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Oneshot The Cupboard by FranticArmoire - T

Discussion in 'General Fics' started by Dark Syaoran, Jul 29, 2012.

  1. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

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    Title: The Cupboard
    Author: FranticArmoire
    Rating: T
    Genre: General
    Words: 12,467
    Published: July 28, 2012

    Status: Oneshot - Complete
    Pairing: None
    Summary: What begins as a simple trip to retrieve extra cleaning supplies for his mother turns into something more for Dudley, something even he can't explain. He still hasn't forgotten what the Dementors showed him the previous summer, and he's beginning to think that maybe they were right after all. Oneshot.

    Link: FFN

    First of all, this is Dudley-centric. I know, right? What am I doing? Why did I even open it?

    I was pleasantly surprised. The author does a good job in showing the transition from a Dudley who still regards Harry as a freak of nature into a Dudley who begins to question why his parents did the things they did and why his cousin resents them so much. It's a slow change but a flowing one and I thought it was really well done. We know from JKR that they become closer later in life, after the books - Harry takes his kids to visit Dudley every so often. The change happens earlier here.

    No action to speak of or even magic. Just a look at the Dursley's treatment of Harry from Dudley's point of view, and the changes he goes through to - cheesy as it sounds - become a better person.


    Checked by Minion, August 20, 2013
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 20, 2013
  2. Cyrogen

    Cyrogen Second Year

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    Honestly I didn't know what to expect going into reading this; definitely enjoyable though. The whole Dudley becoming a better person/having an amiable disposition towards Harry happened in a believable manner, on top of that the characterizations were done fantastically, especially when it could have been screwed up in so many ways.

    To put a number on it I'd say, 5/5.
     
    Last edited: Jul 29, 2012
  3. Infidel

    Infidel Auror

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    That was a good story. The change in Dudley was fast, but smooth. Given that it was a one shot, that's expected.

    5/5
     
  4. Knyght

    Knyght Alchemist

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    That was quite enjoyable and I found myself wishing there was some more. Cheesy idea, though it's nearly canon, but well executed.

    5/5
     
  5. KingRoger

    KingRoger Second Year

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    This story just flowed so naturally, I loved how reasonable the author made Dudley's maturation. A feel-good piece, certainly, but incredibly well written and very enjoyable. 5/5.
     
  6. tad2103

    tad2103 First Year

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    An excellent story. Very believable character development that is well paced for a one shot. At the end, it left me wanting to read more, which shows how well the characters were handled.

    5/5
     
  7. Captain Trips

    Captain Trips High Inquisitor

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    A really wellwritten character piece. I would not mind reading another story by this author.

    5/5 from me
     
  8. mercuryandglass

    mercuryandglass Third Year

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    That was... nice. It showed a depth to Dudley that was not present in canon. The writing was also well done.

    5/5
     
  9. OneSimpleIdea

    OneSimpleIdea Second Year

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    Enjoyed the piece. I especially liked the confrontation at the end. This seems to be the author's only piece so far, but I'll keep an eye to see if they produce anything else.

    5/5
     
  10. Idiot Rocker

    Idiot Rocker Auror

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    Wow...that was absolutely brilliant. Dudley's thought process was presented so well, that I could understand exactly where he was coming from (biases included). Everyone goes through something like this - the realization that their parents aren't necessarily perfect. Awesome.

    I almost wish I could have heard just a little more of the conversation at the end...but at the same time imagining it as the beginning of reconciliation is just as satisfying.

    5/5
     
  11. T3t

    T3t Purple Beast of DLP ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Not much to say that hasn't already been said, really. Probably the best-written story in the genre.
     
  12. silentclock

    silentclock Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

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    Huh. I'm glad that you posted this. I never would have opened it if I hadn't seen it here. It's an excellent piece, with some outstanding character interaction. Fully deserving of the 5/5.
     
  13. mknote

    mknote 1/3 of the Note Bros. DLP Supporter

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    Excellent. I wish I could write like this.
     
  14. Dnar Semaj

    Dnar Semaj Seventh Year

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    I gotta admit, I thought you guys might be trolling me when I saw the unanimous 5/5, but it was well worth the read.
     
  15. Nauro

    Nauro Headmaster

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    I'm actually really surprised with the rating.

    The story IS good, it is well written, and has a decent flow that doesn't disrupt from the experience.

    But that's just another story of Dudley stopping to think.
    It might be a 4, maybe, very carefully a 4.5 one shot, but it... Why does it deserve a straight 5? It doesn't. Dudley getting shocked by Dementors isn't a new idea nor a miracle.

    There's a vast array of problems that Dudley and his family have in canon, so, when you put all of them in a line, the plot kind of writes itself, and it's not much. The "Oh look, I'm really fat." and "My parents aren't as true as they seem to be." are very predictable and the only plus for this story against all others is its believably of the presentation. (There was one fic where Dursleys thought that Harry had put a spell on Dudley to explain the sudden interest in Harry's well being.)


    The main flaw of the story is Harry. Not the lack of him, but the lines that he says. It's snark upon snark with a few normal lines. That... I remember Harry saying a few quips in the books about Dursleys, trying not to bring mail with a remark, but there's never that much.

    Some independent-Harries do try that, but this is supposedly only a drop deviation from the canon? "Look, are we finished here? I'm working on my homework and right about now I'd even prefer Potions to this conversation." and "I'm not about to blow up your father's precious house."? Very Harry Potter.

    So yeah. 4/5.
     
  16. Celestin

    Celestin Dimensional Trunk

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    Every now and then there is a diamond hidden in a pile of coal. This is one of these diamonds.

    5/5
     
  17. insectamantidae

    insectamantidae Professor

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    Agreed - a true gem - and well worth the library. 5/5
     
  18. Shouldabeenadog

    Shouldabeenadog Death Eater

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    Surprisingly deep and well written, with a fantastic sense of pacing. A worthy fic indeed. 5/5
     
  19. Infidel

    Infidel Auror

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    Probably because we haven't read a good story that features Dudley trying to improve himself in a long time and the surprise we feel after reading a good fic featuring Dudley as the protagonist.
     
    Last edited: Jul 30, 2012
  20. Antivash

    Antivash Until we meet again... DLP Supporter Retired Staff

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    Huh. Surprisingly good. I actually enjoyed that. One of the few Dudley pieces I have. A lot more realistic than most, but a few over-exaggerations for the purpose of its goal. Definitely a 4 out of five or higher...