The only clue we have about Occlumency being an obscure art is Snape's little speech. He also said that potions can stop death and obtain glory, but he's still living in his dungeon, like a rat.

 

You can obtain glory with Felix Felicis, for example. And you must include the fact, that in whole Hogwarts, only Snape and Dumbledore where capable of teaching Occlumency to Harry; not McGonagall or Flitwick.

 

I'm just trying to prevent a plot hole.

 

Lay Off of Harry

Well this is the first time I'm posting for this story. I'm posting right now because I feel that many of the reviewers have been unfair to the Harry of this universe. First of all, a few reviewers complained that Harry was being too Gryffindor, one of reviewers even called him a "goody goody white knight". And I find my self slightly disgusted with these views. Child abuse should never be ignored. There is nothing goody goody about stoping a woman from beating her child. It's just something you have to do. And primarily, Harry's purpose in life is to protect the weak. He said it himself when he chose Slytherin over Gryffindor, which the hat said he had a similar aptitude for, that Slytherin would make him strong and only the strong can protect the weak. Helping people who need it is what Harry set out to do when he ran away from the Dursleys. Even though she had crossed Harry by helping Malfoy plot against him, Harry will help her, be cause she needs help.

 

It is? How the hell did you come up with that?

I'm not saying that being a goody-good is neccessarily a bad thing, just that people had every right to request a more self-serving Harry, at least back when the story was still young.

 

Well, it keeps me interested, even with my attention span.

 

I'm not saying that Harry doesn't deserve some time to look after himself. However from the begining when he ran away from the Dursleys, he made it clear that he wanted to protect people who couldn't protect themselves, and he has never diverted from this path. Yes he has been self serving. When he went out for revenge, when he told Sirius that he could beat up Peter. Harry should definately look after him self, I'm just saying that Harry has a desire to help people, especialy people who are in situations like Daphnee is faking.

 

If Daphne could manipulate the whole school then her knowing Occlumency is not that strange.

 

I agree with The Demented One, Daphnee comes from an old pure blood family. Occlumency could have easily been part of her training when she was growing up.

 

On the occlumency issue, I'll attempt to deal with it in various conversations next chapter, but the basic idea is that is that the knowledge and practice of occlumency is not nearly as obscure in my story as it is in canon. It just doesn't make sense to me that a soceity that prides itself on old bloodlines and tries to remain archaic would somehow decide to ignore/not notice a branch of magic that allows people to read your mind, especially with so much political maneuvering between families. Also, I had Harry learn about occlumency from a book, so for me to say that occlumency is practically unknown when you can read about it in a regular book is pretty dumb. In short, it didn't make sense to me that occlumency was as obscure as it was, so I changed it.

That doesn't mean that every pureblood student is an accomplished occlumens, but it does mean that many of them know enough to detect when someone attempts to enter their mind. Obviously, Harry could simply blast his way through their defenses and take what he wants, like he did with Sirius, but that would mean exposing his talent as a powerful legilimens, which he doesn't want to do. Of course, not all pureblood students were taught occlumency, Crabbe, Goyle, Tracey, and the Weasleys weren't, but the older, more aristocratic families (Malfoy, Zabini, Black, Greengrass) were. After all, occlumency and legilimency are excellent tools for families that deal in manipulation and blackmail.

I really should have tried to clarify this earlier, but I suppose better late than never. I really do appreciate all the comments - thinking about your questions definitely makes the story better.

-the Jack

 

Another good story, he shows what it's to be a Potter against bullies and helps his friends.

 

This story started quite good but it seems to be getting fluffier and fluffier, we need some killing, but I suppose voldie isn't back yet but will this be Ruthless!Harry when they do come back.

 

A good story, like this one, has a balance between action and character development. We need round characters, and without character development all we get is a bunch of flat characters. The author knows to set aside enough story space to develope the characters, to allow us to get to know them, and to actually care what happens to them. And I would like to point out that just a couple of chapters ago Harry was indeed kicking ass. This story is well rounded, the author knows when to take a break from violent scenes to advance the plot.

 

Yup, but you can never have to much ass kicking.

 

It is very difficult for me to review this type of story. First it is outstanding in almost every way, and the problems I do have with it, are basically just a matter of taste.

That being said I think maybe the story is to adult. I know that doesn't make much sense at all, and as a matter of fact I like it more as it is than I would if it was less adult. It's just that I have a problem with 13 year olds being that devious, like Greengrass is doing. Yes, I do realize that her mother is involved here, but the Harry you have built up is not stupid, he would have atleast attempted to use Occulmancy or at the very least tried to spy on her after she made that apology. He is way to paranoid to just let that go, expecially with Blaise right there telling him that is was BS.

Like I said, it's just hard for me to explain since I do like the story so much, and actually do prefer the more adult ways things are happening. I just get to a point every now and then that I have to stop reading and remind myself, that the charaters are not 20 but rather are 13.

Drajjen

 

True, even the Harry Potter books sometimes fail to take into account the age of the characters. However, I do believe that trials age children. There are, for example, children in South American countries no older than the children in this story who are part of gorilla armies, rulers of nations no older than they. And I do think that there are plenty of thirteen year olds who are that devious, it's just that they have a different focus than future political power.

 

I like this story very much.. more power for jack, pls update soon!

 

Nice opinion, though why don't you make your way on down to the introduction forum and get yourself aquainted with everyone. Don't be shy, tell us about yourself.

 

I just read the whole fic, and I really like your story, and I never read anything that's not H/hr. I'm going to keep reading it even if it not H/hr, and that never happens. (That's a big compliment.) I normally don't like Slytherin Harry, but I love the way write it, like it could actually happen. I love how you saved Sirius also. I love how most of the Gryffindors hate Harry. I also like both Row and Jack also, and that whole thing with Snape. I also really like how you characterize Dumbledore.
Keep Writing.

 

The rough draft of chapter 20 is up in the Work by Author section:

http://forums.darklordpotter.net/showthread.php?t=3621

Thanks everybody for your comments on the story so far, I'm glad you're enjoying it.

Darius_Darkmon - You're right about the story getting fluffier, but you're also right that it can't continue for too long. Harry is starting to come out of his shell because he has fewer and less serious things to deal with, but that will not always be the case. Think of this as the calm before the storm.

Drajjen - You're right about the characters acting older, and I'll admit some of it is a little unrealistic, but hopefully it's not ridiculous. As long as it's still believable by some stretch then I'm happy.

I've actually found it rather hard to get through these filler chapters, mostly because I keep thinking forward to future events and then I wish I could just fast forward. As a result I've had to be more careful editing to make sure the story doesn't feel rushed, and the characters get the development they need. As always, all comments welcome.

-the Jack