Updated Bitches

I must say I love where this story is going so far. The whole Itachi/Naruto Interaction, Danzo's plot, and Yugito thoughts on the Traitor Naruto. 5/5

 

I'm getting a distinct Resident Evil impression from this latest chapter. I got mixed feelings if that's the case.

Otherwise, 4.5/5 on latest chapter. -.5 for for someone crushing on Itachi

 

That's what people keep saying @ Resident Evil.

...I've never played a Resident Evil game. Ever.

 

Most zombie games are all the same, though RE is pretty much the staple of the genre so people will jump to that as the first of all possible inspirations. Still, I love the genre so I'm watching this in anticipation of what will happen next.

Also, as opposed to confucius I actually enjoyed the by-play with Itachi, and Naruto grousing that he doesn't receive the same attention as the Uchiha highlights a couple of parallels between this and the canon Uzumaki-Uchiha relationship. That Itachi has a bit of a prankster streak in him, though I suppose that could be said of most people with a sadistic side to them, makes it work in a way that just tickles the irony-lover in me. Whoda thunk it that an Uchiha would take the traditional place of Naruto as the prankster?

5/5

 

Yes it's a good fic, great writing, characterization, plot, and suspense. The interest factor for me is very good.

4.5/5

.5 off because of the Japanese words. I understand it's a Japanese manga but all those unfamiliar words sort of break the story apart for me and usually I'm left wondering what in the world does this or that word mean. This is a personal pet peeve of mine.

Possibly the best Naruto fanfic I've read though. Keep up the good work LT2000.

 

It's the opposite for me, lol. I at least want to see proper name suffixes and such (nine times out of ten I will automatically quit a story if I see the term 'Lord Hokage' used). Howdy can be pleased to know that he's the rare ten.

 

To be fair, normally I just throw out the suffixes altogether since they don't really belong in an English language story, according to me.

You can't just call someone "Hokage" though, can you?

 

The problem is not the suffixes and such. Some authors just make some jutsu name using a crappy translator and expect everyone to understand it. Is the same crap with HP fanfictions, make some shit-latim spell and dont describe its use.

The way I see it, most people would understand the most usual stuff:
Rasengan, Kage bunshin, and whatever just that is famous. The crappy part comes after they start writing "Datton/Katton/Fuitton: unknow shit"

I just imagine it has something to do with the element and continue reading if the author doesn't give any explanation to it.

 

Yeah, I did a few crappy invented jutsu during the first fic, though I did a little more work than just typing them into an online translator. Nowadays I stick entirely to canon techniques (there's a whole library of them on leafninja that I make frequent use of).

 

I think that I would be more tolerant of this if I didn't see so many fics in which the author writes all the jutsu names in "Japanese" just for the sake of being able to add an appendix to every chapter.

Drives me nuts. Is it so much to ask to actually know what it is I'm reading when I read it?

 

I use Narutopedia for jutsus. Mix and match the Japanese words there for when I get an idea for a new Jutsu.

What you mean like this:

Kage Bunshin no Jutsu! (Shadow Clone Technique!)

No thanks, I'll stick with the appendix and some really good descripitions of the jutsu in-story.

 

Uhm..Actually, I think he meant like this:

See? One freaking and I was able to explain the shadow clone tecnique.

Its not a issue of english/japanese tecniques. Is about not giving any image to describe the fight.

Without it might as well just make some shit like:

The only thing anyone would understand there is the last action, since no one would know what the shit those jutsu mean.
Of course, you could also go to the end of the chapter to read a shit-like description of the tecnique.

No one would expect you to describe the same jutsu every couple of pages. But at least the first time on the jutsu is used on each chapter(or for some really long time on one of them) is a must.

edit: Yes, I have no idea what the fuck I typed on those jutsu.

 

As far as Japanese terms go, I'd prefer the bracket approach only on the first instance. After that, its the reader's job to keep track of it, within reason. Appendix optional. So far, the closest I've seen is an author who brackets the English translation sporadically and at random intervals.

 

I try to avoid this altogether, unless it is a canon technique, by not trying to make up a name for it within the story.

Describing the jutsu in detail is far better, in my opinion, and frankly the notion that ninja yell out the names of their techniques all the time is an anime myth that people cling to. Sure it happens on a few occasions in the manga, mostly in Part 1, but otherwise ninja like to keep their moves to themselves.

 

^ Also a good point, and one I've been trying to do. I would go back into the first fic and remove all instances of shouting jutsu names altogether, if only it weren't so much damned work.

 

I don't think it really matters, it is just a minor detail everyone ignores. It's a huge waste of time to do that, I wouldn't.

 

I don't care either way whether English or Japanese is used, though it's got to the point where English jutsu/titles seem a bit weird to me. Still, online translator jutsu are annoying, which is why we at ADD use Lutris as our personal translator .

 

I feel bad about using Lutris like a pet translator, so I tend to go to Narutopedia to learn Romanjii words.

 

Geor-sama uses a surprising amount of Japanese (especially jutsu), but I'm okay with it as the jutsus are pretty engaging. It's alright if the description is written into the action or the use. Only once or twice I've had to look at the footnotes which is distracting like I'm having to dissect poetry. -_-;;;

 

Reposted from ADD, but...survey time here.

First...I'll just admit it, I'm seriously burned out on this story. I've been writing it for years without having any other projects to work on. So recently I looked over the earlier parts, trying to find some motivation to get my ass in gear. What I discovered was that there's a whole laundry list of shit I would have done differently if I were just starting the whole thing again now.

...So that's exactly what I'm going to do, starting the fic in nearly the same manner as the original. I'm not abandoning NTS: TDE or anything, but I desperately need a creative break from it. Not only have I posted only three chapters in this entire year to date, I haven't even written a word of the next one in almost three months. What I want to know from you informed folks, is what you think should be changed from the original or what you'd like to see done differently in a rewrite. These are guaranteed changes:

- No Kyuubi running commentary, and no 'understanding' between Naruto and the Bijuu at all at the start.

- Naruto will hopefully be less of an 'asshole.' I don't plan on changing him completely, but a lot of the more caustic and grating aspects of his personality will be toned down to a large degree. Some people (Howdy I know has said this, and some others too) have told me that I tried too hard to make Naruto 'cool' and 'badass' early on in the original story, and I agree with that criticism. With several years more writing experience behind my belt and a much broader understanding of Naruto in general (when I started NTS, all I knew was stuff I'd read on the Naruto Wiki, no experience at all with the manga or even the anime) I think I can do better.

- No Anko. Seriously. Not sure whether I'll go with an AU team again or just stick with canon Team 7. Give me some opinions on that.