This is a time I'm happy to pull the "250k words already written so fuck doing that" card. Don't worry.

 

I've read through the four chapters that are already up on FFN, and I really love the premise and execution thus far. I'm a bit curious as to the state of affairs outside of the UK though. Surely there would be some collaboration with the global magical community. And if there are other magical communities outside the UK still existing, I would think that both factions in the Wizengamot would try to win their support.

 

I often thought about making a point about the world outside the UK in the fic, but really, I don't think it would be any better. In my mind, with zombies and stuff everywhere, trying to unite the International Confederation of Wizards in order to work on the Statue at the most official level would be more of a hassle for every side, but you should also consider that if there's better and bigger international wizarding utopias out there, the Brit purebloods wouldn't want to share shit. Wizarding Britain is isolated, and they like it that way.

Chapter Five: Integration is now up on FF.net. Not much in the way of politics in the chapter as action shifts back to the Muggles, giving a chance to flesh out some of the Muggle characters, and begin to highlight one of the underlying themes of Harry's character, and the story as a whole. Also, it sets us up for the next chapter, which is easily my favourite of the first half of the story, if only for how easy it came together while writing. So yeah, go go.

As always, I hope you all enjoy, and thanks in advance for any feedback.

 

Chapter Six: Insidious is now up. One of my favourite chapters, because everything just progresses despite a lack of superduper action (Though, next chapter stops that drought, oh yeah), and I can finally show off one of the main reasons for Wizengamot subplots. And Astoria development and an Ellie appearance, so yay? Everyone still, you know, enjoying it/somewhat enjoying it? Drop a line, comment some comments. Will be good to hear.

 

Pew pew pew. First off, Chapter Seven: Instinct is now up on FF.net. It's a pretty good "shit goes down" chapter, and a bit of action never hurts things. To those who were against the idea of there being only a thousand wizards left, you would be glad to know that, given an event in this chapter here, I re-evaluated and decided that, yes, it would better to up the numberage a little, and so I added another thousand to the populace, retroactively fixing the previous chapters in the process. Not a huge change, but, in the end, I think it'll be a good one.

Also, I've noticed that the thread's been moved to the library, and I wanna give a huge thank you to all those whose votes enabled that, and for all your reviews and anything that lead to this cushy little spot. A very big superduper thanks to Lutris, who, as well as helping me out with a niggling issue in Chapter Seven, was the one who started this thread and has been a huge superawesome fan of the story from the start, and for that, he gets all my internets.

Anyways, I hope you all enjoy the chapter, and are all eagerly, if silently, awaiting the coming ones. Until next week!

 

So far I've only read the first chapter and found it to be pretty much like a more modern zombie movie in the first sequence with well magic. I like it that the dementors really seem to be a threat here, though wonder why the wizards can't round them all up and keep them under control like before? Are the numbers too great? Do they not know how it was done last time?

Nice touch at the end by taking away Ron's happiness (because I just don't like him as a character) still too early to rate for me but I'm definitely forging onwards with this one.

 

Excellent, absolutely loved the latest chapter.

 

A good chapter.
Yet, there was something I missed. (Not in the sense of flaws, just in the sense of my own failures as I am usually reading very late) The two previous chapters list Astoria as pending for a seat. The last one doesn't.
When did that change? Or it's not listed just to make us forget that there is going to be evenstall again and I didn't miss (20-1+1)?

Also - could someone shed some light for me - "Evenstall" is that name purely fictional, or were there such things in any kind of vote system being used at some point in human history?
Google gives a character from some forum game "Ashton Evenstall" A supposedly 15 year old pure-blood with secretive parents. (It was funny that the first result is related, yet not in a way I expected it to be)
"Evenstall vote" returns this fic ;D

Never mind.

Draco shines in this chapter - you are slowly establishing him as a really freaky person with some really broken life goals. Zombies in the manor should probably have warned us enough.

Also, I really like this Astoria.

And the pace of updates you have now is mostly perfect. ;D

Spoiler

Because people care. Since five years ago.

 

Thank you all for your comments and thumbs, and a very big thanks to whoever added my story to the DLP C2 on FF.net. <3 and stuff. Now, to address some things:

Explained in-story as time goes on, but I'll summarise the basics here: The Dementors were rounded up after Voldemort was killed, but part of the ease of that transition involved a concentrated Ministry at the time and the fact that Voldemort's followers had them stocked up in their dungeons, as said in Chapter Six. As for right now, the fact is that the devastation of the Stigma outbreak gave the Dementors enough time to break out of Azkaban, wreak some havoc, and build up their numbers, and the wizards soon turning on each other in political fronts in order to decide how to deal with the Muggles took focus away from actually dealing with the Dementors. I go into it a bit more as time goes on, but it's not entirely that simple given circumstances.

Aww. One of the goals of the fic was to write a somewhat decent Ron (And even attempt a somewhat decent Ginny cameo later on), but he does get jerked around a bit there, I'll admit, lol.

Evenstall is my fictional - and catchy! - term for when there's an even number of people on the Wizengamot and, as such, they cannot go for a vote when there's a chance of a pure 50-50, as part of a wizarding superstition I made up to stall plot points and to add a bit of a twist to things. Astoria's no longer pending for her seat by the end of Chapter Seven because the evenstall's broken with the death in the chapter, and as such, there's no need to add her to the body in order to break it. Hence, the little scorecard gets updated accordingly.

I like that Draco's getting commented on a lot, because it even shocked me when I was writing how much of a presence he became - jerky demented asshole or complete boss, or however he comes off depending on the reader. While the monologue at the end of Chap Seven is fair awesome for him, he's still got some epicness coming up.

Hah, thanks. Yeah I find the one week thing much better, and given how a lot of the plot elements require a bit of retention of previous chapters, making the gap shorter between chapters has helped a bit. So yeah, that's that.

 

Right, sorry, even found it in the text on the second glance trough:

Still, was a bit too quick for a retraction. Maybe. Of course I imagine the bureaucracy as a train you try to move from a dead end, but when it starts going it should not be as easy to stop it as just saying "i don't want it anymore."
Maybe Harry's going to use all that preparation to push for Greengrass seat still?
;D

And yes Evenstall is catchy and interesting wizard thing. Even if it makes the loss of member a bit too complicating.
I just thought if there was a similar thing in our world. ;D
Of course we have councils and voting bodies that have uneven number of people attending, but still, haven't heard of vote being stopped just because there are even number of voters.
Then again, it makes sense for a wizards to have such a rule. In a sense.

Spoiler

I edited the name out. Nothing to see here.

 

You know, I'm beginning to wonder what the Dementors' plan is in all this. I mean, they started the zombie plague, are actively working to wipe out the rest of humanity, and are the shadowy threat that lurks behind every zombie attack. They've also been paid little attention by the wizards. They can be stopped with a Patronus Charm, sure, but is there anything they could do to get around that? Unless they're being controlled, that is.

 

Well, they have to be at least somewhat intelligent. They're responsible for the zombies, and later the running zombies, so they must at least be capable of invention. That is unless the purebloods are using them.

 

I think of canon Dementors as something like high-functioning viruses. I don't think that they have intelligence as we would recognize it, but their instincts and behaviors are ideally suited for feeding on what they need for sustenance.

The jury is still out on the Dementors of this story, given that they now make special zombies. They might have been tweaked by someone to create a new zombie-spawning mode. They might have "evolved," for lack of a better word - i.e., undergone a change in their native 'pathology' by means unknown. And yes, they might actually be intelligent enough to make plans and change their strategy.

Of these three, I feel like the first is the most likely, for now.

 

I love this story, but several things stick out that just grate tremendously.


The gross underuse or weakening of spells that are just perfect for certain situations.

Why doesn't Harry use the Imperius curse on Nott to neutralize him?
To get him to tell him the truth and reveal who's behind everything (with details, so Harry can get some actual evidence), and failing that, make sure he doesn't attempt any attacks on Granford by ordering him to not do anything?

Why is the Patronus Charm so weak in this fic?
In canon, it drove away dozens of dementors with no problem
I understand the reason for having the side-effect of it- It adds to the atmosphere; using it messes you up, traumatizes you, etc... but I feel like the way magic seems so much weaker in this fic really lowers the quality of the fic.

Why don't people duplicate food?
There's mention of people needing food, of farmland...why don't wizards conjure up animals (since you can't conjure food) and eat them?
If that doesn't work, duplicate food that's already there.
Or duplicate the soil and expand (like the spells we saw in Goblet of Fire where tents were huge inside) a building into a farmland?

Why is the Ministry in makeshift facilities if building materials can be conjured up and manipulated easily?
Why don't the aurors use hominem revelio to check if zombies are in buildings?
If that spell can't detect zombies, why not have an extrasensory charm up so that they're more sensitive to zombie sounds/movement?
Why doesn't Harry use the Elder Wand? It would seem useful in the dire situations they're in now...

The story is still awesome, but it really stops my immersion when I think of what seems to be the gross stupidity of the wizards in this fic.

4/5

 

Cheers for comments and ponderings, guys. And to address Garden's various concerns:

Well because Harry's not exactly gung ho with the Unforgivables? His first instinct in interrogation was to just question - his attempt to get Veritaserum from Susan - and Nott's answers made him angry enough to try outright torture... but his mind never jumps straight to Unforgivables precisely because they're, well, Unforgivable, and it's just how he rolls. I actually go into it a bit later on. Stay tuned.

You're assuming the "side effect" is for everyone when really, it's not. It's just Harry, his psyche so fractured and stuff that he loses each defining happy moment in the happy memories he uses, and that's only because of the Dementors themselves. The Patronus is no less weaker than it was in canon in repelling Dementors; it's just Harry has a little problem, because he's always had a problem with Dementors. It's different than everyone else's problem with casting the Patronus, namely that it's bullshit hard under duress (As Ron demonstrated in the first chapter), but it's no less weak than your normal Patronus. Again, it's just Harry.

Also, it's either this - the Patronus Charm grounded by Harry's psyche when dealing with Dementors - or I throw in Golden Patronus bullshit.

My reasoning was that if you couldn't conjure food, no way in hell you could duplicate it out of nothing. Also, my idea is that transfiguring of conjuring animals doesn't quite create something that you'd eat. Hate to take a page out of jbern's book, but it would taste like ash and wouldn't fill up any stomachs. Besides, the wizards are modifying foods and stuff to grow exponentially - think Hagrid's giant pumpkins - with potions, and that's about it.

Honestly? Probably for the mental image and the passage about tents. I'll also say that McGongall probably won't want buildings on her lawn, and the Ministry offices have to be close to where the Minister has set himself up. Hence, tents.

Have I said anything else that suggests otherwise? Harry makes note that the wizards have set up magical defences and stuff in Chapter Three:

That would cover your standard extrasensory charms, and if a stray zombie comes along, they die and stuff. Selwyn, in Chapter Four, tells a story about a stray zombie tripping into Godric's Hollow and the townspeople accidentally burning their crops in an attempt to kill it. So, there's one example.

Well because the lesson from the end of DH has stuck? Honestly I don't see the fuss over the Elder Wand on its own; what good is an unbeatable wand if a zombie eats your face? And The Elder Wand wouldn't stop Harry from being affected by the Dementors like he is, so...

It doesn't get a mention in the story. I once thought about including a passage about how Harry wished he could be the Master of Death and see what he could do with the whole apocalypse thing, but that the Stone was lost and the Wand had been snapped, Hermione's idea, just after the war. Think I should add that in somewhere along the line?

Also, I gotta lol at your comments about magic seeming "weaker". If anything I thought I went a bit over the top with some of the things that happen. Ho hum.


And to those wondering about the Dementors and stuff, stay tuned. I go into the origins of The Dementor's Stigma pretty soon, and your questions and wonderings will be answered. Good times.

 

Chapter Eight: Intention is up on FF.net, all ready to be read and stuff. Not one of the longer ones, but still over 12k words so nothing to complain about. It's basically Harry being a tad more proactive in the wake of the end of the last chapter, and kicks off the next arc of his character's actions (After the establishing in the first four chapters and then the run ragged version for the next three). This chapter and the next were once one chapter, much like Chap Four and Chap Five were (And Ten and Eleven were once Eight, and Twelve and Thirteen were once Nine), but the split was definitely needed to round out the overall theme of this chapter, and not just for length spacing reasons. So yeah, go read. Hope you all enjoy, and any feedback appreciated.

 

Pew pew pew. Chapter Nine: Intercepted is now up on FF.net. The action comes back to Granford in a chapter that's a bit more low key, but has some awesome little revelations in store that can answer some questions about why the wizarding world is why it is at the moment. Origins of The Dementor's Stigma are too explored, and I've set up enough to jump into the next two chapters, which are two parts of the same flashback chapter (Once 35,000 words, so of course I split). I think, by this point, spoiler tags can probably be used for the sake of the casual thread viewer, you know, all six of them.

Anyways, read and enjoy, guys. We've passed the halfway point and got a nice bloody run to the finish over the next seven weeks. GO GO.