I'm still marveling at the sheer stupidity needed to put 'Gizards' anywhere near a serious story. What the fuck.

 

Swinging bodies? Like... "at the end of a rope" swinging, or "put your keys in the jar" swinging? :facepalm I'll assume it's the rope one, since they went "into the light."

'Cause the "jump, jive, 'n' Wail" kind is usually called Swing Dancing.

If an author can't see that this is a poorly constructed phrase, then what does the rest of the story look like?

Assylum pretty much covers it. I think if that were the only word in the summary, I'd still be able to make an informed decision about whether or not this is a story I want to read. The rest is just further incentive to stay far, far away.

No Magic? Check.
Undercover Draco? Check.
Entire summary phrased as a series of inane questions? Check.
Spelling on par with a particularly slow howler monkey? Check.
Main setting screams 'overblown angst?' Check.
Drarry? Check. CHECK. Motherfucking CHECK!

Edit:

Whaaaat?
Aside from this making no sense whatsoever... Fennier? Gorge Weasly?
Well, at least there's a character that apparently has the same name as the author, so it just has to be good. :facepalm

 

Smack indeed.

 

A lovely summary with good spelling and a text that makes perfect sense.

 

Heh, makes me think of 'whorecrux'.

Now that's just an unopened can of worms.

 

Which in turn makes me think of a scene from Mutant Storm and Logan's statement about whore's on crutches.

 

DOBBY! KILL IT WITH FIRE.

 

^ Why the fuck would you make Dobby the main character and call it 'Harry Potter remake'?

 

Henry Claypotter by SmileyRowling
Henrey lived a normal life, until the unruly potinos master Snake spilled the beans.
Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 320 - Published: 4-20-11 - Harry P. & Severus S.

 

Because it's fanfiction, and 80% of authors are either into slash ("ZOMG DRACO AND HARRY HAWT!") or are complete morons ("Hurr, Harry's sizter/love interest is my self-insert and is the star, derp derp").

 

C'mon,
'Dobby's SUPER Fantastic Seven Years Cleaning Adventure While Stalking Some Random Students(HOTTIES!)!!' works so much better! Though I suppose there is a limit to title length.

 

...

Hello, crappy self-insert!

 

I don't even know...

 

Wow. How do you come back from writing something like that? The author admits all stories written will have diaper lover content as well.

wut?

....:facepalm

Here's an odd thing from the front page:

I've never seen someone post a question as a story before.

 

Yeah, there are some fucked up people out there.

@'Help Story': yeah, those are against FF.net rules, and I bet it's just for another shitty slash story anyway.

 

Pairing: Draco/Hermione

It's only 454 words, but please don't read it on accident like I did...

 

Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer reviews
Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer with his nose so bright that all the other reindeer teased him could save Christmas. What does Rudolph have to say about that? A Harry in Azkaban oneshot, may be continued at a later time.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 709 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 12-29-10 - Harry P. - Complete

 

Self insert: Check
Silly amount of crossovers: Check

And one of the self inserts end up with Draco: Check

 

It's kinda cute that you chose to imitate Warlocke. XD

 

I didn't even think about it until you wrote the reply.

THe writers name says everything you need to know really, but then it just get worse.