Flesh out Dumbledore's fall a bit more. We're nearly immediately told that Dumbledore is awesome and there's a subtle crescendo from book 1 to book 5, with the climax being the Ministry (duh). Then he encounters Gaunt's ring, which is his undoing. We get the beginning of his fall (you are with me, going after Slughorn), and the end (the cave, I am with you), but the middle is sorely lacking if you ask me.

A possible idea: Have Dumbledore's lessons in HBP be a bit more than Friday night film night-type things. This'd serve to show that Dumbledore is actually pretty good at this magic stuff, but his time is coming to an end. This could be shown through things like the strength of his spells, more emphasis on his physical well-being etc, but also by Harry being that tiny bit more confident so that, when Dumbledore does say 'I am with you', there's a feeling of 'damn right he is', and not 'you're placing your trust in someone you just had to save from being dismembered by Inferi? You idiot.'

 

I have to second the competency of Harry. I would have loved to see Harry with a strong desire to make his parents proud. After Hagrid told him how great they were and seeing them in the Mirror of Erised he finds himself severely lacking, asking himself if he is truly worthy of the sacrifice they did for him. Plus a healthy fascination with wandwork would have been nice given his upbringing.

 

I meant to include the vampires in my story, Download. Sorta WoD-esque vampires. Meant to have Harry and the gang stumble into the tomb of an ancient during their horcrux hunt.

 

First off, I'd cancel the whole Tonks/Lupin thing. Not a fan. Would probably pair her up with Harry too, but hey.

But mainly I'd make Harry actually kill Voldemort. Make a conscious decision to end his life. No expelliarmus somehow rebounding a killing curse cop-out bullshit. That was one of the lamest deaths ever.

 

I literally could not agree with you more about the killing Voldemort bit.

 

Remove all of the Weasleys.

 

And replace them with who? Harry needs a connection to the mainstream wizarding world. Actually that's a very good reason to remove the Weasleys nvm. I would put in more neutral characters a la Andromeda.

 

Yes, that wouldn't change the main events of the book at all.
I'd probably incorporate a lot of the suggestions already made, like making Harry more proactive and better with magic. As far as him killing Voldemort, I'd also get rid of the wand ownership technicality thing, but I'd probably make his killing Voldemort more like a mercy killing. Somehow Voldemort would fuck himself up royally, in a desperate attempt to keep himself alive at all costs, and Harry would just end it out of pity rather than vengeance.

 

The problem with removing the wand ownership technicality win is that you'd have to come up with a whole new way for Harry to win... which kinda changes events somewhat.

 

The pity killing would be perfectly in line with his character as well. And it would be the perfect end to Voldemort.

What would I change? Not a whole lot. For a tweak, possibly have him more interested in finding out about, and then emulating his parents in terms of scholastic achievements. The scion of two that thrice defied Voldemort, living up to their legacy and finishing the job? Yeah, that'd be a good read.

 

Well if it has to be kept, then maybe he uses some other kind of curse instead of the Killing Curse that backfires on him and leads to the mercy kill.

 

I would incorporate most of information about wandlore, magical theory and history into quotes at the begining of a chapter. And I would put every tale from Beedle the Bard as interludes acrose all seven books - just so the readers would know them.

It doesn't change much, but it builds a picture of a "real" world.

 

I would get behind that. I'm not a fan of Lupin.

 

Last book:

The Ford Anglia would have made a comeback.

The oldest D.A. members still at school would have gone off campus a few times to raise a bit of havoc.

Cho would not have come back—or if she had, there wouldn't have been any of the jealousy drama injected into the last few chapters.

Hermione would have farted in the bank, and then tried to blame Ron out of embarrassment.

Sixth book.

Harry would have got a shot in on Snape. A single shot as Snape was running away.

Hagrid would have picked up a Death Eaters and crushed him with his hands after finding out Dumbledore was killed by them.

Fifth book.

Very early in the book, he would have thought about Ginny, but then she was dating someone else. Then he gets involved with Cho per the book. Just enough to make the relationship in the sixth book believable.

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Naa, keep the wand technicality. Just have Harry cast a disarming spell that deflects the Killing Curse. And then in Voldemort's surprise, Harry catches him with Snape's Cutting Curse that incorporates all types of poetic justice.

 

Anything would have been better than the "wand machinima", though.

Even a bit of rubble falling from the Hall's roof and caving in Riddle's skull.

"Huh. Turns out the "Power He Knows Not" is gravity. How about that?"

 

It costs Harry tears and blood to find and destroy all horcurxes... Just to find out, that, after he finally destroyed the final one (invent some exorcism ritual to get the horcurx out of his head), Voldemort slipped on a used condom (Bellatrix was not only his lieutenant, but also his fuckbuddy. She was obsessively in love with him, whereas he felt no real loyalty to anyone and regarded everyone as his tool to be discarded, when of no use anymore) and broke his neck. The End. That'd make nice crackfic, huh?

 

I agree. I think it could make more sense for Harry to look for the ways to defend himself after encountering Quirrelmort or basilisk.

 

Voldemort chokes to death on a walnut.

 

This was actually discussed on a website I had found

located here

That actually seems like a fair amount for the British wizards and witches. There can't be too many or else get discovered. That's just me though.

 

I'd definitely let Harry grow up more in between OoTP and DH. He felt like a kid all the way through and I feel like we deserve more of a climax after all the build up. I dont mean in terms of competence, but in feeling.

Smooth out the curve between HPB and DH. Harry and Dumbledore go after multiple Horcruxes in HPB and the're all suitably awesome like the cave. It's Dumbledore and Harrys adventure time, Harry learns and gathers experience, Dumbledore is fleshed out and we see him wither as he shoulders the poisen of Voldemorts Horcruxes.

Then Dumbledore dies and leaves the last, most difficult Horcruxes to Harry.