I hate you.

 

As I read through the chapter I have a number of thoughts, first off - thanks Santi, you made my night.

Finding out about Snape's history with the Rosiers gave a bit of insight to something I'd wondered about. I always presumed that the person Snape was referring to when he examined Harry's spell chain was Bellatrix - the Rosier connection & all. But if he was close to Evan, perhaps it was him? He did say that the person wasn't necessarily a friend, and I wouldn't call the person who recruited him to the service of a madman that.

The elemental was pretty cool. Much like the expansion charm, it's gotten off to a rocky (no pun intended) start. I expect that this is just the precursor to something more powerful. One thing that I like with Harry's progression is scenes like these where we see him exploring new magic (successful or not). Having it in the image of the life that was taken is a pretty good take on it too; versus a collections of stones forming a shape or something along those lines.

Reading about Tonks' friends partying and Harry's crush sprung an idea into my head. Umm, I've never actually read a Krum/Tonks-ship... HEY! It could happen! They just need a certain mutual acquaintance to introduce them, lol. Not sure where they'd meet though.

Lots of room in the top box. I've wondered at what Harry's interaction with the Ministers would be since he'd first learned Bulgarian. Thought there might be more interaction, but I guess there's no real reason for it. It was a neat little scene and maybe Harry's sparked Fudge's interest? The bit with Draco was great. I'd wondered if his courtship would be mentioned by the Malfoys, and Harry shut it down very nicely.

I liked how you wrote Calypso's introduction to the family (the rabbit incident at the end was a nice touch), though I have to wonder at the few flashes of manipulation that Harry picked up. While his suspicions may be plausible, with the way it was written I can't tell if it's bad suspicion or if he admires how she handled it. Mentioning Sirius & his Dad joking has me leaning towards the latter.


Really enjoyed it, will probably enjoy it even more when I read it tomorrow. Shame we have another 4 months to go until the next part, but no helping it, right? Besides it's not nearly as bad for us as the FFN crowd, heh. Good luck in the coming semester!


EDIT: oh, and while I'm not really great at it, I thought that the second 'Nathan' in this paragraph didn't sound quite right considering he'd just said it already. It could almost be taken right out.

 

The Sirius/Harry scenes are by far the best scenes of the summer chapters. Harry and the Weasley's is always cringeworthy. Sentences like “Wait,” Bill said, suddenly, “You're actually trying to enchant a broomstick? I thought you were Ron's age?” are terrible. We get it. Harry's more advanced than Hogwarts students of his age, but reading Weasley parents scene when Harry showed them his enchantment receptical was easily as bad. And reading the Harry/family interaction is always like watching a trainwreck; nasty, but you can't help but watch. I don't think there's been a scene involving James and Lily where I've actually thought "Hey, that's good." The Calypso scene could have been written better as well I feel, it didn't really seem natural or realistic, again due to bad James and Lily writing, everyone else was fine.

Also, even though it's just a pet peeve of mine is how you describe active occlumency. It's more than just a keeping a blank look on your face (have you ever seen someone with a blank look? They're usually retarded.) Occlumency is about controlling emotions, that doesn't mean emotionless. Snape, Voldemort and Dumbledore are never described as having a blank face at any point in time, and for good reason. It's about not letting your anger get the best of you, being able to think calmly in perilous situations, being able to mask your emotions and not drawing extra attention to yourself. A blank face is not a normal reaction, and is going to draw attention. Its about keeping calm and collecting and being able to act normal in any situation.

No need to mention all the good stuff about the chapter, everyone else has already covered it I bet, but I wouldn't know since I gave up reading this thread at about page 20 of 38.

Just some things to think about.

 

I didn't like this line it's just too insulting for a politician... not that there aren't ones that stupid in real life. In canon he said "it was very funny" which is more playful than calling another head of state a fool.

This was your best use of Ron's character yet. Off to the side because he and Harry don't get along. It is nice to see an appearance that doesn't exist just to bash him.

Also, what is the deal with the switch to full chapters? Is this just your primary place to upload the story now? Have you given up on FF.net?

 

It certainly shows how much both of them improved. I like other things about first part of Ch. 15, though.

 

I doubt he could really blame her for manipulating 'meet the parents day.' It's a suitably terrifying experience for everyone, every time. I can only imagine that the anticipation of the encounter would be increased tenfold if I thought her parents were predisposed to hating me, like Calypso must have. Harry was also sweating on it, I think he'd be grateful for her hamming things up. Of course if they start dueling the next scene...

Also I think we are seeing the beginning of the end for Victor and Kira. Attacking anyone in the back, in the presence of his parents, at a public gathering, then being thrown out and almost arrested is kind of a deal breaker. I don't know if an engagement would endure. In a high-school romance the odds are even lower.
Edit: That is of course dependent on Calypso having told Harry the truth. I lean towards her being truthful however since Kira has been shown to be quite unbalanced-almost psychopathic.

 

Greener: Didn't Snape also say that his "not-friend" who knew of it "wasn't a he?" or something like that? I always assumed it was Calypso's mother. That said, I am hoping that Lily connects the dots, remembers what Severus said about Calypso claiming not to spy, and brings it up to Harry.

 

Severus carefully didn't specify whether his acquaintance with the increasingly difficult, duelling calibre spell chain was male or female.

 

That's some real talk right there. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it before, but I really love the interaction between Sirius and Harry. I find Sirius teasing Harry to be humorous, and I like Harry having someone in which he can confide. They also just generally seem happy to see each other. Sirius hugged him the moment he stepped out of the fire, and they were smiling like a couple of idiots during most of their time together.

Does anyone else think that elf was probably Winky? It seemed like Santi might be setting up Calypso or Kira's wand to be used for casting the dark mark. Winky wasn't in the top box with Harry this time around either.

This combined with Sirius' tent being in the Chimera area makes me think I know what one of the tasks is going to be. This seems like something the Santi would do.


Don't think I didn't notice Krum's jersey either. Harry promised he'd wear it several chapters ago. That's some serious continuity.

 

Oh, I think I see what's coming. Ron is going to accuse Calypso of casting the Dark Mark!

 

Nah, he'll accuse Harry of casting the Dark Mark. Calypso is a fairly reasonable assumption, as far as stupid assumptions go, so that pretty much rules her out.

 

What Dark Mark, fellas?

 

The one that doesn't get cast because Harry and Calypso break out the Dark Arts and take some names when the Death Eaters show up.

 

If I didn't love your work so much that little spoiler tag wouldn't be such a big deal... but since I do I consider it to be evil on par with A Dance with Dragon's ending that left me craving more.

 

Pfft, if this makes you mad, just wait til Nathan beats Harry in the TriWizard.

 

Some of us can't see chapter 15 so we have to take a guess about what is going to happen next.

Actually, strangely enough, I'm not upset about not being able to see it. The end of this chapter was quite satisfying. The only thing that really interests me is who won the duel. I was wondering about what would happen in a duel between those two right before this chapter was posted.

 

This has nothing to do with chapter 15.

Before the match started Kira's spell/curse hit was intercepted by a seemingly random house elf. The only reason an elf would jump in the path of a curse would be to protect it's master. Calypso didn't mention anyone being there, because she didn't see anyone. I thought it was obvious.

 

Well, Harry was doing pretty well against her when she was able to use legilimency on him.

She now can't use that tactic, much as she can't against Kira. On top of that, Harry's general skill with magic is superior to Calypso. On top of that, I think Harry is beginning to pull away in terms of Dark Arts knowledge. Rosier Sr. gave him spells he didn't give to Calypso, for example.

So I think in a "fair duel" Harry would win.

However, I think Calypso still possesses greater savvy when it comes to duelling instincts etc. I think it's entirely possible that she could win in a real life situation through clever tricks, playing dirty, and so on.

Give Harry a few more years and he'll just be able to completely overwhelm her Just like Dumbledore vs. Bellatrix.

So, on the subject of elementals, I very much enjoyed this addition. And the whole "image" thing is great. It presents many interesting ideas involving dead First Task dragons and a dragon golem.

 

Was Calypso right in front of Krum's parents when she tried to curse her or did she follow her a bit on the way to the bathroom and do it then?

 

Can someone please post the link to, chapter 15 part 1 please.