a moderately good one shot, but it is bursting with potential. I think I'll head over the Work by Author's section and check out the second chapter that you psoted their earlier today.

 

genre is what?

 

If it gets moved, it should be put in the Restricted Section probably. At the moment it would be General/Post HBP. It's possible it will turn into an Independent Harry simply because everyone is dead, but at the moment there isn't enough to really support that.

 

I liked this onshot,l it could be great if its continued.

 

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=2670

He's continued it with two sections of Chapter 2.

 

Thanks for the link

 

As much as I like this story I think he made the assassin too powerful. If there was such a powerful witch then why the hell didn't they win the first war??

Heck she did something that Voldie was not able to do (wipe out the Weasleys). I think that should have been spread out over more chapters. Rather than in two.

 

I believe we all like the story and want some more lemony scenes. Deep down we all want the smut but some are afraid to ask. I still like it and wish to see more.

 

this, if you build the h/f relationship could actually be a decent story, it has mystery, sex, and it looks like death, all it needs is a couple of more action scenes..

 

Im confused as to why fleur needed to know Harrys "limits". It was susposed to be a one time thing. This makes me think she perhaps had a hand in the killings.

But then if she knew it would happen, why would she swear her body to harry?

 

She's a powerful witch, certainly, but not extraordinarily so; probably around Bellatrix's level. She's also a very intelligent woman who's focussed all of her efforts for more than a decade on learning to fight and kill, and she's gotten very good at it.

She graduated from Beauxbatons, then entered the British Auror academy a few years before the end of the first war, and she hadn't graduated by the time Voldemort bit the dust so she really couldn't do much there.

As for Voldemort not being able to wipe out the Weasley's; why would he have bothered trying first time around? A low-level Ministry worker, a housewife, and a half-dozen kids aren't exactly a high-priority target for the darkest dark lord in recent history.

 

Man... you really thought out this character. You need rep for that!

I still say she is a little bit over powered. In my thinking she should have more trouble with the assassinations. The reason I say that is that one witch has effectively taken out half the core Order of the Phoenix and crippled it beyond swift repair. That’s a little hard to swallow. If this was a team of assassins or if she took them out individually it would be more realistic.

You say she’s along the lines of Bellatrix’s level, but she is more like Voldimort so far. I note this because as it stands there is no one in the order, other than Dumbledore, who seem to be able to stand up to her.

 

Thanks!

This is after HBP, so Dumbledore isn't doing anything more than fertilising the grounds of Hogwarts.


I imagine that Dumbledore's invisibility-without-a-cloak trick is possible for anyone who really works at it; it'd be the next step up from the disillusionment charm, being more effective at concealment and more difficult to pull off.


Why doesn't Voldemort or his followers use it? Because hiding from an opponent is beneath the Dark Lord, and part of his follower's effectiveness comes from their appearance; the dark-robed, white masked, faceless legions of darkness.


The guys at the Bachelor party were easy pickings; half-drunk (or completely drunk), packed in close together, and seriously distracted. They were caught completely off guard and were picked off before most of them even drew their wands.


In a straight fight Kingsley would have given her quite a battle, but she made certain that there wouldn't be a straight fight; sneaking up unseen and nailing him with a malaclaw-fang dart to inflict serious bad luck upon him, then taking him out.


It's her invisibility that's the big hurdle for her opponents, but it's not an insurmountable one. You can bet your ass that - with his eye and experience - Moody would have dropped her in under a minute. Too bad old Mad-Eye is using that eye of his to search through the rubble of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes...

 

Hmm I guess that makes sense. But it still begs the question who the heck can stop her. As I said at this point the Order is pretty fucked!

 

Loved it. This is actually very good for a one-shot. Fleur is pissed at Bill because he lied to her and is having a bachelor party. Fleur decides to become a slut and seduces Harry. The twist in the end is brilliant and the consequences for Bill and Fleur are epic. I love fics where unlikable characters screw each other and get whats coming for them. For those who like this should check out the author's other fic Gene-Spliced Harry which is pretty good as well.

4/5

 

Uh... do you mean screw each other over or are you saying Harry is unlikable? xD

Will review later today and edit it into this post...

 

Why does this piece of trash have four stars?

 

Because it was necroed from 7 years ago, and whatever Alexx says about a story, you can pretty much assume the exact opposite.

 

Because the general tastes of the DLP userbase as well as what is expected of a story has sharply increased in 7 years. I always take a look at the submission date of a story because while some fics have aged great, there are some in the Library that if reviewed now would get pushed for Almost Rec'd

Ok I read it now, typed that before. I can't really say anything really critical of it, it was alright I guess but there's just nothing impressive about this. It has needless killing of characters, and reads like a smutfic the author was uncomfortable writing sex into so it's just a bit of build up and then everyone is dead I guess?

2/5, it's not awful and terrible but it's not really that good either it's just really meh.