Must... wash... away... the fail... with SP/HP fusion.

--Harry Potter vs the World--

"So I was thinking…"

"Oh dear god," Hermione mumbled trying to dig herself deeper into the fascinating tome she was reading. "This can't be good."

Ron paled, pushing his sugary snack away as he shifted on the couch, "Mate, the last time you said that, I almost ended up burned to a crisp by Evil Mecha-Lockheart."

"Oi! I can have good ideas sometimes!"

"The time before that I almost got eaten by Fluffy in book 1, who suddenly developed the power to shoot lightning from his eyes," Hermione joined in, unable to resist. "And Ron got knocked unconscious by a giant chess piece that knew kung fu."

"Uh…" Harry looked a little sheepish.

"And don't even get me started on the time before that with the dragon-"

"We shall never speak about the Dragon Incident again!" Ron flushed with mortification and anger.

"But my idea is nothing like that!" Harry wailed. "I want to start a band!"

"No. Never. Ever. Things with you always mean fighting for our lives in your strange fusion world of Super Mario Brothers, Mortal Combat, and Legend of Zelda," Hermione flipped to the next page, hoping for that this idea would soon pass. "Plus, I doubt you can even play an instrument."

Harry assumed an indignant poise, "I will have you know I learned how to play bass over the summer. It'll be awesome! I mean, it's not like there's any competition, except the Weird Sisters, and they aren't even that good! I mean you've all listened to some of my old tape collection, and my walkman, right? How do the Weird Sisters compare to the Stones, or Hendrix, or the Doors, or The Clash at Demonhead or-"

"Huh, I can sing. I was the one who put Fluffy to sleep," Ron said, coming around to the idea, even as Hermione winced at the memory of Ron's singing voice. The only thing that could be said for the delusional Weasley was that he could carry a tune. Well, specific kinds of tunes anyway. Sometimes. "And besides, it's something to do since you got kicked off of the Quidditch team for bringing monsters to practice. And for damaging the field during your fight with said monsters. I heard it'll take them two weeks to repair the pitch."

"Ron, don't give in," Herione pleaded, "Things like this never turn out well around Harry! What would Professor McGonagall say?"
--

"We aren't calling it 'Sex Bob-omb', Harry," Hermione sat crossly at the transfigured drum kit, glaring at both of her best friends. She'd never felt so betrayed by her role model, Minerva McGonagall, music lover.

"But-"

"No."

"Hey, I think I got the hang of this guitar thing!" Ron shouted excitedly. He began to play a shaky, barely recognizable rendition of 'Smoke on the Water'. Not for the first time Hermione was thankful they'd put layers of silencing charms around this unused classroom. At least no-one else would have to experience the sheer, utter failure that was the band they were now calling the Magnetic Kneazles, because Harry and Ron had lost name giving privileges.

--

Sirius Black ran as fast as his four emaciated legs would carry him. His eyes rolled around in his sockets, a panicked fear flowing up his nearly visible spine. His weary paws chafing on the cold marble stairwell to the secret entrance behind the statue of Barnabus the Barmy on the fourth floor. He needed to get as far away from that… that cacophony of pain and dread that echoed through the halls. It turns out silencing charms actually wore off quicker in the presence of noise above a certain number of decibels.

To his sensitive doggy ears it was like walking into a barrage of blasting curses all aimed at his nadgers. He could get the traitor some other time. When Harry and his band weren't practicing.

If Sirius ever found out precisely who's idea it was to butcher 'Back in Black' that sadistically, there would be words.
--

"Behold the power of Positive Thinking!"

Sirius' bloodshot eyes widened as hundreds of ethereal Prozac™ pills slammed into the swarming Dementors. Quite suddenly, the utter depression in the air vanished, leaving a faint sense of wooziness, confusion, and emotional balance.

How the hell did Harry know what Prozac capsules look like? Hermione wondered. After a moment of contemplation from the back of an equally shocked hippogriff, she quickly reconsidered. If you really thought about it, it made a lot of sense.
--

 

I keep seeing Thumbs up at the bottom of some post and I was wondering how you guys were doing that?

Anyway, like that little piece of work there!

 

Bottom right hand corner of the post, next to the quote button, it's the button that looks like a thumb.

 

Except for that Basilisk can't have them right now. It's something that unlocks automatically once you hit 40 or so posts.

 

You need either 25 or 50 posts (can't remember which) to see/use the thumbs though. They really should put that in the FAQ.

EDIT: ninja'd

 

For some reason, the mental image of Hermione running away from an evil 'eye-beam' Fluffy is making me fucking laugh at the moment.

 

Alright, thank you for the info.

 

I don't know about you, Basilisk, but I think I'm going to go thumb up some posts right now!

 

Not really a plot bunny (though who knows), but this is a good place to post this.

I was reading on the other forum discussion about possibility of making Spider-Man a black guy (there was the same discussion on DLP once) and it got me thinking about something similar - black Harry Potter.

At first it doesn't look like a big deal, because skin color doesn't matter in HP universe (unlike a blood purity), but then you start thinking about the subtext. Before that - do we make both parents black or only one? Which one? Let's go with James. This means that his competition with Snape over Lily becomes rivalry between a black guy who is good at sports with an intellectual white guy. What a great stereotypes.

What about Dursleys and how they treated Harry? A white guy making a black kid his personal slave and keeping him in a cupboard under the stairs? I'm sure this wouldn't be controversial at all. And Voldemort? The whitest guy around (I mean the palest) time and time again trying to kill a black kid for seemingly no reason?

More? Harry is good at Quidditch (sport) like his father? Of course, because they both are black. He may not have his mother eyes, but he has his father skin. He's not too bright, but fortunately there is always someone white (Hermione, Dumbledore) who always tells him what to do. His biggest dream is to become part of one, big white family (Weasleys).

Obviously I'm just making fun of this idea, but it's quite scary how just one little change in skin color can change so much of subtext you can read from one book.

 

Actually, this is pretty much the subtext of all the creature!Harry stories. You could have replaced 'black' with 'drow' and ended up with a very banal framework for an angsty half-drow Harry Potter story about how Drizzt-like the Boy-Who-Lived is.

 

Celestin: Thats sounds fucking boring...And I think you're reading far too much into changing his skin colour. It wouldn't make much difference, unless you wanted it to. You could accomplish those same differences through a variety of other changes as well. Making the change his skin colour is just going to annoy some of your readers, and probably result in you getting flamed by a few folk for being racist.

 

I'd have to agree with Mordecai, I don't think it would change much unless you decided to make some of the characters racist that way. They already are with the blood angle, and that seems to fit their culture better. If you were aiming to keep the characters close to canon, they would have a bigger reaction to a change in him if he was discovered to be say, a muggleborn. But even then, it would mostly affect the people that are his enemies anyway. You would probably need to come up with a few more changes to have it deviate from the original story, if that was your plan.

And then it would be a Harry with different parents unless you decided to have James be adopted.

Then there is the other way; but Pure-blood Harry seems to occur more often if you go either of these routes.

 

Let me be clear about this - it's not a plot bunny per se. I was mostly making fun of changing skin color of characters that's happening for some time (especially in comics/movies - Fury, Heimdall to name a few). And yes, as I said, it wouldn't make much change in what happens in books, but you'd get a whole new subtext meaning from them.

 

Your arrogant, muggle way of thinking is cramping my Crumple-Horned Snorkack.

 

Could be a funny Snape one shot.

Snapes working himself up to let loose a torrent of hate when his enemies son finally arrives in his grasp.

Sorting happens, Harrys name is called and black!Harry comes forward.

So not only did Lily reject him and marry James, she was sleeping around anyway.

Problem, Snape :awesome

 

This must exist. Write it now. :fire

 

We need something like this (Mass Effect story):

The wizarding world is slowly disappearing. To prevent the extinction of the wizards, Harry becomes a renegade -- ala Darth Vader -- for the greater good. Through his actions (invading countries and committing atrocities or the like), he forces the wizarding world to unite against him. Through this action, the wizarding world is forced to finally catch up to the muggle world. This ensures their survival, as Harry intended.

In the event that Harry becomes too dangerous, a threat to the greater good, he will have someone close (perhaps Ron?) assassinate him and take up his mantle to continue his vision.


...basically it's code gaess plot combined with Uchiha Madara's idea for world peace (except that this is geared for survival of the wizards as a race, not world peace) combined with the world of HP.

---------- Post automerged at 03:03 AM ---------- Previous post was at 12:57 AM ----------

I just thought of something!

...I haven't seen anyone use the invisibility cloak like that. Dude, the potential is limitless here.

 

On your first idea, sounds like all it would do is degenerate into people arguing over whether the wizarding world needed to 'catch up with the muggle world' as you put, or not. It also sounds like it would need a really really good author to carry off with any degree of success.

On your 2nd idea...how old are you? It would be cheap wank material and nothing more. Certainly no story value to it.

 

Been done to death, and it's a rip from KotOR - Revan, Kreia/Traya, etc.

 

How about an AU world with Tom Riddle surviving an AK from Grindelwald and becoming the boy who lived? Would he still become a dark lord and target Harry Potter? Where would he live?