Sometimes you can see cataracts, or the little veins, or if they've been popped hard enough in the eye, they explode and you can see a whole lot of other stuff too.

I'm just sayin'.

On topic: Siri.

I fucking hate it when Sirius's name has been shortened. I want to see the fic that has Sirius shortening everyone else's name.

Hey Har, Ro, Herm, Alb. How's it hanging?

 

'Mione

That is all

 

It's probably already come up, but I can't stand Sirius and Remus calling Harry 'Pup' and 'Cub'. Irks me no end.

 

One of my favorite (as in: most annoying) pet peeves is children talking like Oxford professors. Not even that, more like prepared press statements.
I imagine it's how the author writes their college papers to sound more intelligent, but no child would ever talk that way.

Yeah, I know; you've made everyone a genius and the other ones are purebloods so they have to sound swollen, right?
I bet not even Hapsburg children ever talked like that at age 8 or 11.

It's even worse if Harry is supposed to be the poor abused orphan. How the fuck did he learn to talk like that?

 

@Ayreon - on the flip side of that you've got authors who try to make the conversations authentic and end up screwing them up big time. I think a lot of the formal speech comes from authors not knowing how to write children.

 

Its just as bad when the author goes too far in the other direction, trying to be informal when children are talking, and failing miserably. Like happened in Wit of the Raven (I think that was the fics name), where Hermione swore every third or fourth word. Kids don't. Particularly not at 11.

 

I knew one who did actually... God I wanted to smack him upside the head.

But yeah, it goes both ways. When I try to write I wind up staring at the screen trying to decide if the dialogue I wrote is something the character would actually say. I'd like to think I don't do too horrible a job. Better than the FF.net people at any rate.

 

You misunderstand. It was an analogy, where the to express themself the character sings, similiar to a Bollywood movie but not an exact scene. I do admit if it was a crack fic, it would be fucking hilarious, but the author was serious.

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7267719/2/To_Really_Know_Someone

 

Character bashing pisses me off completely, why cant this authors just give the characters some development instead of baseless bashing.
Especially a character like snape who I think given the chance (I dont mean the Snape/Hermoine shippers and harry's father snape) would make an incredible character, just think about it the man is brilliantly smart, doesn't view the world in gray and white like the other characters and I respect him a little for having two great forces in the Harry potter universe trust him.

I also think a character like Voldemort also has the potential to be a great Villain if given the chance instead of been turned into a caricature by authors. Have I mentioned how much I hate it when he is referred to as "Voldy" and other such senseless nicknames.

 

That would actually make for an interesting oneshot. There was a fic somewhere, in which the editor of the Daily Prophet misspells Voldemort, and he brutally murders the entire staff - that's when people start fearing to use his name.

Maybe, in the early days, somebody (a brash Auror or journalist, or something) writes a scathing article dismissing 'Voldy' or 'Moldywarts' as a nobody with delusions of grandeur - and then is found horrible dismembered, maybe not even dead. Would make a powerful start to Voldemort's campaign.

 

On the other hand, some fics go too far in the opposite direction by having the good guys referring to him with too much respect.

I have to resist the urge to throw up in my own mouth when I see Harry refer to him as "Lord Voldemort". He's not the 'Lord' of fucking anything, and given his relationship with Harry, which is 'I will murder you', I can't see Harry referring to him with any respect at all.

I think Dumbledore nails it when he calls him 'Tom'. It's his name, no matter how much he hates it. Truth as an insult is handy concept.

 

I always prefer it when Harry calls him Tom Riddle. It's so casual and underwhelming, which makes it such an effective insult.

 

As much as I dislike parts of DH, the very end scene with Voldemort *is* awesome in the sense that Harry is so outwardly calm, cool and collected. He and Voldemort are circling each other in the Great Hall, Voldemort (though it's obvious he's scared and unnerved) is taunting Harry, and Harry is as cool as a cucumber.

Hell, he's been dead already, what else can Voldemort do to him? There's no turning back, and Harry just advises Voldemort to "try for some remorse, Tom."

As I said, despite my disappointment with many parts of DH, that right there was badass.

 

True, too bad just afterwards starts the worst disappointment of the whole series.

 

I'd like to expand on this. The whole concept of two people walking into a room and just instantly sizing each other up from the handshake to the look in someone's eyes (which we've already established is bullshit) irks me to no end.

This is very common in crossovers, where writers need to establish that the characters are trustworthy and on the same team and instead of doing it in any slow gradual way just have the main characters psychoanalyze each other with nothing more to go with than a handshake. Yes people do this in real life (and even then don't base they're entire opinion on it), but then it's subconscious and we don't have to read about it. I just read a fic like this and it really annoyed me.

 

Jim Butcher and the Dresden Files respectfully disagree.

 

I also want to expand more on my original post.

Reading about icy eyes is also a major annoyance. Dark looks and glares fit the description a lot more than 'an icy look in his eyes'.

I also hate it when people see vulnerability, sadness, wisdom, knowledge, and other shit in people eyes. Eyebrows and other facial part once again is the give away.

Another bother to me is when the subject of mask or facade comes up. Everyone acts different in different sittuations and many people mask their true emotions in cases like when they are sad but they put up a happy act when with friends or other similar situations.

It's even worse when people actually have conversations about them like, 'if you drop your mask i will drop mine...' seriously? The last chapter of Deprived showed that very scene and it was pure shit.

Just a brief sentence - 'he put up a brave front' would suffice for many situations.

 

Yes, do tell us all about it, Mr. Hemingway.

Listen, we all know that when someone says "eyes" what they really mean is the whole facial expression, sometimes inclusive of the body language, etc. So please stop going on and on as if you're really enlightening all of us that, gee, eyes are eyes and you have to look at the whole face. Just because you've just come to this realization after reading your first quality literature doesn't mean the rest of us are so behind the curve.

 

No need to harp on one of my peeves, this is what this thread is for...

And all i did was write four more sentences on the subject.

And i haven't just discover this, for years this has bothered me when reading. And i am not trying to enlighten you, just explaining my frustrations and what i think of the matter.

As to writers meaning the whole facial expressions when they specificly say eyes, that doesn't make a lot of sense. Time and again i see writers making specific emotional expression by using only the eyes. Passing mentionings don't bother me as much but going on and on - much like you seem to think i am on this subject - that seriously is irritating.

In the future, it would be much apreciated if you stuck to the thread specifics instead of insulting someone for simply posting their own views on a subject.

 

You must be new to DLP...

However, referring to a characters eyes is the standard way of demonstrating what emotions they are showing on their face. The reader understands that the author is actually referring to the entire face. It comes from the fact that if you look someone in the eyes you see the entire face and get the whole picture, whereas if you look at any distinct sector of the face you'll miss something and not get the whole lot of what they are feeling.