Possibly, but Zorian's a nobody. Red would have to have paid enough attention at the school roster -- memorized it -- and then noticed by thoroughly exmaining the entire academy that a single student was missing... Er, that sounds too problematic. Considering each loop is not playing out exactly the same, it's imposible to know just by attendance who is a time traveller and who is not.

 

I might be wrong, but there was a mention that Zach isn't affected by Zorian's death, only Zach's deaths will trigger an earlier reset. Can't find the quote atm though, sorry.

 

You're right. The timeloop is focused solely on Zach. If Zorian, or presumably Red Robes, dies then the timeloop isn't affected.

Zorian's aware of this. If the timeloop stopped on his death, then he wouldn't have been so desperate to completely destroy his body in the confrontation with Red Robes.

 

I'm aware of the thread. I actually had a DLP account for a while now, but I'm too much of a lurker to actually post.

As for posts influencing my writing - it's possible. I don't consciously seek out to address such questions/concerns in the story, but I do try to explain the logic behind Zorian's actions and comments from my fans undoubtedly inform my decisions about what is obvious and what is not.

 

Cool story, bro.

 

It would be an interesting conflict to see... If Zorian were forced to kill Zach to end the time loop early, against Zach's will. Actually, it's kind of interesting... if the time loop decays on every reset, couldn't Zach just commit a thousand immediate suicides to break the loop and end all this conflict? I guess it would become a matter of, "When will this suicide actually matter?" -- a gradual fear of that next suicide actually ending his life. So maybe that's not a feasible solution.

 

If Zach forces the loop to end that way, the end result is that the invasion will work without a hitch.

Zach/Zorian have to do something to permanently take Red Robes out. Fuck him up with mind/soul magic. THEN they can think about ending the loop.

 

I think the invasion's actual scope is small. Whether it succeeds or not does not mean much on its own, a single powerful mage can probably be defeated by somebody else, even if they conquer an important area in the world. Clearly there's a larger goal in mind for the antagonist - a city could have been captured with a less complex spell than a near infinite time loop.

 

I believe I smell a freshly baked update.

 

Like the new character, I wonder if he'll tell her about the time loops.

 

That should be the very last option on his list, considering that she's one of the few people that could permanently harm him.

On the other hand, time loops are the very reason he searched for her so Zorian has to tell her something close to the truth.

 

New chapter.

Quite good. Zorian was very logical here. I don't really like technology in stories at all, but since it's going to happen eventually anyways, I'm okay with it happening like this - bit by bit, with logical reasons.

I like this so much, shame the chapters feel so short.

 

Where is Raynie mentioned? I remember her but not where... The major battle that Zach almost discovered Zorian?

 

Raynie is the redhead that Zach still hasn't managed to date yet.

Chapter 2: "She's tricky," Zach agreed. "But I've got all the time in the world."

 

A wild update appears!

A bit too much exposition and explaining for my tastes, though probably necessary. A nice little heist that left Zorian with some new skills, and a reset for a new start. Probably involving Raynie this time around. It feels a bit like an ending of a (mini) arc.

 

Been losing interest in this for a few chapters now. I mean initially each chapter was interesting because of the interaction Zorian had with his various school mates, teachers and sister. After that, the focus was on what was happening in the invasion plot.

Now? Now it feels like we're reading RPG side quests, where the player is just trying to grind and level up. None of the characters are interesting to read Zorian interact with either.

 

This feel too much like Dragon Age II, too much like just a jumping plataform for the next one and unsatisfying, but still good and interesting enough, just too meh. Want to see what kind of theft Zoriam will pull out.

 

This has been subverted I think to a degree, since Zorian has failed in basically every task so far. Provided these things all link up in an interesting way and aren't just justifications for Zorian to "powerup" these chapters will have been worth it, but otherwise, yeah. I too was struck by the, "Oh gee, this is kind of like the middle act of an RPG?"

 

Upate!

We finally know how Zorian is traveling through time, and he may have found somebody to show him soul magic so that's another thing. It's an interesting addition. but I can't wait for more with the Grey Hunter and the shifters.

 

Ah, a much more interesting chapter. Feels good. It was exciting, and the plot is back on track, I feel like.