This link was posted over on CaerAzkaban and made me laugh a while - though you might appreciate it:

The 5 Most Depraved Sex Scenes Implied by 'Harry Potter'

The rest of the site has some funny lists, just going through them now...

 

You must be new.

 

Why? Would this be the wrong forum? Not about fanfics per-say, but content within canon HP. I didn't think it extreme enough for the 'sick & perverse' sub forum.

Edit: Hmm... ah, right, should have been General Discussion - sorry about that. If any admin are paying attention, I'd love it if you could move this over. Thanks.

 

She was referring to the fact that everyone on the internet and their cats (especially their cats) know about Cracked already

I think.

 

Yeah I'm a bit of a late-comer - been using it strictly for fanfiction & porn :awesome Can't speak for my cat though.

 

Well, that was rather funny- not that I hadn't thought about all those bizarre scenes/implied situations before.

 

And these are just the painfully obvious ones. I've been meaning to re-read the series just to spot all the "Oh dear god" moments I would have missed back when I was a younger, innocent child

 

Even as a child I was a little freaked out at the implications of Aberworth and his goat.

 

I think we should adapt Potter Law XVII for Umbridge as well.
And, mythology or no, centaurs have better taste than that, thank you very much.

 

Wut. /filler

 

Witch is sexist. Duh.

 

Scenes like this?

 

I seriously have more respect for Rowling now if she knowingly put such things in a book meant for children.

 

Haha, the original implied that it was Percy and Penelope before he didn't want anyone to know he had a girlfriend, I believe.

 

I'd thought of and dismissed the Umbridge rape: brutal rape, as in mythologically alleged, is unlikely to leave no marks, and one expects rape by creatures that outweigh the human as considerably as Centaurs do, is unlikely to be anything but brutal. Hence, I'd supposed this was post-traumatic stress due to some form of entrapment (merely physical, or perhaps with some magical component.)

 

You're forgetting that she has been in the Hospital Wing for a while by that point. Chances are if there were any marks Pomfrey would have cleared them up.

 

Nah, the way the scene was presented dissuaded that assumption.

 

Dammit man, she's a healer not a cleaner.

 

It's not as if Rowling could really straight up describe Umbridge's brutal rape marks in her childrens books. It's pretty obviously alluded to - but that's all she can really do without scarring millions of children. You just have to read between the lines.

And Aekiel's point still stands. We've seen them heal wounds pretty damn quickly in the books (Tonks healing Harry's nose, etc.) and as long as there wasn't anything drastic they could be healed before she was cleaned.

 

But if she was healed but not cleaned, how come she is not covered in centaur body fluid?