http://ffcdn2012.fictionpressllc.netdna-cdn.com/imageu/1715129/50/74/[/URL]

[URL="http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7508449/1/Session-Transcripts"]Session Transcripts[/URL] [URL="http://www.fanfiction.net/s/7508449/19/Session-Transcripts"]»[/URL] by [URL="http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1715129/lastcrazyhorn"]lastcrazyhorn[/URL] [URL="http://www.fanfiction.net/r/7508449/"]reviews[/URL] What happens when a brain damaged Harry and a transgender Hermione both get sorted into Slytherin? Snape's not sure, but he thinks it's likely to be an interesting term. This story follows various first years through the trials of their first year.

Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 19 - Words: 115,433 - Reviews: 1,488 - Favs: 1,356 - Follows: 1,709 - Updated: 1-28-13 - Published: 10-30-11 - Severus S. & Harry P.

 

The saddest part of that one is the review count =(.

 

It's about Dumbledore's half-mermaid niece from Canada. She calls him "Uncy Alby" and he transfigures a CD player, a laptop, and a TV to work for her in Hogwarts.

Exactly as garden-variety terrible as it sounds, I tried to skim through it. I can at least say this "author" knows how to use punctuation.

No, I didn't fuck up the copy/paste, it stops mid-sentence. The story sucks but the writing itself actually isn't that bad. Involves Ginny waking up from a coma 8 months pregnant, another coma later where she has the baby and misses the first year of its life, loverboy!Draco, and metric cocktons of shitty OCs. Actually would be pretty funny if it were a parody trollfic, but it's not, so it's a little depressing.

And I was just going to add the Twilight ripoff I found but upon further investigation everything on this girl's page qualifies. I'm only pasting her entire repertoire of summaries here because she'll probably delete it when she gets her head out of her ass and it deserves to be memorialized. Author is xxJLCSAADFRNCxx

:lol:

 

We have some nice capitalization going on in this summary.

Why?? Just no... D:

This author should write poetry. He certainly has the colorful and expansive vocabulary in order to do so. The story itself is also one of the most riveting tales I've ever read. i think I cried a little at the end.

:facepalm

 

8 words and 10 reviews?
What is this I don't even :facepalm

 

People are eagerly awaiting the 9th word.

 

And it's in Esperanto, apparently. Still the best Harry/Fat Lady fic.

 

606 reviews.....WTF

 

What? Fawkes is HOT...get it? Huh? I'll show myself out.

Blah blah blah blah blah said Harry Potter

That is the entire story, the reviews are all people trying to be clever.

 

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2692208/1/Imposter

It is exactly how it sounds. Harry and Hermione hook up when Harry comes home to 12 Grimmauld Place and discovers a hooker polyjuiced as himself. He knocks the hooker out and goes upstairs to screw Hermione. It was never explained why they were living together when Hermione hired the escort. At the conclusion of the story we find out that Harry has named his son after the escort.

 

That explains why Harry's child is named Albus.

 

It's depressing to believe that on every page of latest stories in ffn.net, we can find at least 4-5 summaries to fit into this thread.

 

The Natural Animagus

Author: wsbenge

Harry is sent to the Dursleys, but due to a natural proclivity for cat animagus transformations, goes to live with the kneazles at Mrs. Figg's a few weeks before he is 2 years old. He spends years as a kneazle, before his association with Ginny Weasley h
Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Adventure - Chapters: 21 - Words: 161,097 - Reviews: 589 - Favs: 1,239 - Follows: 629 - Updated: 12-29-08 - Published: 04-07-08 - Status: Complete - id: 4183350

I have stared at this for a while wondering how they planned on finishing the sentence they ended mid word.

 

I think the summary was changed. I ran across this same kneazle!Harry story a month or so ago and it was complete. I didn't read read it because of my intense hatred of everything Ginny Weasley which hasn't yet come down even though it has been more than 5 years since DH.

On a totally unrelated note, I got abused on FB just because I said that they should have selected a better looking and a better 'acting' actress to play the role of Ginerva Weasley.

 

1. It's Ginevra Weasley.
2. It is an 11 year old ginger girl. Where the fuck do you think they were going to find one that had experience and is British.

 

Fair enough. I still can't believe I didn't know the correct spelling until now.

 

To be honest they should've changed actress before/by movie 5, when the character returned to prominence again.
I mean, they did change actors for several other characters, too. It's not like it didn't have precedent.

 

You may be thinking of Growing Up Kneazle, which is literally the exact same idea, but executed much better (and yet still only okay at best).

 

Yeah. That's the one. Of all the girls in the magical world, Ginny Weasley is the one girl he always runs into. I mean, what are even the odds, no matter what the circumstance is.

 

True soul mates make it happen, don't you know anything?