That was better than I was expecting. It's a nice way of doing it - "Hey kids, here's some more material for you, but if you don't like any of it, then you can just dismiss it as Skeeter's usual bollocks." Some classic stuff there; I genuinely lol'd at the bit about Luna and her kids, and whether Ron might be mentally unstable.

 

Or going gray in the Wizarding World isn't something to be worried about. I was more thrown off by Ron's thinning hair.

With people like Dumbledore and Merlin around as the most revered examples of wizardry, going gray (silver?) could just be a sign of increasing power and wisdom. :awesome

 

Hey Taure, remember the multiple page debate we had where you insisted no one knew about the Horcruxes despite Harry talking about it in the middle of a crowded Great Hall... OWNED!!!

 

Alas, I wish I was Raine and could pick and choose what canon to accept.

 

Where do I sign up to fight slavery to canon?

Anyway, back to JKR flogging her -verse. Wizards are supposed to age slower, not faster than normal humans. Either Harry's and Ron's jobs are more stressful than one would think, their domestic lives, a combo of both, or just another one of those style over substance brain farts yet again.

At least is looks like a chance the original actors may have a chance at some HP work coming their way in a few years. I guess I'll take that over yet-another-remake that the film industry has been rotting in.

 

I'm going to file Harry and Ron's graying/thinning hair as genetics. Arthur had thinning hair iirc. Plus, it's not unheard of for young people to have this happen. My best friend is 27 and is going grey just like his father did. My brother is 31 and has a receding hairline so bad that instead of a forehead he has a fivehead and a bald spot.

 

'Security' Warlocks... I can't remember if canon made reference to them except for Dumbledore's title. Is this some kind of acknowledgement of a distinct branch or style of casting? I wonder.

 

Considering the shitjob the movies did with the "aging" in the epilogue I'm not in the least surprised.

 

No, we've already been given a definition of warlock in The Tales of Beedle the Bard and this usage fits it fine.

According to The Tales of Beedle the Bard, a warlock was originally a term used to describe a wizard skilled in martial magic. Over time, this transformed into its two modern uses. Either "as a title denoting particular skill or achievement" (think how modern knights don't hit people with swords) or "describe a wizard of unusually fierce appearance".

Skeeter's usage roughly translates to 'right scary bastards in security'.

 

The worst part of Skeeter's columns is that they completely ignore AP Style. I'm in pain.

 

The most interesting part of this to me is that Harry seems to be massively famous globally, not just a British celebrity.

 

So, yeah.

Incoming inevitable FFn fics regarding Ginny being abusive and cheating on Harry with Malfoy, Fleur being drugged by love potion by Bill, and Hannah being an awesome drunkard-medic.

"Pft, it's just a flesh-wound."

"FLESH-WOUND? MY ARM'S OFF!"

"Ah, quit ya crying and have a swig of Ogden's -- it'll cure ya ails right up."

 

You say that like they aren't already a dime a dozen...

 

What makes that point so interesting? He essentially killed the leader of a terrorist organization that had completely subverted the governing bodies of the nation.

There's also the whole "medical" miracle of his miraculously surviving the curse that's supposed to kill anyone without fail.

The fact that he's globally famous is actually canon according to GOF iirc.

 

It's not that people from other countries know about him, that's fairly expected. It's that people from other countries love him like 14 year old girls love Justin Bieber. They tried to mob his campsite en masse.

That kind of hero worship seems to imply that Voldemort was a relatively big deal internationally. If not operating internationally, at the least feared internationally. Which would in turn imply that he wasn't just exceptionally powerful for Britain, but by international standards. Which in turn leads you to wonder what factors led Britain to turn out two internationally exceptional wizards in the space of 50 years or so. Those factors may also explain the lack of international interference in British wizarding politics.

 

Or it could imply he did something else of significance since this article?

I didn't read it though. Fictional gossip rags are still gossip rags.

 

Kind of not that good. And the hype, including the 400 articles I've seen about the "45 CRITICAL DETAILS YOU MAY HAVE MISSED FROM THIS ARTICLE JK ROWLING POSTED THAT IS SHORTER THAN THE THE TITLE OF OUR ARTICLE" is pretty disgusting.

Write a fucking book in the Harry Potter universe if you miss being relevant, JK. God damn.

 

Ah. That Skeeter article made me want to hurt the woman badly. Not really what I wanted to see from Rowling.