1. DLP Flash Christmas Competition + Writing Marathon 2024!

    Competition topic: Magical New Year!

    Marathon goal? Crank out words!

    Check the marathon thread or competition thread for details.

    Dismiss Notice
  2. Hi there, Guest

    Only registered users can really experience what DLP has to offer. Many forums are only accessible if you have an account. Why don't you register?
    Dismiss Notice
  3. Introducing for your Perusing Pleasure

    New Thread Thursday
    +
    Shit Post Sunday

    READ ME
    Dismiss Notice

WIP Harry Potter and the Prince of Slytherin By The Sinister Man - T

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by iamnotreal, Jan 5, 2016.

  1. iamnotreal

    iamnotreal Second Year

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2016
    Messages:
    58
    High Score:
    0
    Title: Harry Potter and the Prince Of Slytherin
    Author:The Sinister Man
    Rating: T
    Genre:Adventure
    Chapters: 87
    Words: 514,567
    Updated: Dec 4, 2016

    Published: Apr 17, 2015
    Status:WIP
    Library Category: N?A
    Pairings: None as of yet
    Updated Summary: Harry Potter was Sorted into Slytherin after a crappy childhood. His brother Jim is believed to be the BWL. Think you know this story? Think again. Year Three (Harry Potter and the Death Eater Menace) starts on 9/1/16. NO romantic pairings prior to Fourth Year. Basically good Dumbledore and Weasleys. Limited bashing (mainly of James).
    Summary: What if Harry were a Slytherin? What if everyone thought his twin brother was the BWL? What if someone tried to do something creative and innovative with the two most overused cliches in HP fanfic? AU, currently in Year Two (Harry Potter and the Secret Enemy). NOTE: There will be NO romantic pairings prior to Fourth Year. Also, basically good Dumbledore and Weasleys.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11191235/1/Harry-Potter-and-the-Prince-of-Slytherin

    Greetings, please forgive if this story has already been posted, relatively new and unused to the forum features as of yet.

    I haven't read through all of what has been completed as of yet but I found what I have read so far to be - decent. The title itself can be a bit foreboding and the first few chapters introduce WrongBWL!Harry, SeriousAbusive!Dursley off the bat not too mention the aforementioned SlytherinHierarchy!Politics vibe ascertained from the title. Yet the writing I find is really solid and the more than anything it isn't a straight canon rehash. Interesting to see where this goes. The update rate is also very solid, apparently every week on Fridays.

    Tentative 3.5/5.

    Checked 07/02/17 by Palindrome
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 7, 2017
  2. Six Paths of Pain

    Six Paths of Pain First Year

    Joined:
    Mar 20, 2014
    Messages:
    31
    Actual link:Here

    It seems a bit long to only be in second year. I'll edit in if I ever get around to reviewing what looks to be a disappointing read.
     
  3. MsCalypso

    MsCalypso First Year

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2014
    Messages:
    35
    Location:
    Belgium
    The first four chapters hit a lot of clichés right of the mark. I know you said the author tried to do something creative with it, but it really does seem like he didn't really succeed at it. The Potters come of as very twodimensional and the entire premise of the story seems a bit farfetched, but it might still change for the better.

    Relatively short chapters, grammar is good though.
    For now it seems like a guilty pleasure story. 2/5

    Edit: After reading it completely it is DEFINITELY a guilty pleasure story. Completely unbelievable but actually a fun read if you don't take it seriously. There's nothing to hate exactly, but it's not one of those stories that sticks with you. I'll change to 3/5
     
    Last edited: Jan 10, 2016
  4. Odran

    Odran Fourth Champion

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2013
    Messages:
    3,186
    "Old coot" used by Harry when thinking about Dumbledore in the prologue chapter.

    A WBWL, with Harry having the lightning bolt scar attributed to "falling masonry".

    A living James and Lily, who left Harry with Dursleys, because they thought he would be jealous of the attention that his twin was getting and because he didn't have bouts of accidental magic they thought he was a squib.

    Yeah, I don't think this bodes well for the overall quality of the fic.
     
  5. Baradine

    Baradine Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2012
    Messages:
    267
    Gender:
    Male
    The fic is one I would definitely call guilty pleasure. It's done some things I haven't seen before, like Pettigrew being the Potters' Lawyer, but he also writes in a rather cringy, if technically competent, way. The unreasonable actions of James are also justified in this fic, if you manage to get this far.

    Another issue with this story is the pacing. I, for one, am capable of withstanding very slow paced fics, but I recognize that it's an issue for quite a few people. I personally think that it's fine right now, but I would understand if others would discredit the fic because of its pacing.

    Overall, I'd give it no better than 2.5/5 (rounded up to 3). The biggest plus to this fic is that once you actually get into the story, the writing and cliches seem to improve every chapter. So, if the author manages to rewrite the whole thing once he's finished, it'd probably be 4/5 material.
     
  6. najex

    najex First Year

    Joined:
    Oct 15, 2015
    Messages:
    37
    High Score:
    0
    Wile there are a lot cliches, someting I don't mind nearly as much as most, they usualy give logical explenations for why they are there.
    The pacing is slow but its still good enough for me to keep following the story.
    3/5
     
  7. noura62442

    noura62442 First Year

    Joined:
    Sep 5, 2014
    Messages:
    26
    It gets a lot better after the first year however it's still a guilty pleasure fix. That being said, the only.reason I got through most of it was because I didn't have anything else to read at that point. If I had, it would have been dropped after a few chapters. 2/5 Maybe a 3 if the rest gets any better
     
  8. IBG

    IBG Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2007
    Messages:
    289
    Read about 25 chapters of this and it's just your usual cliches with nothing really creative or innovative done about them, despite the pretentious summary. The only things that are truly unique to the story are wholly irrelevant to the plot moving forwards.

    At least the author fleshes each one out and addresses them individually rather than the usual 'Harry goes to Gringotts and gets a bucket list', but if you've read any other WBWL fics you won't find anything new here.
     
  9. speculating

    speculating Guest

    I agree with most everyone else - it's very definitely a guilty pleasure fic. If you're into the clichéd tropes that this story is built on, then it's one of the better ones. It does still have problems outside of the usual ones associated with WBWL fics, though. Occasional distracting typos ('Grindenwald', for example...more than once), and a tendency not to separate paragraphs when multiple characters are talking without dialogue tags are the only technical/formatting mistakes I noted. All in all, it's not my thing, but I can certainly see why you'd enjoy it if you like super-competent, Slytherin Harry and/or WBWL stories. 2/5, though, because of rounding down.

    ETA: Re-read a couple of chapters and noticed another issue - we spend 90% of a chapter in one person's POV, and then suddenly have access to another character's thoughts for no apparent reason. Either it's third person limited or it's third person omniscient, not half one way and half the other. Knew something was bothering me.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 7, 2016
  10. Armani

    Armani Second Year

    Joined:
    Sep 13, 2015
    Messages:
    55
    Location:
    Not Here
    This story, like everyone else says is a guilty pleasure fic. It has all of the usual cliches. It is also too slow paced for some people. I'd give it a 3/5.
     
  11. Poly

    Poly First Year

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2015
    Messages:
    37
    I won't rate, because I barely got through chapter 1, but oh god my eyes... I don't care if it managed to right itself in time, because the beginning was so awful. And the fact it's in year 2 after all these words is another red flag; it should be in year 4 already, where the good stuff inevitably starts.
     
  12. Sirius_Sanchez

    Sirius_Sanchez Squib

    Joined:
    Dec 29, 2015
    Messages:
    18
    High Score:
    0
    This story was updated today. I have been following now since it started and do quite enjoy it. Cliches don't bother me so much. I only care whether I find a story interesting. Personally I would rate it a 4/5. Perhaps I just haven't seen it or remember it anywhere else, but I enjoy the role Petigrew is playing. I also enjoy some of the political intrigue of heirs and heir apparents.
     
  13. Thormolecules

    Thormolecules Squib

    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2015
    Messages:
    7
    High Score:
    0
    Most definitely a guilty pleasure fic, but it definitely written better than most find that have this number of cliches.
    I do really enjoy the idea of the Slytherin prince and the lair with the snakes, as well as Lockhart transformation. but the meandering pace that the fic follows makes me worried all of these relatively unique ideas sprung from a cliche will never bear fruit.
    3/5 for me, probably will change depending on continued reveals
     
  14. Eric_Stephens

    Eric_Stephens Muggle

    Joined:
    Jan 1, 2016
    Messages:
    2
    High Score:
    0
    I enjoyed it enough to follow it early on but I have fallen off a bit recently, although I find myself tiring of 'canon retelling' or Hogwarts based fics as a whole so keep that in mind.

    Overall a solid fic, nothing glaringly bad about it other than the weirdly abusive Dursleys that seem to be present in this kind of story, I did like the 'reason' for their abuse though.

    Probably one of the only WBWL stories I've read in which the brother/sibling/whatever actually has a decent character arc as well so its got that going for it.

    Overall 2/5, largely losing points for cliche and the slow pacing. However if you're looking for an AU retelling of cannon/WBWL story this ones pretty much par for the course.
     
  15. Pure Infinity

    Pure Infinity High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Dec 19, 2012
    Messages:
    585
    Gender:
    Male
    Hmm... strangely enough, I don't exactly hate this fic. There are many aspects of it that I dislike in other stories, but that I found to be... not done well, necessarily, but done in a way that didn't stop me from enjoying the story.

    Negatives:
    - Clichéd in the worst way. From the WBWL trope (including abandonment and severe bashing), to eleven year old children acting like politicians, to magical cores that exist for some reason
    - As stated, there's a lot of bashing. Admittedly, I didn't find it too annoying, but it's there. There's an undercurrent of bashing for Dumbledore, but it isn't as prevalent as one might expect.
    - Redeemed Snape. Not necessarily a bad thing, I just dislike it.

    Positives:
    - Despite the bashing, characters aren't one dimensional broomsticks designed for one function. Well, some of them are. But Harry's brother actually isn't that bad a person, and to some degree I've actually reached the point of wanting him and Harry to reconcile. Which is an odd feeling, and I enjoy that. Characters like Ron, who are usually just turned into Slytherin haters actual have some development, and don't come across as completely lifeless.
    - There's also a few interesting ideas inside. New takes on characters and situations that actually caused me to pause for a moment. Gilderoy Lockhart just pretends to be incompetent (admittedly, something I've seen before, but rarely), Peter Pettigrew is a lawyer, Hagrid has a cousin named Gunther, etc, etc.

    Anyway, guilty pleasure fic at best, but definitely worth the read for the things it does well. Has a rough start, but if you stick with it for a while, you may find yourself enjoying it. 3/5 from me.
     
  16. Dicra

    Dicra Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2014
    Messages:
    352
    Ahhh ... yes. Put this up in the "New and Almost Recommended" Thread a while ago.

    I did reread the whole thing shortly, and it had the same effect on me it had had before:
    The first arc I thought to be an awfully clichéd story which was quite nice to read but ultimately annoying. Although his Harry was always fun to read about, as he kicks ass.
    The second arc I thought to be really intriguing. I know the pacing is quite slow. I know many things that happen there are improbable. I know the guy's answer to literally EVERYTHING is magic (Why do the Dursleys hate Harry? Magic. Why do the Malfoys and the Weasleys hate each other? Magic. Why are children this age so incredibly well-spoken? Well, I think you've got the gist :D ).
    But ... I like it, because he manages to create very interesting characters that have - admittedly - nothing to do with canon but are fascinating on their own, and he always manages to leave you with unanswered questions for which you only get a few hints at the time. Additionally, the guy seems to have a pretty good idea where he wants to go, and his update-rate is very stable, which is always a plus in my book.
    Apart from that, the writing is quite good.

    So, 2/5 for the first year.
    4/5 for the second year.
    He just has to finally come to a conclusion with this pranking war I will eventually get tired of.
     
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2016
  17. iamnotreal

    iamnotreal Second Year

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2016
    Messages:
    58
    High Score:
    0
    I think I agree with Dicra for the most part; I finally have managed to read through all of what has been written and ultimately have been impressed more often than not. The first story I admit in the beginning is an exercise in patience for those who can't stand cliche's, yet almost all have grounds within the framework of the story and have 'reasonable' explanations, at least upfront. The overall execution of them still needs to be seen. Nonetheless it has a dragging and meandering pace for the most part inter spaced with a few exciting moments, in particular the confrontation with Voldemort in the finale veers wildly and the introduction of the knowledge of the prophecy serves as a strong catalyst to character's actions, particularly Jim's in the second book.

    The second book however unlike the first aside from the obvious plot point of any second year fic bears little resemblance to straight canon rehash. Many different plots and character representations are brought into play creating an interesting and far more intriguing story than the first one. Most notably many of the secondary characters are being fleshed out beyond a narrow 1-dimensional cut out present in many other fics of this genre. Very interested to see where it's heading now.

    Also of note is that apparently the second book will be completed by February, less than 10 updates to go.

    HP & The Prince Of Slytherin: 2.5-3/5
    HP & The Secret Enemy: 4/5
     
  18. Grubdubdub

    Grubdubdub Supreme Mugwump

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2008
    Messages:
    1,604
    Is it possible to skip the first book and still understand and like the second one?
     
  19. Dicra

    Dicra Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2014
    Messages:
    352
    No, I fear that wouldn't work.

    You could try, but the Prince's Lair and most of the relationships are established in the first year. And especially Jim's development is heavily builded upon the final confrontation with Voldemort (which is, at least in my book, the best part of year 1).
     
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2016
  20. IBG

    IBG Seventh Year

    Joined:
    Nov 11, 2007
    Messages:
    289
    After reading the rest I almost want to say this is really good. I really like some aspects of this story and it definitely improved tremendously from chapter 25 or wherever I originally read up to.

    The characters mostly have depth, Pettigrew, Lockhart and even Lucius/Narcissa and some other minor characters are still very interesting to read about. The lore about past great wizards and the achievements of some Death Eaters like the Toymaker was also very cool.

    Unfortunately the thought put into making them seem normal only makes the flatness of James, Lily and Jim's characters that much more unbelievable. I also dislike the way the author starts out using canon events like Lockhart's quiz and the cornish pixies then completely changes them as if he's trying to show himself to be a better writer than JK. It's like he has an inferiority complex and is trying to prove something.

    Lifting my rating to 3/5, the story has enough unique things going for it to make it worth reading, but its bogged down by its pretentiousness and the fact that some characters and plots are unbelievably contrived to suit the themes of the story.
     
Loading...