I'll see about running my next chapter through there then, see how many people want to tear that one apart.

 

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7693823/1/jO_bekke_at_HUgwRts#
jO bekke at HUgwRts » reviews
Harys twin sister goes to Hogwaters. Shes a sEXy suthern chik w/ an attidude. i SOK @ sumrees pleeeeeeeeez read. THIS STORY HAS REALLY GOOOOOOOOOOOD REVEIWS!11111111111111111111 EVRYON LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUVS IT!1111111111111111111111111
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Western/Crime - Chapters: 54 - Words: 9,936 - Reviews: 493 - Updated: 2-14-12 - Published: 12-31-11 - Harry P. & OC

This is one of the greatest things I've ever read.

This is here profile:
Mi naM iZ Jo Bekke Walker. I LUV Harree Puter. I lso luvv lots uv cull stuff. I am cull. I lik ridin tracters. I em frum Suth Caroleena!!1111111111 If ur a nuthernur thn go 2 HLL!1!!!!11 I h8 nUthirnurs nd gae an blak peeple.

Way to perpetuate southern stereotypes you uneducated, cousin fucking, hick.

Edit: A/N Daryll ur da bes. Thanks 4 edidin.

^^ Apparently this entire story has been edited. I've lost faith in humanity.

 

I couldn't get through the first chapter. Please tell me this is some new form of 1337 or some other such twisted slang. Please tell me this is a joke.


THERE ARE 20+ CHAPTERS OF THIS.

Edit: 50+ chapters. not 20.

 

...

It's obviously a troll story? :facepalm

 

A very successful troll story. It has damn near 500 reviews. That's more than most of the library.

 

Well, no one said that the average ffn reviewer had brains.

 

The sad part is that people are so willing to review joke stories.

 

I guess they also lack taste as well as brains, then?

 

As a born and raised Floridian, I have to say that I am slightly appalled at the way he wrote. If you cannot spell, well any of the words that you are using, than you seriously need to look into some adult night classes.

This whole southern thang about horrendous speech, yeah that's not even remotely true. I don't live in the city, but the only time I ever here anyone talk like what he is implying, is when we are making fun of other media that sticks to this 'country guy/gal' cliche.
/Rant

 

I admit it. The sheer wtf-ness of jO bekke at HUgwRts made me laugh.

EDIT:

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7524388/1/Of_Black_Moons_and_BareFooted_Ninjas

Of Black Moons and BareFooted Ninjas » by TwilightHarryPotterStuff reviews
"What are you doing?" asked Natasha rubbing the sleep out of her eyes and dodging the poking-finger. "I have to poke someone! I'm facebook deprived!" shouted Anastasia. "What's facebook?" asked Natasha, confused. REAL SUM. INSIDE SB/OC RL/OC JP/LE NT/CW
Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 7,358 - Reviews: 7 - Updated: 2-20-12 - Published: 11-5-11 - Sirius B. & OC

And some stunning dialogue...

 

Beginning a New Path

This is apparently:facepalm, THE most reviewed HP Fanfic story. What I think it is, is an excuse to make a bunch of AU crossover smut.

 

...most reviewed? I think that distinction belongs to MoR, followed by An Aunt's Love, The Marriage Stone, and NoFP.

But yeah, it's pretty awful.

 

It's what the author claimed.

 

638 reviews? That isn't even approaching anywhere near a high review count. Maybe it is the highest on that site though.

 

So I checked, It actually is the most reviewed on that site. The top 3 for that site are:

1. The fic from my previous post

2. Dragon Child by Kirkmenistan

3. Animagus Mishap! by dragen

I'm going to think about my continued usage of that site if those are it best.

 

What's there to think about mate? That site is full of horribad fics.

 

I have some stories to add to this list. They're stories that really quite aren't eligible to be in "Almost Recommended" because they're the stories that have retarded ass ideas. Such as "my parents really aren't James and Lily", or it's a cliche ridden Harem story (and a badly written one at that).

First story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/181694 (Titled "Complications of Pureblood Customs...")
Summary: After the war Harry, finds he is a heir to many pureblood families and custom demands that he ‘take’ their members…Harry/harem explicit contain.

It honestly sounds like a sack of shit to me with just the summary alone. Not to mention, his writing ability is just...atrocious, to say the least.

2nd story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/183897 (Titled: Crown Prince of Avalon)
Summary: On Harry's 13th birthday, his Fae/Sidhe heritage awakens. The weird sisters tell him that Lily and James Potter are not his real parents, but that Lord Oberon and Lady Titania are his biological parents.

His writing ability is not quite as bad, but it's close. The idea of this story is just plain fucking retarded! Seriously, do authors have absolutely NO creativity these days?! Harry's parents are James and Lily, not fricken Avalon assholes. His writing ability sucks donkey balls all the same as the last story.

3rd story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/183561 (Titled "Obsessions")

Summary: What if Hermione had an unhealthy obsession with Harry. What if she went to the extreme.

It's yet another fucking retarded cliche ridden "potion" story. Except that both Harry and Hermione used Amortentia(sp?) on each other, instead of Ginny/Harry. Seriously, what the fuck? Authors are just stupid these days. Nothing original about this story. Not to mention it's BORING! I read this dumbass story, and I wish I didn't. It's a 1 shot, except for Canon ending, it's the same kids, except it's Harry's and Hermione's kids. They just have the same names. Talk about DUMB!

4th story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/183560 (Titled "Aliens and Probing")
Summary: Crackfic. How Aliens and Probing helped Harry save the world.

It's supposed to be a funny story. It fell flat on it's fucking face because the author can't write characters who aren't OCC. Dumbledore wouldn't believe this bullshit. Period. The author is a god damn dumbass who can't write a good story. I tried reading this bullshit, and it was just lame.

5th story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/183562 (Titled "How Ron Finally Became Famous")
Summary: Funny opne shot on what would have happened to Ron after he left Harry and Hermione in the tent.

It's also supposed to be the normal "Funny Ron Bashing" type story. It's retarded. No doubt about it. Goddamn dumbass authors can't write humor for shit!

6th story: http://www.ficwad.com/story/181839 (Titled "Drunken Adventures")
Summary: What if in the tent Harry found a bottle of Firewhiskey. crack fic warning may require brain bleach.

Yet again another retardedly written story. This wasn't even remotely funny, it's so bad. I swear to god, I wanna punch these motherfuckers in the throat so bad. It's horrendous.

And all of these bullshit stories are on Ficwad!

 

Why would you go to Ficwad? Seriuosly, they make the common ff writers seem Tolkeinesque at times.