Disclaimer: This is not meant to discriminate against any viewpoints or sexualities, despite how it might read. :facepalm

So I was trolling for the worst fanfiction summaries on FFn, and I found...

I opened it, and I was intrigued. Despite the /bangs head on desk quality of it, it actually had some legitimate points.

I realize that Ginny as a character isn't popular around here (I don't like her much either), but if we look beyond her terribad characterization, and utilize her as a... well, read this review I left.

Another note: I thought about it some more, and I'm currently playing with the idea that Dumbledore sort-of ruled Britain as the Chief Warlock rather than the Minister because of the literary implications of his sexuality, honestly.

 

Sometimes a fifty-foot snake is just a fifty-foot snake.

 

What is this I don't even...

/In case any college-age DLP'ers are struggling to find a major: This is a fine example of what somebody with a degree in English Lit does rather than work.

 

LOL I might consider that when I get to college It'd be nice to get grants for bs, google, and a bunch of books I read years ago :X

 

You crazy son of a bitch. Don't forget to work in the concept of "Harry as Snitch."

Final nail in the coffin for HHr shippers, there (and also the 17 or so who were still H/Cho fans).

 

LOL

On the next Lungs-make-Philosophical-Observations: Harry as a Snitch? The Fine Game of Quidditch underpining Sexuality in Rowling's Discourse, and why Harry/Ginny shippers are Justified.

loljk, I'm never doing this again. *laughs*

 

Or Gender Studies.

Or Psych.

 

OntheImportanceofLungs, it's normal for me to be a little scared of you ? I wouldn't want to meet you in dark alley. Do you heard of Armin Meiwes?

 

@Feanor: Oh god, is that the cannibal? :X

I don't understand how this is scary at all. At worst, I could be some sort of philosophical sexual predator. As it is, I'm just a kid with a bunch of books. :|

 

When did the Elder Wand ever only "sort of" work for Dumbledore? It always worked fine for him.

If you take that out, your asexual-homosexual-heterosexual analogy fails. Because there's no "homosexual stage" with the Elder Wand. So it doesn't really say anything about Harry's sexuality.

Which was the logical conclusion in the first place. Didn't we stop taking psychoanalysis seriously years ago?

 

Or philosophy.

Seriously, you should see some of the things I do with my philosophy degree. If people were capable of coherent thought after my discourses, they would surely be rendered insane. Just ask Taure.

 

No, Dumbledore, in Deathly Hallows. The Elder Wand doesn't have a "stage" for homosexuality, but his manner of using it - without bragging about it, without toting it to the public, etc, defines his "closeted" status. He closets his Elder Wand because he can't bear the shame of getting it from Gellert, and the everpresent Desire for Gellert.

On Foucault's statement about society constructing homosexuality, this is possibly one of the best examples. If Dumbledore had not had the Desire break off clean from his father, to wash his hands of his father's image as a muggle-torturer, he might have been just another schoolteacher. Instead, he became the Albus Dumbledore due to the (correct me if I'm wrong - I'm far worse at Psychology) reverse Westermarck effect. He imprinted upon Gellert, despite the fact that "in his heart of hearts [he] knew what he was" <-- that quote may be unintentionally paraphrased.

Thus Dumbledore isn't castrated (as Voldemort is - the wand won't work for him at all), but rather, repressed. Harry is neither, lending credence to the theory.

@DarkSov: Schizophrenia is just another way to break free of the repression paradigm of the capitalist factory. :awesome

 

Well, I can say that the 'essay' is a pile of shit.

The author of the essay is just grasping at straws, making conclusions on 'evidence' that either simply doesn't exist, or is so vague that any number of conjectures could be drawn from it/them.

As said before?

 

Mine, or the "story" by the author, Jormungandr?

 

Both. It's a steaming pile of bullshit.

 

To be fair, I wrote mine in under ten minutes, and mostly to use the word "castration" far more often than I could have in nearly any other thing I could have written in that time

 

This whole thread is a failing pile of shit. Seriously.

 

Counterpoint: Harry described his first kiss as "wet" and spent more of his adolescence thinking about his mom than his grand total of two sterile, sexless relationships. Attempts to read coherent symbolism from a story in which the above takes place are sorely misguided.

 

JK's a woman and her only child is a girl. Of course she wasn't going to nail male adolescent sexuality. And considering that little adventure would mean Harry surreptitiously jerking off under the covers to a page torn out of Playwitch while trying not to wake up the four other blokes in the room, that's probably a good thing.

 

JK Rowling's gender has nothing to do with this. Her writing would have been just as sexlessly alien to the experiences of an adolescent girl. The real problem was that she was kind of a boring, skittish marm uncomfortable with even the idea of hinting at this important element of adolescence, much less going into the gory details.