Disillusion, by Hermione Granger
Author: esama
Rating: K+
Language: English
Genre: Supernatural/Sci-Fi
Pairing: no pairing
Published: January 14, 2011 (ff.net), January 23, 2014 (AO3)
Words: 12,147 (ff.net) 11,871 (AO3)
Status: Oneshot, Complete

Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6652669/1/Disillusion_by_Hermione_Granger
Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1149623

Summary:
Harry Potter went down in history as the man who destroyed the magical world. He got a Nobel Prize for it. Essay fanfiction, warnings for multitude of references, AUness and Ministry bashing.


This story is quite unique, it's written in an essay format and it's a one shot of decent length,I found it quite amazing. It is very AU. Certainly worth your time.


Ps: Forgive my formatting as I am posting this from my phone, and my language because English is my third language. I tried searching for the story here and I could not find it, so I mustered up the courage to post it here as I wanted to see your reaction to this fic.

Pps: you guys are pretty intimidating.

EDIT by Minion, March 14, 2012: Yes, we are. I corrected your post earlier today and had to edit it again after reading the fic. It isn't Harry/Hermione. Actually there is no pairing menioned.

Checked by Minion, September 29, 2014
Esama reposted the story on AO3. Thanks to Ayreon for the info.

 

Looks different, and I will even say 'unique', but it also looks supremely uninteresting. I will do you a favor and not rate this, but I'm assuming most DLPers will find it 'less than worthy' by our normal standards. Then again, maybe some of more scientifically-oriented folks will read long enough to rate.

And yes, we are intimidating. Some of us are pretty too.

 

OK, I forced myself to read the first half of this before giving up and just skimming to the end. It's different but it's not good to read. The essay format completely ruins what is actually a very good AU. It turns what should be brilliant ideas and flattens them.

I want to fucking read that, I want to see two super soldier toddlers tear into the forces of evil, I don't want to read ten thousand words about Harry turning magic into science.

That is my biggest problem with this, and with the whole "science of magic" idea, it takes the magic out of magic.

2/5

 

My eyes slipped over the essay like water. I couldn't get into it -- I don't even know if I wanted to get into it, it's not a story.

Not rating either. Or at least, not right now.

 

Looks like Taura has been dabbling with a pseudonym.

Anyways, it's an Esama story, so I wasn't expecting much going in. All of his stories recommended in here have been sub-par, and this one is no exception.

 

I won't take points off for the essay format alone.

What the essay format means, though, is that without a narrative, none of its ideas will really be more than just ideas. But at least good ideas will be good ideas, so I judged this essay by the ideas it offered.

So, there aren't any new ideas here. I don't think any of them, new or recycled, are good. Like the Statue of Secrecy causing stagnation in wizarding society, magictech wands, an attempt at pseudoscience to successfully replicate magic. All horrible ideas that were shelved a long time ago.

It's also condescending to wizardkind, which I don't like.

There are a ton of little things that feel off, like this:

It's a very generic quote, not at all witty or ingenious or memorable. But
in-universe, this quote is considered legendary, and it breaks suspension of disbelief that the author wants this to be a famous quote like a Mark Twain or Oscar Wilde quote. It's a small mistake, but it's one of my worst pet peeves. Like all those stories where Harry delivers an "epic" speech which is in reality shitty, and everyone starts cheering and gets crazy inspired.

No, I don't want to read that, because that's fucking retarded. That's like the story where the toddler-Harry strolls up to Voldemort smugly and tells him he's a time traveller from the future, then kills Voldemort. What the fuck is wrong with you, Bill Door?

I think esama just lacks that filter that should kill these shitty ideas before he puts them to paper. And the Taure comment is unfair, because he has that filter and if he's had dumb ideas he's kept them out of Lords of Magic.

To conclude:

2/5.

 

Meh. I like a bit of surreal action every now and then.

 

This story is actually a guilty pleasure of mine.

Can't remember why thought.

 

I thought esama is a she.

 

I'll give esama credit for doing a great job of replicating tedious academic essay twaddle. Unfortunately that tedium is worth 2 stars.

 

It is an attempt at writing a summary-fic shaped as an essay.

I liked the first half, but then the idea of the magic generating devices went too far.

3/5 for originality

 

It was interesting enough to hold me to the end. 3/5.

 

I hate you >_<

This essay is terrible.

 

Dude, you should write a better one, I'm challenging you, same premise, but as a decent Expository essay.

Bonus points if instead you can do a persuasive essay.

 

What Andro fucking said. Except the essay format really, really makes me wince.

Hard to properly rate, but 2/5 =/

 

I came by this three times before deciding, 'Why the hell not?'
When I read it, I was pleasently surprised, beause not only was it not as boring as I thought, it reflected my imagination in the way Hermione would write, and, perhaps, think. 4/5 from me.