sheer, animalistic brute force. Lacking grace and elegance, he didn’t have the desire to excel, only to conquer.

Worst of all, Orochimaru discovered the true abilities of the boy’s doujutsu. The Sharingan didn’t allow him to break down the jutsu he stole; it was, at its very best, a tool for mimicking the actions of others. The Sharingan copied jutsu. And that was ALL it did. Uchiha didn’t have to understand the technique stolen; they didn’t even have to know how to use it – and most of them didn’t. It was a sobering realization for Orochimaru when he had determined that, rather than expand the limits of a ninja, the Sharingan instead became nothing more than a refined ‘monkey-see, monkey-do’ parlour trick.

Sasuke was physically very powerful, but completely lacked the ability to think in the abstract; everything was black and white, everything was linear. And this moron was supposed to be his ‘perfect body’?! The vaunted Uchiha bloodline that he had desired, lusted after, hungered for…was base mimicry? Nothing but a clan of well-trained monkeys!

Even after this depressing revelation, Orochimaru had still considered using him as a vessel for his soul. The problems of the doujutsu might not even have been insurmountable, if it weren’t for one key fly in the ointment:

When Orochimaru took over a body, his thought processes would be dominant, but still constrained by the limitations of the body he’d inhabited. In layman’s terms, if he possessed an idiot, he’d become an idiot. If Orochimaru possessed Sasuke Uchiha, he’d likely lose his ability to dissect and engineer jutsu! In a very personal sense, he would cease to be Orochimaru.

Unacceptable!

His teeth ground together in hopeless frustration. If only he’d been able to possess Uchiha Itachi! Now, there was a fine mind! Orochimaru detested his failure with the older Uchiha, but had laid his hopes on the younger, more malleable brother. Unfortunately, he had not counted on the reason for said malleability being softness in the head.

As it was, he was endeavouring, though without much success, to replace Kabuto with Sasuke. Kabuto, despite his sudden treachery and disappearance, had been a brilliant subordinate, and had been trained to perfection – a master of all graces, social or not, and a truly worthy successor to the Snake Sennin’s twisted legacy in all respects. Sasuke, though, was proving difficult. Orochimaru truly, honestly regretted having wasted five excellent ninja in his successful bid to spirit the boy away from Konoha. With time and much effort, Sasuke might become a well-trained, though headstrong weapon.

But he’d never be a tenth of the shinobi that Itachi was. The best Orochimaru could hope to do was to use him as much as possible before the arrogant little shit went to confront his brother and got himself killed.

 

So, Iruka is also apparently stronger than Tsunade. Never seen that done before.

 

I actually enjoyed the fic quite a lot, despite having a lot of reservations at first glance. My main complaints:

1) Iruka being some ubernin moonlighting as a schoolteacher. Dunno why a lot of authors try to make this loser into some kind of hidden badass, but I hate the idea. It's probably just because of the fact that Iruka is one of my least favorite characters in the series. I've never seen the device done quite to the ridiculous level that this story does, however. Umino Iruka being able to 'hopelessly outclass' the likes of the Sannin and Itachi? LOL. That's so fail that it's hilarious. There are some other logical issues I have with this as well, but I don't care to go much further into it.

2) Pain's brutal ragefest, carried to the point of almost literally beating a member of Akatsuki to death over a mistake (even though it was a major fuckup). Completely OOC. This is the guy who sat back, calm as a cucumber while Hidan raged at, cussed out and threatened to murder him in front of the entire group. Reminded me of Fanon Voldemort torturing the shit out of his Death Eaters in a random bout of rage. I can understand and approve of him using a certain amount of coercive force to maintain order over a group of cutthroat criminals like Akatsuki, but this particular episode was much, much too much over the line of reason.

Still, despite these things, it was a very enjoyable read and I hope to see more.

 

From the Bloodreaver Himself

Hah. Glad that most of you are enjoying the fic. *shrugs* I'm a bit of an oddity - I always look at established characters and ask myself "What was he/she/it thinking during this?" and "What is [their] true motivation?"

I'm fascinated by psychology and how people's actions can actually tell you far more about what they're thinking than their words ever could.

LT2000 - I believe I addressed why I chose Iruka as a secret Sannin-stomping-Shinobi (I love alliteration!) in one of the later chapters of the first arc, but I'll reiterate my statements, albeit highly summarised. He's underused, underdeveloped, and yet he is incredibly critical to Naruto's development. I'm well aware of the incongruity of his supposed 'uber-ness' when you stick his actions right next to Mizuki nearly killing him in the very first chapters, but, as they say, I am the Author. I am the God in this universe now, and quite frankly, I wanted to break the established character mould.

As for "Pain's brutal ragefest", as you *cough* delicately consider it, the exact reasons for it have not been made clear in my fic yet. Suffice to say that every man has his breaking point, and every man has a trigger which will make him a monster. Of course, the true reasons behind his OOC actions are hardly so blasé, but keep in mind that I myself am a thinker. Wheels within wheels within wheels, lads; you've only seen the outer rim of the first thus far.

Oh, and Loki?

Itachi is a heterosexual male. He's becoming unhinged, slowly, and he's losing his grip on the brutal training and indoctrination that made him so dispassionate and cold. It was revealed in canon that Itachi DID IN FACT have a girlfriend (and seeing as Sasuke himself said that Itachi killed her during the massacre, she was likely also an Uchiha), and thus he does have hormones. The iron rod of self-discipline, though, has become oxidized and weak, and everything he's suppressed, including his natural inclinations with regards to puberty and the like, are going to start bubbling to the surface.

I don't claim to write flawlessly, although one of my reviewers has certainly stated otherwise, and I'll eventually go back and fix the errata and mistakes that I do make.

But I want you all to keep this in mind: It is fanfiction. If some, most, or even all of you enjoy mucking about in the universe that I have shaped, than bully for you; have fun, don't drink and roof-hop, and be in bed before 2200.

But if there are those of you who turn your nose up at my breaking of established convention? Well, frankly, I could give a damn. There are plenty of other writers out there, many better than I. Perfect Lionheart, in fact, happens to be a writer to whom I shall never favourably measure up. Read his works, and leave me to lament my inferiority.

I don't mind criticism - it's just as important to know what you're doing wrong as well as what you're doing right, and it's certainly more helpful than the 'OMG update soon!' useless reviews that people sometimes give. I've done it before, but it certainly doesn't help the authors I gave them to, except for maybe giving them a jot more validation.

Bloodreaver Alpha OUT.

 

That douchebag who wrote the clusterfuck that is Chunin Exam Day? Seriously?

 

Chunin Day Exam isn't meant to be taken seriously, its just a random comedy to the power of 1000. I am not sure if its even going to have an ending.

Still the part where Naruto gets Sasuke's fangirls to undress for him was epic.

 

But... it's not even funny.

 

It has its moments, during the last 20 chapters it gets pretty annoying but the start where you have him in the stadium with all his female kage bunshins cheering on Gaara to squish Sasuke had to be worth something.

 

Well, I kinda have my doubts as to whether you'll ever show back up here and see this, but what the Hell?

Iruka - Yes, that was my biggest issue with the device, that someone who can supposedly take the Sannin with ease managed to lose to someone like Mizuki, especially when he had a very good reason to fight to his utmost given that his surrogate little brother's life was on the line along with his own. There are other issues, however. First would be that I can't imagine that Konoha (especially the Council) would allow such a valuable 'weapon' as Iruka, given his strength, to lie fallow and collect dust inside a classroom. Then again, they never tried too hard to do anything with Naruto, a jinchuuriki. If he's so powerful, why didn't he do something to protect the village during the Sand and Sound Invasion? Furthermore, if he's as psychologically 'fragile' as you claim, then why is he being allowed to teach children, and the children of Konoha's most powerful shinobi clans, no less?

I don't mind you wanting to break from established molds (I've done so myself with more than one character in my own story), but to do so in a manner that results in gaping plot holes and then use the 'I'm the author and this happens because I said so' excuse to justify it doesn't really hold water with me. Not that it has to, it's your story and I certainly wouldn't change mine because a reviewer took an issue with something.

Pain - Fair enough. I still think it's highly OOC, but at least I can see that you have a reason for doing this that has real plot consequences (as opposed to the Iruka thing, which I see as something you did because you like him and wanted to make him something 'more' than the meek, somewhat goofy schoolteacher that he is in canon - feel free to correct me if you like). Also, there's plenty of evidence that Pain isn't quite all there in the head, so him acting like a total nutter isn't too out of scope.

 

I enjoyed Chuunin Exam Day up until he had Orochimaru miraculously pick up two bijuu to attack Konoha out of absolutely fucking nowhere! That, and the author is a dick who won't admit he's anything but a super, fantastic, amazing artiste!

Also, this is one of my new favourite stories. Itachi has always been a good character in my eyes, whether he is the ultimate shinobi or not, and going so far into his motivations (from multiple perspectives) is definitely interesting.

The writing style is engaging, the plot is very good and I'm enjoying the aside with Jiraiya and Orochimaru. So with that in mind, and since I can't really think of anything unenjoyable about it, I'll give it a 5/5. The romance could make or break it though, depending on how he uses it.

 

Also, this attitude alone rates you exponentially higher than Perfect Lionheart in my estimation.

 

Questionable.

No.

He had a lover, who was also an Uchiha.

He also had a good friend, that was like a brother to him according to others, who he apparently felt was his most precious friend. His name was Shisui.

You see where I'm going with this?


Jump on the gay!Itachi bandwagon with me, brotha!

 

Not to get off topic, but any word on WWE or HotH, Howdy?

Just asking...

 

Pain is neither a man or a monster. HE IS GOD!!!!

 

Perfect Lionheart is an utter disgrace as a person, and a failure as a writer.

 

To be objective - Lionheart's fics are rather good at the beginning. His Chuunin exam fic was good for the first fifteen chapters or so. But when he started to please his virginal ego by adding girls in this massive harem and giving TAILS - it failed. I din't read any further so I don't know how much more he fucked up a rather nice concept.

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