That second challenge lead to a Teen Titans crossover that I actually liked a bit, though it was definitely a guilty pleasure thing. It had a distinct "Mr Black" feel to it. The Nundu helped too

 

link it.

/char

 

Here.

Pure crack, but I found it somewhat amusing. If you change "Harry" to "Mr. Black", it's easy to see that Blot could have written this.

I just wish that it was explained where the nundu cub actually came from. Then it'd actually hit every cliche I can think of

 

This challenge has two main flaws, in my opinion.

1: Given that these 'Deaths' are usually forced to take a hands-off approach with those whose cases they work, having no influence on them except once they're already dead, then sending them back repeatedly without access to their old memories, why would Harry dying reflect badly on them?

If I were given a job that consisted entirely of processing a person's case once they're standing right in front of me, how is anything that client does or has had done to them before they reach my desk my fault?

2: Barring instances where someone issues a 'challenge' solely to fish for stories they want to see but are too lazy to write, the idea of a challenge is to foster new ideas, things we haven't seen before... or alternate takes on one idea.

This challenge only seems to foster more 'rewind and repeat' fics where a character's memory (Harry and/or Hermione, usually) goes back to reside in their younger body to try and use future knowledge to fix things that previously went wrong. We already have a ton of those kinds of redo stories, most of them highly derivative of other stories that were already highly derivative... and the Reptilla responses tend to be of lower average quality than even those are, possibly because the author doesn't even need to think up their own hook. And, really, the one provided, that celestial bureaucracy, is more than a little cheesy.

I've certainly enjoyed my fair share of the redo genre, even the softball ones where the good guys are always on top (I can experience failure and depression in my own life) but responses to this particular challenge have a disappointing habit of being low rent and abandoned: Kind of like an apartment in the slums.

I don't have a problem with the basic idea, which is the creation of more HP/Comic crossovers where Harry is paired with a female character from the comics.

The majority of HP/comic crossovers have the notorious 'suddenly gay with neither prelude nor precedent' Harry, pairing up with Superman, Wolverine, or the now very popular male cast of The Avengers.

And, when he is straight, he often gets paired with one of the same old HP characters he's always paired with, which is a bit of a waste, considering the massive cast of characters you add with the inclusion of any comic book universe.

Then, you subtract the usual percentage of poorly written and abandoned fics.

So, more comic crossovers with a straight Harry who is actually involved with *gasp* a comic book character should be a good thing.

Should.

Unfortunately the whole premise of Harry being in Vegas in the first place is pretty weak, and the authors rarely take the effort to make it any stronger. They also tend to abandon the stories (or update them in tiny, infrequent, installments) which is mind-boggling since one gets the impression they're kind of meant to be one-shots.

Ayup.

A larger reason is Harry/Hermione fans.

Not ones like me, mind you: The crazy ones.

Needs to update, too...

Would describing myself as 'guiltily pleasured' sound... off?

 

Are you talking about the one with Raven, twenty-five duffel bags, each stuffed with five million dollars, and a nundu cub? The one where Harry just Accio's Metallo's power source?

Anyhoo, to add to the topic: loyalty/compulsion/mind altering potions fed to Harry by Dumbledore and the whole Order being alright with it. Yes, I'm talking about "Junior Inquisitor". It seemed like a decent fic at first, and then the bashing started. And then it went over the top. With this latest chapter, it probably should have a 'Parody' set up as one of its genres, because this is getting more ridiculous with each chapter.

 

Soul mates, Soul bonds, Bashing, fake deaths, changing canon with no other because reason than "its bettah dat way", sudden personality, mustache twirling villains, retarded death eaters, misunderstood Draco/Snape/Satan, nutrient/appearence changing potions... All of these lazy and shitty tools "writers" use just because they don't the will and ability to write something that makes sense. The place to people like these, quoting the great Tycho, is the word jail, for they are language criminals.

 

Not going there.

Yep.

 

I don't see what's the problem here. The other stuff, yeah, but not this. Most of the time I see it brought up, they're only supplemental stuff to be taken in with regular food, nothing more.

 

Most of the times I see them it's part of the 'poor abused Harry becoming Lord of 20 Noble Houses storyline'. Harry gets given a billion Galleons, 50 extra names, all of the land in the UK, the entire wizarding government and a 'nutrient' potion to 'reverse the effects of his abusive childhood' which has the result of Harry turning into a 6ft lump of muscle (at age 12) that makes all the witches swoon at his passing.

 

Oh, you meant that. Whoops? I usually see them as something that merely makes him about the same as every other kid his age, as nutrient=/=buffing up.

Mind you, I'm not saying I didn't encounter stuff like that in fanfics, I just sort of tend to skip over those sort of fics entirely. Whenever I see mention of Gringotts vaults, lordships and inheritance, a fic just gets filtered. What is particularly loathsome is how suddenly Harry doesn't have enough fingers on his hands for all the lordship rings he got. And while I'm on this particular train of though: having more than one wife/girlfriend or some such nonsense. In particular, I find the 'Lunar Harmony' annoying.

Speaking of the whole 'every witch must masturbate to fantasies of Harry and his broom (nudge nudge)', I always wondered how in the world could Quidditch make anyone bulk up or get more fit. Granted, there could be warm-up exercises beforehand, but even so... it's just silly. More ridiculous than that is reading about how all the extra chores/work at Dursleys made his muscles more defined or something.

All in all, nutrient potions are perfectly fine so long as people don't go overboard.

Now, super special/unique wand-wood and wand-cores are another annoying things as well. And the whole live-in trunks, but I believe that was already mentioned somewhat recently (the last 10 pages or so). And magical familiars being pulled out of the ass (without them being magical tapeworms).

 

On the fitness scale, if you compare qudditch to motor sport drivers they are some of the fittest people around. Not physically bulky no, but definitely fit. If you are going down that road where you actually have to control the broom with your muscles, quidditch players would get quite a work out. The amount of Gs that would be pulled off a Wronski Feint and just average corning would put an enormous strain on the body.

Yes it's annoying reading in fanfics about the toned body, because usually they are shit fics in the first place, it would though still be accurate imo for quidditch players to be fitter then the rest of the population.

 

I'm with this. Chasers would develop core strength and a strong throwing arm. Beaters would be more about upper body strength to apply vector changes to an iron bludger. The seeker would have similar core-muscle challenges to the chasers, though not as often- more an explosive agility, and typically from a smaller person so as to leverage the broom's acceleration. The keepers would get the least workout, though they'd need good pelvic control for hands-free broom flying.

Given that they would be lugging the same books up and down the same insane staircases as well as this more intense workout, I'd accept treating them as more fit than the average Hogwarts student, who should be more fit than any adult not maintaining some sort of physical regimen.

That said, the wizarding media doesn't push to idolize physical perfection, so the only people swooning over Harry's abs would be muggles, and really how hard is that to accomplish even without love potions?

 

I am definitely pickin' up what you are layin' down.

Possibly true...
Are we saying that waitress from the movie was just easy to impress? Because she was totally into Harry's mojo.

Until Dumbledore came along, cast 'Columna Impeditus,' and was all, "Sorry, magicless mud-dweller, but if I can't get any cock, neither can you. Come along now, Harry, my dear boy; I need to pimp you out to some tubby old starfucker."

 

What is with these horribly long author profiles filled with copy-pasted text? I've noticed that it usually seems to indicate a poor writer. But I just checked out a story listed in the Almost Recommended thread and the author's profile was 21 pages long in Open Office.

 

It's the 21 page profile that isn't copy-pasted text that is annoying. Especially when it's used as a vehicle for ranting about how the author hates canon.

Bonus points when it's used to rant about canon pairings.

Double bonus points when it reveals that the author is a fucking psychopath.

I'm looking at you, pstibbons.

 

Oh wow, just from looking at the avatar, I can tell this is gonna be good.

Christ, this cunt sounds bitter and deluded.

Hmm, maybe not deluded completely, as she does rule out Harry being compatible with Hermione in the next paragraph, but still...

Oh dear, she's got a cause, now that's downright scary.

She seems to mistake FFN bio space for a movie theater. I mean, what with all those attempts at projecting or something.

I'll go no further into her profile, it's fairly obvious she's got a hard on, or a uterus-on, or whatever the fuck is the female equivalent of a permanent erection (leaky faucet maybe?), for Draco and Hermione, Hermione and Snape, Hermione and Hermione and some more Hermione.

Just end the silly twit's life, it'll be better for all involved.

I mean, this is the summary of one of the stories she's written, that's Ron/Hermione:

 

Sounds like someone has been delving into the darker side of fanfiction, and they dare call DLP evil.

 

My author's page is pretty long (don't know how long), but it's mostly reviews of stories I really like.

I also hasn't been updated in about six years. I need to get on that, especially if I intend to finish my Freelancer fic and post my Harry Potter one.

 

Dear Naruto (and anime fan-base) learning one style of martial arts is really challenging. Like, sometimes mastery of a style can come as quickly as five years, and as long as twenty. Having your main character "pick a style" and then plan to mix in other styles after you have mastered the first one just makes me rage. It explains to me that you have no concept of a martial art is and no idea of what "mastery" means. Just stop, you're embarrassing yourself.

Also includes weapons.

 

I don't get the issue here, but I don't read Naruto type stuff (not even sure what it is). So, is the main problem the amount of time it takes to learn it in the fic?

I ask because I had a buddy in college that was doing this very thing—he'd mastered an art, and was then learning to mix it with a few others to create his own art.

And yeah, he was legit—even put on a decent-sized tournament in the Portland Oregon area quite a few years ago and did some exhibitions.