I think you meant to post this in the Horribads.

Given this post, I don't think I should be blamed for misreading your username as 'stumphumper'.

 

Pretty funny lampshading of twin!fic cliches. It's not exactly a parody, though. Writing is a bit stiff at times, but it's not difficult to read.

 

I'll second Antihyphen. Enjoyable, not bogged down in details, but still a canon rehash. But the real gem here is Harry, and having inklings of what he's trying to do. Its well done.

Also: actual rules for exploding snap.

 

Semi Automatic »by SchizophrenicBard reviews
In a split second decision, Harry made a choice that will forever change his life. Will Harry be able to survive this world long enough to return home? Or will he lose himself in the process? HP, Jak2 Crossover
Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 37 - Words: 160,905 - Reviews: 138 - Updated: 2-16-12 - Published: 8-26-09

Huge crossover, basically Harry gets dropped into the PS2 game Jak II's universe.

I found this ridiculously enjoyable. A rewrite of this just came up, since one of the co-authors found herself unable to write it anymore, but this version still gets some major props. It could do with a little bit of cleaning up, but the entire story is very believable and the pacing is rather nice.

Here's the new rewrite, if you don't feel like reading the entire old version:

Riddle Me This by eventHorizon Maze reviews
Voldemort's demented laughter floated on the memory of Harry laying at his feet in agony. It was replaced with Harry standing over a K.G screaming in the same horrible pain as the Dark Eco ate his skin. The same demented satisfaction mirrored in Harry.
Rated: T - English - Adventure/Sci-Fi - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,017 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 2-16-12

 

I happen to think that a crossover with a video game is about the stupidest thing imaginable. Right up there with a xover with some idiotic manga.

 

I think it depends on the quality of the game's story telling depth and atmosphere. A crossover with Deus Ex or Alan Wake could be interesting for instance.

 

I can't agree with you more. I avoid game crossovers like the plague, generally because things never tie in fluently and are just crap all around.

This one was just... fun is the only world I can really use. It certainly doesn't stand a chance in the For Review section, ever, but that's why it's here. It's entertaining watching Harry curbstomp people, and it's a great time killer.​

Plus I'm a sucker for fics that have Harry mirror Voldemort and have him still hating the bastard.

Edit: It doesn't read like most/all video game fanfictions. They did a pretty okay job characterizing everyone (Harry included) while still having it feel like an actual world. Patching up the video game holes and such with stuff that makes sense.​

 

Several problems with this. Possibly spoilery, but I doubt it.


First - why is this a crossover? I don't actually understand why it needs to be Harry Potter from the Harry Potter universe here. Not only can he not use magic, but has also been twisted into a character we don't really recognize - almost like Harry Potter and Jak had been smooshed together into one, whilst still also having Jak around. This could be done with any character from anything, pretty much. Putting in Obelix would likely work, although might change things quite a bit. Having Harry in here might draw people from the HP fandom, but there isn't much of a reason for them to stay. And with the sweeping background changes (I think) being made to the Jak story, such as Ashelin's sister, people familiar with Jak canon could also be knocked off track.

Secondly - whilst it has been a while since I actually played Jak 2, and I never bothered to finish it, I recognize lots of what the author has written as directly lifted from the games. This would be fine, apart from the fact that Harry changes nothing. It reminds me of those fics were Harry is sorted into Slytherin, and the only thing that is any different is he's banging Tracey (the mis-understood halfblood), Daphne (the Icy Princess of Hogwarts), and Pansy (who is actually hiding underneath a glamour for shits and giggles). Having a character present who is, essentially, a second Jak has changed nothing from the canon universe. Whilst this might be fine for a while, the plot hasn't diverged enough to be considered AU at all.

Thirdly - my brother could type better than the original when he was ten. None of the typos are completely jarring, ruining the story, there are enough of them to make you irritated. Reading how Jak knew Harry's "excact position", and was "at the limits of hsi pateints" is quite bad for a fic with two authors - surely at least one would have something better than notepad? Missing scene breaks, and switching tense and POV can also be rather annoying to read.

And lastly, is the hiding facts from the reader. If Harry was unaware of what happened before he appeared in Jakville, then I'd be sort of ok with not knowing either. But he isn't. Harry knows what happened, and actually refers to it a few times - "Merlin, I'm going to kill Mad-Eye for his part in this as soon as I get home", which just irritates me, because 160k in, and there doesn't seem to be a real reason for the secrets from the reader, apart from a really vague conversation with a Precursor.


But on the other hand, I did read the whole thing.

 

I can find no excuse for a crossover with Jak and Dexter. Only a step above arbitrary My Little Pony crossovers.

Edit: But admittedly better than HP/Naruto.

 

If you don't look into it as deeply as Thaumologist, it's enjoyable enough.

But like I said before: no way in hell would it ever make it even close to the Review Board. Don't expect greatness to fly off the screen.

And in terms of loser crossovers, you can certainly find a lot worse. They're hard enough as is, and most authors fail utterly at writing them. Which is why there are still thousands more of non-crossovers.

Andro: D.N.Angel/Harry Potter is worse than that.

 

Which is the reason it was put in the "Almost recommendable" thread on this forum I'd expect.

 

Warlock of Slytherin By Romantic Silence
Author's Summary:Harry James Black is a respected student of Hogwarts, a loving partner to Hermione Granger, and the abandoned twin brother of the Boy Who Lived. As trouble arises in the form of Voldemort, it becomes clear why Harry is called the Warlock of Slytherin. AU.

My input: Its a twin!fic/wrong boy-who-lived fic. It's H/Hr, and it has a Slytherin!Harry. I've got it on alerts because I'm enjoying it, so I figured I would share. I don't feel like rating it, so I won't.

 

I couldn't get through the first chapter.

 

I couldn't get past the first few paragraphs.

 

I stopped at the summary.

 

The summary wreaks of fail.

 

I've gotten to the point in some fics of deliberately skipping the first chapter, where the author tries to explain everything. I just dive into chapter 2 and suddenly a lot of crap becomes tolerable.

 

That tactic doesn't work for this story.

LOL this bitch is retarded. One of the most mangled attempts at humor I've seen.

Maybe try skipping to the sixth chapter and see if it's an easier entry point, though at that point the story has proven an utter failure.

 

No, I tried skipping only to discover that 6 chapters in they're in first year dealing with bullshit 11 year old Slytherin politics. Oh and apparently Harry is just like Snape was as a child.

I'm struggling to think of any reason to actually read this story.