I thought he was blind?

 

Just 'cause he's totally blind, that doesn't mean he can't detect hot, underage chicks checking him out in the halls. Or possibly his dick has some sort of automatic alert response.

 

Well. *snickers*

I mean, blindness has never stopped _me_ from seeing hot chicks. Why should it stop a wisserd?

I feel that if someone blind read this post, I'd be Number Rock Bottom of our species.

 

Nah he sees the matrix.

 

In the Matrix, *everyone* could be hot. And limber, and not prone to pulled muscles and gastric upset.

Big selling point for getting plugged in.

 

Fixed it for you.

 

Win.

 

Let’s try to restart this thread again. Day after day there are new gems to unearth and place in our little treasure chest labelled “Awesomely Bad”.

Soooo... everyone guess how the title is related to the summary. It's basically about a girl on the rags in a tent with two boys.

Of course it's Hermione, the brightest witch of her year, and she analyses the problem quite scientifically, considering the options at hand.

That last thought actually reveals something about the author. It seems she isn't into foot fetishism. But then - why would she write this fic if she really isn’t into that?

Oh, yeah, the author is female. Why would Harry and Ron react at all? Maybe the author doesn’t have a brother and really doesn't know that quite often boys and men use socks, usually used socks at that, to soak up... stuff... – which, btw, might lead to rather embarrassing questions: "Why is there a sock in your bed? And why is it all crusty?"

Ohwait - wizards don't use socks. They usually are using charmed cotton gloves.

Back to the story: Circumstances eventually enforce a decision:

... what was Harry doing with that sock? Did he run out of cotton gloves?

See above. Talk about socks and gloves and all that.

Endnote: Cotton Gloves can be found here: http://restrictedsection.org/story.php?story=2672
And embarrassing questions about crusty socks here: https://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=17689

 

Yup. Awesomely bad.

'Cause Of Course an adult witch with months of time to plan won't think of this.

I need to go down to the hobby shop:
1) a wax doll
2) silver pins. Long ones.
3) black thread
4) red paint

Why did I read the quotes? Why why why?

 

I assume every member of DarkLordPotter already knows about the “XYZ is / are reading the Harry Potter books”.

Meanwhile it’s an entire genre, more and more often covering other themes as well, like timetravel: “Harry’s kids transport the Harry Potter Books back in time to read them with their parents”, Veela!mate slash: “Harry and Draco read the Harry Potter Books”, Sevitus or Severitus: “Snape reads the Harry Potter Books”, and even crossovers: “Frodo reads the Harry Potter Books.”

It’s quite a difficult genre, difficult even for experienced authors. Many brilliant authors soon get lost in numerous twists and turns, go astray in sophisticated plot devices, and complex characters. As a consequence they start to mix up their worlds, books and fanfiction slowly merge into a melange, and the author starts to lose sight of his or her original goal – have XYZ read through all seven books. So sadly almost all stories of this genre eventually will be abandoned.

Now there is another author having a go at this challenging task.

Kirsty92 is a relatively new author, publishing her first story on fanfiction.net. She carefully announces to cover only book one, mixing in some timetravel with sending the Golden Trio back in time to meet the Marauders for a joint reading (actually it is a bit more complicated than that: the Marauders start reading the books and then, suddenly, – but no – I don’t want to spoil it).

Someone might argue it isn’t outstanding enough to deserve an entry in a DLP thread. One might even say it’s just another random piece like numerous other fics published every day. But these arguments do unjustice to a level of quality rarely seen in fanfiction:

This story actually is a piece of art - post modern art at its best. Kirsty92 doesn’t simply copypaste passages of Harry Potter – no – she is in fact confronting the brilliant and sophisticated J.K.Rowling with an uneducated fan and her sometimes downright brute choice of grammar and spelling:

Kirsty is skilfully creating an impressive picture of 'Rowling meets fanfiction'. You might not have noticed it yet, but she is applying a special technique, a subtle trick to enforce her message. Thus even inexperienced readers should be able to get a grasp of her genius:

Altogether it is an impressive work of art and at the same time an easy going light read. I strongly recommend this to everyone:

The golden trio and the maurauders read book one by Kirsty92
Harry, ron and hermoine join james, sirius, remus and lily to read the harry potter books
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Fantasy/Family - Chapters: 3 - Words: 8,155 - Reviews: 6 - Updated: 11-10-11 - Published: 11-9-11 - Harry P.
​

 

I don't understand what kind of deluded and insane person would even think that "reading the books" was anywhere close to a sensible and interesting concept.

 

He was being funny

 

Found this gem via fffn when surfing for H/T stories. Not quite up to My Immortal's standards, but close. The author is, probably, a 12-year-old boy with too much free time on his hands. His first chapter is so much riddled with grammar errors that I cried with laughter. The plot, the dialogues, sentence structure, and his remarkable consistency: they all add just as much. Here is the entirety of the first chapter. I wanted to leave sarcastic remarks, but decided they would subtract from the joy.

Frankly, I feel a little bad deriving so much fun from an honest kid who, considering his age, did a really good job. In fact, there're signs that he could turn out to be a good author, I think.

Link.

 

Nope. She's a 10th grader. Or at least she was, back in 2007. She might even be 20 by now.

 

Obvious Troll was Obvious, also if it looks like My Immortal, it is weak Troll, don't bother.

 

Sounds like something from Power Rangers. Come to think of it, it would occasionally be useful to be able to turn yourself into the Megazord. Giants and werewolves would be no match for you.

 

HP/Power Ranger crackfic (really more of a crossover not to take serious) now coming soon

 

Hermione would make a good Power Ranger. She's already got her pink spandex and obligatory copy of 'Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul.'

 

Hmmm, not that I'm concentrating on her face too hard, but she looks a lil' piggish.

Seems like she's growing her hair out from her wannabe-dyke phase, though.

 

Amy Jo Johnson looks like pig too. Perfect.