I'm sorry if I implied that I did get it because, honestly, I felt a bit slow after reading that quote of yours. :|

This is a summary?

 

The author seems to think that it is. I have some doubts to be honest, however, it's slightly more accurate than this one:

 

2. Wolf » by damon blade reviews
Welcome one and all to my little story I have been working on the start of the New Year, I hope you all like it and yes it is Honks fic with maybe a few other pairings in the background but mainly Harry and Tonks. Enjoy and leave reivews
Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 29 - Words: 164,690 - Reviews: 913 - Updated: 12-17-1

Oh jesus...

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Is there something here? » by incandescent dreams reviews
harry and tonks, perfect couple? Follow them through the path of life and their love prevailing? what barriers will stand in their way, and what will they be? will they make it to the end or will they fail - if they do: for what reasons? VOTE MY POLL PLZ!
:facepalm

 

22. Goffic Gurl » by BlackHeartGothic97 reviews
Join one gurl as she goes into the world of Harry Potter!
Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,300 - Reviews: 1 - Updated: 12-20-11 - Published: 12-16-11

Probably a troll but good lord this is retarded.

 

Are people just trying to copy "My Immortal"? If so, they failed. The summary's spelling is too good.

 

Interesting that in the title the word "gothic" is spelled wrong and in the username it's right. These trolls could at least try a bit harder.:facepalm

 

I dunno why I am posting here, just I saw this, and felt violated enough to share...

Wait... Western?

 

Bad Harry/Tonks stories make me want to cry. It's maybe my favourite pairing, but god, it's going the same way as Harry/Daphne.

 

Already been posted. You fail. :facepalm

 

Black Betrayals »by DreamsofPurpleRosesreviews
"Sirius Black is my godfather."Harry hissed, tears in his eyes. Regulus grinned insanely. "No,Harry. Not anymore. You're mine now. My godson. Sirius doesn't deserve you. I do. You'll make me very happy. I deserve to be happy, don't you think?"Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Angst/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 18,968 - Reviews: 102 - Updated: 1-7-12 - Published: 8-29-11 - Harry P. & Regulus B.

 

Well I am suitably creeped out, well done SC.

 

http://www.fanfiction.net/u/2657139/HP_DG_SB_RR_HA_TD_LL_KB_AJ_NT

I nominate that for fanfiction's worst author name.

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Then there is this summary:

8. Phoenix Tears » by slytherin-nette reviews To Draco Malfoy, his given orders were simple. Turn Harry Potter into a woman. Get her pregnant. Resurrect Lord Voldemort's soul into the baby's body. The plan was flawless. He just never planned on falling in love. DM/femHP. Post-DH Hogwarts.Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 33 - Words: 329,640 - Reviews: 946 - Updated: 1-7-12 - Published: 8-27-09 - Draco M. & Harry P.

 

220. True Soulmates » by joytiger reviews
This is a slash story. male/male/male/male. True Soulmates finally find there last pieces to happiness, but it is a long way to the happy ever after. Rating just to be safe.
Rated: M - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 6 - Words: 12,971 - Reviews: 28 - Updated: 1-9-12 - Published: 12-30-11 - Severus S. & Harry P.

I died a little inside when I saw this.

 

Made me laugh. Only in fanfiction could this plan be considered flawless.

Spoiler

Hopefully

 

To be fair, Voldemort is stupid in canon, but... that's several magnitudes of stupidity greater.

 

Shifters by Mydrinn LeFay After 2nd year, home, Harry gets a beating from his uncle. However, somehow he turns into Hagrid & beats his uncle off. He leaves with a new found freedom, & returns to Hogwarts as someone new with the power to be anyone. He is, a SHIFTER!Rated: T - English - Adventure/Supernatural - Chapters: 6 - Words: 20,625 - Reviews: 105 - Updated: 1-17-12 - Published: 8-14-08 - Harry P. & Ginny W.

:facepalm

"Yer not a wizard, Vernon, but we have this parting gift for you."

 

"Vernon!" Petunia gasped, "Let me get my camera first!"

"Oh, Hagrid," Vernon groaned, flabby knees wobbling. "Your hands- they're so rough and calloused. They feel just like Tunia's cunt."

 

... aaaannnd Harry goes blind.

You just know this is going to start a plethora of Vernon/Hagrid fics. Damn you!

 

Hagrid grins, his rhythmic caresses exciting Vernon. "Blimey, it's like a baby flobberworm, Harry! 'Innit cute?"

Conspicuously, Harry was absent. If they weren't so busy, they would notice the retching sounds coming from the peak of the shack's roof, audible even over the raging storm outside. Dudley whimpered from his corner, eyes wide. A single salty tear dribbled down his rosy cheeks.

... I blame you.

 

I'm not quite sure why being a prefect, being in love with Albus Potter, being best friends with Rose Weasley, and being Lianna Hatchet means you have the worst life ever. I mean sure, if you were living in a village in a remote part of Sudan where you didn't have enough food to last the day, your parents had abandoned you at the age of six, you had no money, and the only water supply had just been poisoned, then you could say you had the worst life ever. I also don't think being "best friends with Rose Weasley" is such a bad thing, unless she turned out to be a psychopath serial killer who secretly hated you.