Thinking some more, I have another huge irritation: when the author decides to go Alternate Universe or ignore canon, and then decides to only use the horcruxes, with those specific ones.

No, really. How many methods of magical immortality/youth are there? Voldemort was supposed to have gone further into immortality than anyone. Does anyone really think he'd have relied on just one method?

Personally I like the idea of Voldemort having attempted an immortality ritual or other such magical shield while James Potter and Lily Evans were at Hogwarts. One of the three times they defied him was stopping the ritual but accidentally causing James or Lily to get the magical shield. This then gets passed down to Harry when he is born and this is what protects him that Halloween. It can also be used as the non-public reason they started getting on well and starting a relationship.

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Harry becoming an Auror makes no sense to me. Aurors would have to follow several regulations about what they can and can't do. Harry enjoys reading for fun ["His school books were very interesting. He lay on his bed reading late into the night." PS chap 6, a whole month of reading books] but absolutely hates reading reports and writing them.

The first time Harry knows about a crime but is ordered not to do anything he's going to ignore his orders and charge in. He'd never fully write up arrests and in general would be a terrible Auror.

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How about Modest, Too by Luan Mao.

 

True, but you have to remember that canon!Harry is a noble moron plain and simple. He would do the right thing which in his mind equates to chasing dark wizards all his life like a good Gryffindor, besides he's not that much good at anything else except Quidditch.

 

I read a fic where Harry goes to Gringotts, calls Griphook by name and said goblin keeps on blabbering how Harry is the only wizard who remembers a goblin's name. Then Harry said "Err... It's on your name tag."

Binding marriage contracts never existed. There's no magic to actually bind them. It's just arranged marriages. Why go a couple of centuries back? They still happen in many countries. If you are going to say that it's backward, then remember that you are insulting many cultures and lot of people. They are not bad as long as they are not forceful and we have laws in those cases.

Modest, Too
It's a good fic which started well but went downhill from there.

 

I dare you to say that to a traditionalist Indian family.

 

What about legally binding? Or culturally binding? Those are, to many people, just as binding as any wishy washy magic binding.

 

Mpreg.

So - fucking - disgusting. I mean, first Harry's(because I've only ever read Harry-centric stuff) a submissive pussy that's a head shorter than everyone including the girls, and then he has to shit a fucking baby out?

Really?

Really?

 

Yeah mpreg.... It's disturbing, disgusting, and gets so much worse if they lay eggs

 

I crack the hell up whenever I see anything about anyone laying an egg - male or female. But it's just more common that men will have the egg-ass babies.

 

You’d think it would be simpler to just grow your baby in some kind of uterine replicator (caldron baby?) than replumb an entire system of organs but what do I know?

 

Sounds like a jbern fic.

 

Idk, I imagine Fleur/Gabrielle/Veela might have a good chance of actually laying an egg.

 

I read something like that once. Harry was a part-veela, I think, and I remember something about a 'third hole' from where he would lay an egg. It was a really strange experience.

 

Apparently you've never read any of his fics.

 

I imagine he's referring to Turn Me Loose and the homunculus therein.

 

Harry recognized him in the Deathly Hallows. Lot of good it did him.

I swear I saw one where Harry said "Did I ask you what your name was, Goblin?"

 

Is it just me, or does that sound like a fic title, in and of itself? :awesome

 

I was aware jbern had the blood anchor in Turn Me Loose but it was more a reference to the Vorkosigan Saga. As far as I'm concerned, there's no situation which can't be improved by adding Miles Vorkosigan to it. On a more serious note, if you do have the technology/magic to turn a completely non-baby bearing system (the male body) into one capable of bearing a child, then you should be able to create some kind of artificial womb with far less problems. After all, it’s the same basic problem (creating all the baby building bits from scratch) but without all the space problems or other things which come from trying to cram a womb plus exit shoot into a man. It's called world building, fan girls. Think your m-preg through.

 

Fixed that for you.

 

My system is already baby-barring.

 

I was being sarcastic/facetious, hence the Sherlock smiley.