I appreciate the comments and got some nice ideas from them as well.

Progress report : Chapter 9's one scene away from being finished, and needs some edits still. I expect it will be put on here today. ~80% done in other words.

The next one after this then has the Harry vs. Hulk confrontation that's been under discussion and though I'm definitely not making spells ineffective, I don't want to make it so that Harry can just one-shot him (well, without the AK) since that would be (A) uninteresting and (B) unbalanced.

I figure if it takes multiple stunners to take down a dragon or giant, the size and such has something to do with things here too.

 

Here ya go. Bump

Edit: *random derogatory comments*

 

I think that in canon it takes a bunch of experienced dragon handlers to repeatedly throw overpowered Stunners at a dragon to get to doze off.

Also, I'd like to ask that you do not share future plots or scenes anymore, like you told us early about the Harry/Hulk confrontation. At the very least, play it vague and mysterious. Now that scene will not have as much of an impact, because I'll be expecting it.
That's how I see it, anyhow.

 

There should either be a full stop or a semi-colon after him, there (and delete the a, as well).

Typed.

Looking good, although Santana takes the prize for stupidest character in a fanfic this year, so far.

 

This scenario I remember reading in one Hulk comic, though I'm pretty sure the agent involved was for the government (CIA or whatever) rather than SHIELD. Santana is an actual shield member that died quite a while ago in main continuity. (Indeed, practically all shield members so far have been either actual SHIELD employees in main canon or references to former employees. E.g. Jennifer Walters is there, the original She-Hulk.)

 

Why would he need to be quick to stop bullets? I mean, he was behind a tree. He could've cast anything before walking out if he was worried about the possibility.

It just seems a bit dumb for a supposedly experienced and capable dark wizard hunter.

 

Bolded the important part. He's used to fighting wizards, not muggles.

 

The point was that if he was worried about them shooting, he should've defended against it before walking out. The not used to fighting muggles doesn't work, because he was thinking specifically about them shooting him.

The dark wizard hunter part was just me saying that this is not inexperienced teenager Harry. Surely someone who hunts dangerous wizards (and was very successful at it) would be used to preparing against threats. Especially ones that he knows are there.

 

I imagine dark wizards wouldn't be too careful with throwing the Killing Curse around, which no shield's going to stop (despite what the last movie shows. FFS.) As for bullets - well, Harry could put up a shield I'd think, but I don't believe he'd want to show the whole magic thing unless he has to and I imagine that'd be rather visible.

Now, the Hulk's actually more similar to something he would've fought than Muggles - he's like a big non-jolly green giant, eh?

 

Can magic stop small caliber bullets or darts in this fic's world?

Damn it, ninjaed...

 

I'd imagine so, but he'd need to put up a shield or something, which would be visible.

 

Shields are not visible. Hermione walks into one in DH, which she would have no reason to do unless she forgot it was there.

Plus, the impervious charm should stop basic physical attacks like bullets.

 

This is the WBA, bro. Peeps want feedback and if that means being ever so slightly spoilerish then we are just gonna have to suck it up.

Ontopic: Harry's one word reaction is pretty awesome. It portrays just enough of his feelings without showing too much fear. Exactly what you would expect of a posthogwarts, seasoned Auror Potter.

 

Well, I imagine after the whole Voldemort thing and a couple years of fighting dark wizards, he'd not run the hell away at the first sign of a big green dude. Even a loud angry one.

Generally speaking : I'm tweaking Santana a bit to make him a bit less of a complete idiot at the end there, based on feedback. I'll be editing some minor stuff besides, and the FFnet version that I'll put up soon should be the most up to date in that regard.

Any further comments are much appreciated.

 

I agree about how strange it was for Harry to go out worrying about being shot but not taking any preventative measures. Maybe a quick line about slapping on some impervious charms on his clothes and hoping not to get shot in the face before he steps out. Constant Vigilance and whatnot.

It's interesting how Harry had mentally linked Banner's transformation to Lupin's one. Hadn't considered that, but I'd imagine that that previous experience would color his reaction to the hulk in some way.

The return should be removed between the two sentences--it's a bit jarring on the FFN version.


The re-write of Santana's shot is much better, and in line with SHIELD being, to quote random military MIB applicant "the best of the best of the best". Less of him being an informed cocky moron, and more an informed soldier who is fucking terrified of what Bruce turns into, and has an itchy trigger finger.

 

I have to say, as soon as that Santana guy opened his mouth, and Banner was mentioned, it was obvious what would happen. Still, a good enough development.

 

Added a line on the FFnet version reflecting this, and it's helpful since now he can take a hit from the Hulk without turning to paste too.

The comparison occurred to me, I imagine it would be even moreso when it comes to someone who actually knew a werewolf. (I suppose animagus would be another comparison to make, but I figured with the roaring...)

Done.

I agree, DLP can be helpful with this kind of thing too, it seems.

---------- Post automerged at 16:16 ---------- Previous post was at 16:15 ----------

The altered version makes him less of a dickhole. Still annoying bastard, but yeah.

 

Is Banner's transformation triggered by heart rate or rage? He didn't seem that angry nor do recall S.H.I.E.L.D doing anything to piss Banner off. His heart rate just jumped up for no reason when he seemed perfectly calm so I can't see why he started transforming.

EDIT: I'm referring to the FF.net version

 

I'm so glad that Santana shot him, because if the whole Banner sequence was going to be Harry touching base with him only to walk away quietly under guard, I'd be pissed at the anti-climax.

Of course, this sets up Romanov being saved by Harry from the unjolly green giant. d'aww. He should make her gun a portkey back to the carrier, send the whole crew right back to Fury's office.

Fury almost had an aneurysm earlier...I wouldn't mind an encore.

Critique, Harry and Banner's conversation sounded a little stilted. Dunno if it is just because this portion needs to go through an edit which will fix the abrupt and forced casualness.

 

I had hoped you would pick up on that.

Out of curiosity, does the actual name of SHIELD come up at any point in the Hulk movie(s)? At least around Banner. I was under the impression that SHIELD was kinda an obscure secretive organization. It's been awhile since I've seen the movie, so I can't remember all that well. If he hasn't, then the "SHIELD knows where you are""Que?!" part doesn't really fit. If Harry had said CIA, NSA, Army or General Ross, then yeah it fits.