While Harry is fighting Vegeta near the Sun, a solar flare cooks Vegeta to a crisp.

Overjoyed by his victory, Harry fails to sees one of the many Russian satellites in time to get out of the way.

In Mother Russia, [Insert standard play on joke here]

 

I though the jokes were prompted by "In Soviet Russia..."

 

"In Soviet Russia, satellite connects with you?"

Best I could do on short notice.

 

Harry goes to sleep with his wand under his pillow and with a nightmare from Tom blows his head off.

Crookshanks decides to sleep on Harrys face.

Harry is sorted into Slytherin and gets posioned by half the house before the night is over.

 

Harry gets traped on a small abandoned island in the middle of the ocean alone with an amouros Millicent Bulstrode without his wand, he takes one look on Millicent before he jumps into the ocean and begins to swim away ...

 

And drowns because he can't swim!

 

Lesser of two evils. XD

 

Harry contracts an obscure magical illness that will hugely increase his powers if he survives. Guess what...he ain't that lucky...

 

Are we talking about the same Harry Potter here?

During Indy! Harry's magical trip to receive his inheritance from the Potters/Blacks/Merlin/Hogwarts Founders, he asks for Griphook by name, thinking he can trust him, since he was the first goblin he met. When pushed, he makes Griphook the accountant over his accounts, with almost absolute power. In a matter of days, Griphook takes out massive loans using Harry's name and money as collateral, upon which he siphons all the money out of the account. A few days later, loan sharks kill Harry accidently.

 

After catching Neville's rememberall Harry descends a little too quickly and the force of the landing causes him to vomit his own testicles.

Perhaps not lethal, but certainly ignoble.

 

I dunno...seems to me that Harry's been having a pretty extreme run of bad luck in this thread...but hey, I'm just the newbie...

Anyways, to add to the thread, Harry inherits Sirius's motorbike and immediately takes it for a test ride. While speeding down the highway screaming with joy, he inhales a large insect and dies of asphyxiation.

 

Harry decides that he wants to become an Animagus, and so decides to make the potion all by himself. However, he really is that horrible at making potions, and accidentally makes a fast acting poison. He offers it to Ron, Ginny, and Hermione so that they could have fun frolicking in the forest at two in the morning. Poor bastards never had a chance.

 

Harry accidentally gets transfigured into a cute little kitty by a bad potion, and instead of bonding with snape in an incredibly cheesy and disgusting love plot, is rendered into potion ingredients for the first years.

 

In the second event of the TriWizard Tournament, Harry dies from[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif] Naegleria
fowleri (brain eating amoeba).[/FONT]

 

lol You mean it made him even more retarded than he already was! Doh!

 

I don't think that the cool Scottish lakes are warm enough to support Naegleria fowleri.

OT: In 2001, Harry is crushed by a piece of the Mir space station.

 

It might not be warm enough but it's certainly old enough. Who knows it could be the magical cousin.