Funny, goes downhill very fast. Kinda like rorsh, just not in 50 chapters but 4.

Indeed teh premise was good.

 

I would have to agree with what you said. I was bored to tears with this story since it has three and a half things that one must require to at least tolerate to fully enjoy.

Real world events, such as well... all of Iraq and the related weapons of mass destruction. Tom Clancy war stories always was a bit disconcerting to me.

Not being Harry Potter. Just wanting to save people is not Harry Potter. I get wanting a cooler hero than Harry Potter, but it wouldn't be so noticeable but for the point after this.

Not being in the Harry Potter universe. Honestly this story has as much to deal with canon as most high school fics deal with.

It feels like it is a NCIS story with one person that almost is recognizable as someone from another story. The writing is good, but that is not the issues I have with the story. In fact, the issues I have are already posted.

That is because it is a spy action/romance story with no connection to HP whatsoever.

 

I would say that anyone who enjoyed The Sniper by DobbyElfLord would enjoy this.

 

Khaveyrim was actually pretty good. It's well written, author knows his lingo, the action is engaging and the romance is decent. Really my only problem is that we have an NCIS fic with an OC named Harry, and I haven't actually seen NCIS. I'll be following this one.

 

Innocent
Author: MarauderLover7 PM
Mr and Mrs Dursley of Number Four, Privet Drive, were happy to say they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. The same could not be said for their eight year old nephew, but his godfather wanted him anyway.
Follow/FavoriteRated: Fiction M - English - Drama/Family - Harry P. & Sirius B. - Chapters: 62 - Words: 395,346 - Reviews: 743 - Favs: 479 - Follows: 662 - Updated: 09-25-13 - Published: 07-07-13 - id: 9469064

It's slightly AU because Draco has a brother and some old Order character survived who didn't in canon. It twists away from canon with Sirius breaking out when Harry is 8.

First some minor warnings which shouldn't stop you from trying it out but might be necessary to give it a chance.

This story is slow and it's more character driven than action but I "almost" never felt bored. Harry feels a bit too mature for his age but in no way annoying Gary Stu like. I think it's just the right way to not get annoying and still be interesting to read about 8-9 year olds.

There are a few situations where your first reaction might be "that's strange", a bit too melodramatic or too forced. The story has multiple character viewpoints where the driving characters are Sirius, Harry, Remus, Tonks, Snape, Narcissa(really interesting) and a few others. There are OCs like Tonk's boyfriend which might get a bit annoying but that is clearly intended by the author.

I couldn't stop reading though. I really enjoy this Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Moody or Harry and even Snape. It has some situational humor which just felt right to me. Most of these Sirius&Harry stories are of the comfort type where Sirius is doing this OOC father act smothering Harry doing corny things. This is *NOT* such story. This is Sirius as he should be written. The characters feel real and there's no tiresome bashing at all.

It's more like Shortcuts where multiple characters do things which mesh together to create some interactive drama. How certain canon elements are introduced into this story was really smooth and the plot never really felt predictable.

It's smart, innovative(the Horcrux destruction subplot has a few ideas I haven't seen before) and it makes you reflect a few things like the Malfoys. I think this is really good if you can accept the pace and that it doesn't follow certain tropes we're used to.

 

I've read a large part of that story about a month ago, up to around chapter 30 or so. My problem is that I got bored of it. As far as I can tell, there's 400,000 words and he's still not to Hogwarts. Sure, the author gives Harry the ability to do some magic before then, but the execution is pretty meh. I like that there's some other POVs, since if it was just a 8 or 9 year old Harry the whole time I wouldn't have made it half as far as I did.

One thing, is, that I made it to chapter 27, and I still have no clue why Malfoy has a brother or why Harry is 'the other boy who lived'. As far as I can tell, it's completely extraneous and serves no purpose, other than the author wanting it that way. There's a few parts like that, which while interesting, aren't really purposeful or good.

I guess this is the right thread for the story. The story is well written, but the plot is pretty shitty, which keeps it from the library

 

It's 62 chapters now and with the wide scope/slow pace I don't think judging the plot after 27 chapters gives a correct picture. This here is mostly character driven but things actually happen in later part. If you can't deal with films like "Short Cuts" or "Magnolia" this might not be the right story for you.

 

Tactics with Transfigurations and Tomatoes
James Potter has his priorities sorted: what he wants and what fascinates him. Also, tomatoes are somehow involved.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,212 - Reviews: 1 - Published: 6-16-13 - James P. & Lily Evans P.

A rather nice oneshot set during the Marauder's years at Hogwarts, which does a good job of giving James an eccentric personality that doesn't rely on goofiness. All of the Marauders are given a good amount of time in the focus, without falling into the usual cliches, and a bit of Lily/James.

To be honest, if it weren't for the fact that it's a one shot and not Harry centric, I'd have likely recommended it for the Library. It's certainly one of the best takes on James I've seen.

 

You don't think reading roughly 200,000 words gives you the right idea of a story? That's the equivalent of the entire Goblet of Fire book. If nothing interesting has happened in that amount of time, then I hold no hope, and I don't considered revelations like Marlene McKinnon still living all that interesting.

 

Author: Lady Celestial Star
Forging A King » Fifth year, Harry's been banished into a painting by the despicable Umbridge. Now he has to find a way back home, and the only way he can do that, is by finding the scattered jewels of the Wizard's Crown. Can his new-found friends help him, or will being with them end his life and chances of ever getting home? Based more on the LOTR movies than the LOTR books.
Harry Potter & Lord of the Rings, T, English, Adventure & Hurt/Comfort, chapters: 40, words: 113k+, favs: 1k+, follows: 2k+, updated: 10/4/13 published: 6/24/12, Harry P. Aragorn

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/8250381/1/Forging-A-King

Pretty awesome crossover with Lord of the rings and HP. I don't think it's library worthy but it's definitely a novel way of having harry "crossover" with a interesting plot. There is no set pairing but harry does have a short-term but serious relationship with a female oc (well characterized, not marysue) who occasionally shows up again in the story in snippets involving voldemort. I won't spoil it more, just give it more than a chapter's read because it's deserving.

 

The Ministry angle with Umbridge hunting Harry's friends to find him requires a lot suspension of disbelief. But Harry in middle earth in the beginning felt fresh though and kept me interested for some time. I dropped it a few chapters after this convoluted "ghost" king character was introduced.

 

It was similar for me, it had a good start, but after that supposed past king was introduced, the story began to derail. I stopped when he made pizza at Rivendell and sang "Can you feel the love tonight".

 

There are so many small things wrong with Forging a King.

Ch 1 - Draco and co. physically carry Harry's unconscious body from somewhere in the castle down to the Slytherin Dungeons. And then they physically hoist him up to shoulder height to a painting. Are these wizards or muggle laborers? Levicorpus, Leviosa? Jeez, it's not looking good for magic in this fic.

Ch 2 - Minerva and Albus are terribly OOC.

Ch 3 - Harry appears in Middle-earth. Our magic-averse author unsurprisingly makes him appear without a wand. Wouldn't want Lady Celestial Star's lack of knowledge of HP magic to show, so best get rid of it entirely. Pathetic.

Ch 3/4 - Harry makes a spear from a rock and fallen tree branch. Yeah. No string, rope, leather, shaping, or anything else. Just rock and branch, and pop them together like it's Minecraft or something. Then he kills a boar with it, but it's largely skipped over in text, I guess we aren't going to be getting good action scenes either.

Without magic, Harry still manages to skin the boar with his spear stone and then starts traipsing around in his boar hide. He doesn't cure it, smoke it, de-flesh it - it should be just stinking, rotting flesh that Harry's wearing, but the only thing Strider/Aragorn says is that boar hide isn't very comfortable.

Ch 4 - Aragorn gives Harry new clothes from his pack like it's nothing, like he can just go and pick some up at the next Kmart he comes to, and it's fine to give a full set of clothes away to some naked homeless guy in the woods. This is Middle-earth, not modern earth. And just to reinforce that the author has no idea what she's talking about, Aragorn suggests that Harry hides behind a bush for privacy to change clothes. Is Harry a woman that he'd suggest such a thing?

There is so much naivety on the part of the author that I can't stand this story. If it was one or two things, I could live with it, but it's obviously written by a very young person.

 

Wasn't really going to read it before, but no magic really freaking seals the deal. It's not even a Harry Potter story anymore without that.

 

I read a bit further and there is magic... of a sort. Harry's discovered two magic gem stones *cough*materia*cough* which he carries around with him. He had Time and Lightning in the part I read with the potential to find a total of thirteen materia magic gems in Middle-earth.

The story does not seem to be getting any better.

 

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

Having spent over fifty years as a notebook the fragment of soul who still refers to himself as Tom Riddle regains influence over the mortal plane and finds reality to be an ephemeral thing while Harry Potter, a young boy of eight, discovers that things both are and are not what they seem. AU

---

This has potential. Reminds me of Hit The Ground Running.

 

This is excellent, I like the interaction between Harry and Tom. I cannot wait to see what happens at Hogwarts.

 

I didn't at all. Harry's interaction totally killed it when he was writing in the diary. He is meant to be 8 years old, and it is stated that his handwriting is poor and inexperienced, yet he writes like that? I totally lost submersion when I read it and just left the story.

 

Maybe its a metaphor for diving into the story >.>