Just read your story Rymrock, and I have to say, like what I have seen so far.

Spoilers for those who have not yet read it.

Spoiler

The setting seems interesting, although we don't know all that much about it. The first question that would come to my mind is whether or not that Rainey is an anomaly with her powers or if they are more common than that.

The whole cyber/internet thing seems promising as well.

Now to the most important aspect, the main character. I am actually a bit torn. I like Rainey and I fiercely felt for her troubles and the situations she found herself into and having to do the things she does to survive on her own. I just don't know how much that is just the default feeling bad for a young kid (she is somewhere between 14 and 17, right?) suffering like this in such a life style. What I am trying to get is, I do care about the character, I just don't know whether it is on the strength of the character alone or just the situation.

Think there was this one part in the first chapter where you had your characters thoughts in italics for one line, which seemed odd since it was already from the first person pov, so, not sure if that is normal or not, just sprung out in my mind.

Also, what yak mentioned about the running and typing.

You do write well though, and I felt the tone was mostly consistent, so, I have high hopes for this. Am invested so far and am looking forward for more. Especially her eventual application of her powers, wonder to which heights she might take them.

Thank you for sharing this.

 

Quite interesting; I'll follow it.

One question though

Spoiler

Was Kevin referring to Rainey by name purposeful foreshadowing? Since you'd established her using a fake the previous night, so the standard "check the driver's license" technique would have failed

 

Spoiler

Totally understand where you stand on the situation vs character field. I think a lot of it is because Rainey doesn't have much human interaction early on and it's difficult to get a true sense of her character just from internal dialogue. Because of that, most of the reader's grasp of her comes from what she does and the situations she finds herself in. The story wouldn't work at all without first person POV, imo.

To be honest, the thing that's most difficult for me is the tone and the voice. How to keep that jaded/life-weary tone when she's faced with the situations she tends to find herself in. So, I'm glad to hear it's somewhat consistent.

Anyway, thanks for reading, Nemrut, and for the comments. Really appreciate the feedback.

@Mutton

Spoiler

I thought about that for a really long time before I wrote it, just to make sure it made sense (at least I think it does). Basically, Rainey's "power" wipes your memory from the moment of contact until the person falls asleep. Since she introduced herself to Kevin before they shook hands, the last thing he would remember from the night before would be her name. I thought about that one for awhile. Not sure I like that, but it's what I figured would actually happen if her powers work the way they do. I guess I could always go back and have them shake before she's tell him her name.

 

Eh, since we're sharing, I just updated my fic.

This is the first time I share it with DLP. This fic is mostly me experimenting with a new style, thus it may be awkward to read in places. Despite this, I am quite proud of it.
It hovers around 65k words with todays update, so it should be enough to form a coherent opinion, though we are still at the early stages of the fic.

I realize that the summary is not very forthcoming, so here's what I can say without spoiling anything. It is mostly a character piece revolving around the lives of Batman and Wonder Woman, and the people around them. I say 'mostly' because while there hasn't been a lot of action in the first few chapters, it is starting to pick up with no signs of slowing down.


It is based on the New 52, but I have written it with the assumption that most of my readers wouldn't know much about it, so no special knowledge besides names is required to follow it. It starts off soon after the formation of the Justice League, and just a couple years after the various origins.


It's kind of too late for me to use the WBA now, and it is bad form to put one's own fic for review, but I would appreciate criticism of any sort. If you liked it, great. If not, tell me what I should work on.

Edit: PS:If the first chapter feels different in style (and frankly, worse), it is because it was supposed to be a one-shot, but then a story evolved out of it.

 

Interesting story Republic21. I enjoyed it, although I will admit the pairing is not my cup of tea. While I'm okay with Batman/Wonder Woman, I've always been a Superman/Wonder Woman and Batman/Thalia shipper. Still, for what's worth, I found entertaining.

 

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2826655/1/Special

http://bellatemple.livejournal.com/605615.html

http://tassosss.livejournal.com/55210.html

 

Fucking DC/PJO shippers. >_>

<_<


Unless you mean Talia Al Ghul.


Edit: Touche, Nuit.

 

Are there many DC/PJO shippers?

 

At least one, apparently.

 

Well it's not Nerdman3000, so it must be you. This is what I infer from you being the first to mention it.

Unless, of course, you meant Talia Al Ghul.

 

Didn't you know? Alternate universe Talia

 

I meant Thalia al Ghul.

 

See? Right there are the DC/PJO shippers.

Obviously Thalia is not Zeus' daughter, she is is Ra's' daughter.

 

After a lengthy absence from this thread, due to the dominance of Naruto/Anime recs, I came back and was pleasently surprised that the last few pages have a lot of stuff that isn't derived from shitty japanese comics.

To further that positive trend, I give you this:

Mission of Civilization

About 70.000 words of awesome. Fusing the Battletech universe with Old!Galactica was a stroke of genius, executing it with very competent technical writing, many surprising ideas and high quality action scenes earnes this a 4/5 despite the fact that the fic is probably abandoned.

 

The Scoop

MCU oneshot.

Book Circle

 

Wrote you a review on fanfiction.net.

Are there any good Wonder Woman centric stories out there?

It always puzzled me as to why the canon writers bothered to make WW an immortal character who is only in her early twenties, making the immortal aspect rather irrelevant. Wouldn't it be more interesting if WW had lived since the times of the Achilles and such and brought her experiences and worldviews of that time with her? It always seemed lazy to make WW have ideals so close to that of modern times.

There is just a lot of potential in that character and a lot of it seems wasted so often. Are there any stories that do her justice? Comic suggestions are also fine.

 

I will write you a reply on FFnet because while what you said can be considered true, it depends on what canon you're basing them off of.

---------- Post automerged at 02:29 PM ---------- Previous post was at 02:10 PM ----------

What it boils down to is New 52 =/= old canon.

 

Admittedly, I know nothing really about 52, at least I think I don't. DC has so many reboots and different universes, I am unable to tell them apart.

 

Wonder Woman in general is a very underused character. I haven't seen a WW centric fanfic so far. Whenever I see her she is either part of a ship, a team, or a partnership.

If you didn't like my portrayal of Diana, then you're not going to like my recs. You're not going to like her in fanfiction at all, actually. And I dont really know of any comics that would fit your description of her, so I can't really help you /:

 

I am aware that I have an unusual opinion on Wonder Woman and I am able to stomach the romances with Batman. For example, I really liked Escape Artistry.

Would still appreciate if you'd shoot me some reccs. While it may not be exactly what I am looking for, maybe there is still some good stuff worth reading there.