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WIP Building Bridges by Melethril - T

Discussion in 'Trash Bin' started by Hoshiakari, Dec 6, 2010.

  1. Rin

    Rin Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    1,327
    Location:
    日本福井県若狭町
    2/5 - Lexical Diarrhea

    I gave it 2/5. It's not that it's a particularly bad story, but it was boring as fuck. Introduce the AU change and get the fuck on with it. Instead, there's 8 chapters and he's managed to get through the Diagon Alley shopping trip.
     
  2. Hw597

    Hw597 Seventh Year

    Messages:
    272
    Location:
    London
    Unfortunately the author has managed to hit a pet peeve of mine. Using 1800's orphanages in the 1990's. The minute I see it I immediately think that the author has no common sense at all. How many orphanages do you know? Or roaming street kids, oliver twist style.
    The annoying fact is you could easily make a story using the realities of carehomes, foster parents and estates.
     
  3. Rin

    Rin Oberstgruppenführer DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    1,327
    Location:
    日本福井県若狭町
    Yeah, I, too, was wondering whether I was reading Oliver Twist or Harry Potter, metaphorically speaking.

    Anyone have any Saint!Harry fics out there that they can recommend?
     
  4. Hoshiakari

    Hoshiakari Second Year

    Messages:
    65
    So, there is a consensus that DD was a manipulator (extent of his manipulations is unclear) and did care only about his plans, as Taure said. Then why am I ridiculed for suggestion (not my personal belief) that he might have somehow manipulated investigation of spy in Order ?

    Reason : he wanted to force confrontation between Prophecy Children and LV. He could have been afraid of possible Dark Lord´s equal or of power that Dark Lord knows not. He might have believed that LV is immortal until confrontation etc.
     
  5. Tenages

    Tenages Order Member DLP Supporter

    Messages:
    820
    Location:
    Philadelphia, USA
    Because if that's what Dumbledore wanted to do that are 1001 easier ways to force such a confrontation. If you want to force a confrontation between people, you don't suggest that one of the parties hide under an unbreakable protection. Sirius suggests that Pettigrew be the Secret Keeper, not Dumbledore. If DD was that anxious that Voldemort confront Harry, he would have kept the Potter's in the open.

    Not to mention Dumbledore had no way of knowing whether it was Harry or Neville, which really makes keeping Peter as the spy redundant. And if he was that worried about Voldemort being immortal due to the prophecy child, he could have have killed them both himself rather than utilizing some ridiculous plan whereby Voldemort might kill them.

    In short, your supposition has so many holes its ridiculous. Just accept that you recommended a weak story and move on.
     
  6. ASmallBundleOfToothpicks

    ASmallBundleOfToothpicks Professor

    Messages:
    496
    Location:
    Tir-Na-Nogth
    This is utter fluffy crap. It's stories like this that give Light!Harry a bad name.

    1/5 for mostly grammatically sound writing.
     
  7. samkar

    samkar Temporarily Banhammered

    Messages:
    820
    I agree. I also get this weird sublime slash vibration when I read it, maybe what you see as fluff. The relations between people there are so weird.
    That McGonagall knew about Snape's love of Lily and thinks about Harry's green eyes effect on him is so OC gay. The perspective changes between character point of views are also really annoying.
    It's one of these stories where I can't really criticize the form but find the whole plot presentation and characterizing simply unattractive and not sympathic to really bother reading more.
     
  8. neopyro

    neopyro Third Year

    Messages:
    101
    Location:
    Erm... My house?
    Hmmm. I actually enjoyed this one. I admit it's a bit on the fluffy side, but it's a refreshing change from the norm. Nothing superior about it, but readable if you like the genre. 3.5/5 from me.

    Points for being grammatically sound and a well written (if not particularly engaging) plot.