Title: Harry Potter and The Warlord
Author: deconneur
Rating: M
Genre: Action/Adventure/Romance
DLP Category: Alternate Universe
Chapters: 12
Words: 124,279
Updated: Sep 10, 2010
Published: Dec 11, 2006
Status: Abandoned
Summaryost HBP. Harry somehow accomplished is destiny, but everyone died. Him included. Really? No, he lands in an other world. One where he is 6, have siblings & parents. A world that knows nothing of the horrors of war. A world where he can make a difference
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3284085/1/

Just read this one today, its not a groundbreaking fic and has some cliches but over all its pretty solid and has managed to keep my interest, so i decided to share, I did a quick search of the forum and didn't see this posted so here it is.
Harry pretty much goes to new timeline as a 6 year old with all of his memories and blah blah blah but then it takes a twist and well. . . i suggest you read cause its pretty crazy. The story, however, does seem to feature a rather Political! Harry and a Economist! Harry. give it a shot i guess id say it gets 4/5 for me mainly for keeping my interest but i also want to see where this one goes so my rating may change.


Checked by Minion, June 28, 2015

 

I tried this a while ago. I think it was the whole mushy family lovely-dovely crap that deterred me from reading it. Might give it another try.

 

yeah that whole mushy family thing kinda dissapears, one of the better parts of the story.

 

The first chapter is cringe worthy.

Everything after that is pretty good and held my attention.

4/5

 

Yeah, after plowing through the first two chapters, the fic becomes really enjoyable. I especially liked his canon-friendly description of Occlumancy - simple, elegant and logical.

I still don't like all the family related crap that jumps up now and then. Lily worship and idiot!James is really getting old; and even though this story does it rather moderately, I'd rather if he hurried along Harry's growth and just skipped over the whole super!kid crap. Oh, and the whole magical contract thing is too perfect and overused - he should figure out some other way for Harry to play his game. Because having everyone sign the contract is just dull.

So, not bad. Once you break through the first two chapters, the story gets really entertaining, even with all the semi-cliches and 6 year old Harry running around & taking over the world. Sweet.
4.1/5

 

i agree ip82 about the magical contract thing. everyone signing it is just childish and lame. the story is good though but it is really very unbeliavable and far away from reality for James to abandon his family like that. 4/5

 

Its interesting, and certainly makes use of the fact that its an AU. Some characters are unexplicably out of character, until you realise, its in an AU. Also, about James leaving. He is portrayed in the books as being quite immature and irresponsible. His wife has just nearly died, perhaps he's running away from that?

The contract, whilst originally a reasonable creation, is used too often to make is believable.

On the flip side, I do love Janus' character for whatever reason.

4/5

 

This story hits the biggest pothole in time-travel fics - worrying too much about changing the things that should be changed first. Made worse by that Harry assumes the alternate reality he ends up in will follow the same path as his, despite clear differences just in the cast of characters.

Beyond that we are supposed to believe that in this different universe with living Potter and Longbottoms, the economy and political system will proceed as they did in Harry's universe, not to mention the long odds of Ron perfectly assessing non impacting trades in the market for the past time period just so happens to begin when Harry gets there. A lot of loose threads, and I'm afraid it seems to be near the tipping point.

2/5 through part 7

 

no points

I thought the story was terrible, 0/5

" The wards were supposed to forbidden his escape not pull him toward them"
"a bright golden flash stopped him in mid-air and he felt to the floor"

maybe I am to picky but stupid things like that break up the story to much I lose concentration, if the author doesnt care enough to check over his work for obvious mistakes than why should I bother reading it. The story felt as if he was winging it, typing away and thought occurs so he put it in, than another and so on, no planning. My vote would be for the bin.

 

I've read this before and its quite good. All he needs is a beta to fix up the small word errors. There's not many errors so its all good


4/5

 

The author's French, therefore a few mistakes are forgiveable (I'm biased, but still). From experience, I can also tell it's hard to get a beta in those conditions, especially if you're relatively new to ff world. Also, about the "forbid/forbidden" problem... Remember we had to learn the entire list of English irregular verbs at school; you're lucky he wasn't turned off enough to drop English completely .

Haven't read the story, but I will eventually.

 

i had a lot of trouble getting past the first sentence. it lacked finesse and was completely stupid. i did however get past it, and when i did i found that the story was sub-par. writing style was moderate, and the harry portrayed was just there. nothing extreme in any direction. 2.5/5

 

Well I from what I have read it looks to be a good story and I like it not alot of mistakes that I could find so I give a 4/5

 

When I'm in the mood for a Super!Harry, I really enjoy this one. It has nifty ideas and a slow-but-strong buildup. Some of the "don't change the future" precautions are irritating, especially when they could be bypassed so easily (esp. protecting Lucius so that Dobby could be recruited on the correct date.) On the upside, I really enjoy how Harry keeps surprising the adults around him.

I only wish Deconneur would update. I've spent a year looking forward to seeing James get what he deserves for abandoning his children, and what he does to Frank to try to pass the guilt. Not to mention whether Sirius is suspicious of his inheritance.

4/5 For great ideas, minus Harry's overly conservative protection of the time line.

 

fail fail fail

And then, chapter two. First this:

Then this:

He goes from a little boy to six year old urber warrior. He's like a human ferrarri...

0/5 for unrealism

 

3.5 out of 5. It's good, and worth the read. However, it needs a beta for sure, and has some significant pacing issues, particularly when Harry is shifting between "Cute little 6-year-old" and "Seasoned Veteran" that currently require large suspensions of disbelief. Now, personally, I can just set it aside and gloss over it, but I shouldn't have to.

 

Lots of conflicting reviews, but read the first chapter anyway, and yes it was painful. The story itself isn't too horribly bad, but some of the grammar mistakes annoy me. Not a lot of spelling mistakes, but spelling does not the English language make. Would be better if he had a beta I think, but as they said, it does pick up some in the later chapters. Not something I would really recommend though.

 

WTF is happening here. I've been out of the country for a few months and come back to DLP full of necro posts.

 

So now, determined not to be outdone, you're necroposting yourself. You stupid fuck.