Does the story get better than the first few chapters?

 

Yes. In my opinion, the prologue and the first couple of chapters really doesn't do the rest justice.

 

I don't know...

 

Right, so I've read this up to the 10th chapter. I must say that it is quite good. The characterization is progressing well, there is just enough tell to explain things with enough show to keep me reading. There are few problems with the tecnical aspects of the writing.

That said, I'm somewhat peeved at the use of Lord this and Lord that. Seriously if everyone was a Lord having a Lord Voldemort would be hardly special. The inheritance rules seem somewhat contrived, and there is the whole Slytherin!Harry hates Twin!BWL cliche. Thankfully it is executed well and doesn't make me want to run from the room screaming.

Overall I give this a 4/5, actually it probably is a 3 (and a fraction)/5 but this fic deserves the round up.

 

I dislike the concept of Parseltongue being an ability one is able to learn. Like, really dislike. But as it doesn't seem important now, I like the new chapter despite that.
Especially the final revelation at the end.

Apart from that, I am really excited to see how the hell the author wants to find a proper ending for such a number of interesting plotlines.

 

Spoiler

I thought it was always too obvious that Ron is possessed by the Diary... I think he made it quite clear throughout the previous chapters, the overt reveal does nothing but annoy me

On a side note can anyone notify me on how to properly develop a spoiler tag, it's not on the UI panel in advanced reply for me.

Thank you, Pure.

 

Spoiler

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[spoiler]Text goes here.[/spoiler]

 

Well, could've always been misleading tactics. Apart from that, my post is missing an "s", I also meant that part with Wilkes.

 

The monumental stupidity of James in this story is definitely annoying. He seems to be the only really dumb character in the whole universe and that bothers me quite a lot.

However, some parts, like Jim's little rebellion, were quite amusing to read. But I don't feel like the 10k words were necessary for that amount of content - 3-4k would've been enough to cover the important points.

 

My thoughts are a bit scattered, I just woke up and have finished reading the late chapter so please excuse inconsistencies

This whole chapter I felt was rather tedious. Copious scene changes lead to the chapter really going nowhere and thus the narrative is still lagging. Despite the crawling pace here, the small bits of character building were interesting to see come to light, specifically Lily's actions towards the Dursley's. Ouch! Lucius' moment with Draco and their... well I guess evolving perspectives towards the Muggle world were also nice; it's good to see characters being fleshed out and capable of becoming more than caricatures.

Although this has been covered before it is worth pointing out. All the nuanced interaction between the supporting characters only serve to highlight the ridiculousness that is James Potter. Yes. His actions are moderately understandable UP. TO. A. POINT. However they are going well beyond the believable and he is deservedly beginning to alienate all of his allies as they wake up to the sheer ridiculousness that is his mentality that is still being perpetuated time and time again.

I hope the pace begins to pick up after break ends.

 

Just caught up on this. Honestly I hate Lily so much more than James in this story because she seems to be much more aware of just how wrong everything is but just rolls with it for no good reason.

I have no idea what the end goal for what happens with the Potter's is meant to be, if Harry is still feeling guilty over Jim just being seen as a dark wizard.

The story reminds me of 0800-Rent-A-Hero in a lot of ways, Harry just isn't as ruthless as I'd expect him to be and I'm feeling like the juicy revenge I'm waiting for is going to end up not happening because the Potter's mistreatment will be explained away by a combination of about 5 different unexpected magical effects and creatures that will be revealed and explained right at the end.

I've never felt this way about a story before - I'm not really enjoying it at all anymore, but I'm still going to read it to completion because I feel like I'm committed and I genuinely want to know how it ends.

 

I find myself liking the most part of the new chapter, but if this really ends in Voldemort memory-charming Hogwarts in thinking Tom Riddle is harmless, I don't think he is going to be able to make that seem plausible at all.
And it goes in that direction...

 

It does look like it's heading.that way but what would be the point in erasing everyone's memor of Tom Riddle? It doesn't seem like it would impact the story in anyway. Although I suppose it would make the horcruxes harder to find seeing as there would be no connection to Riddle. That's if horcruxes are even relevant here.

 

And i was just about to make a post about this chapter. This fic is doing some interesting things with Memory. Dumbledore being unable to connect Voldemort with Tom Riddle. Its almost on the same level as Project Mysterio research into Nargles and how Lockhart found an old school book from a protected vault, that has entries that talks about them with notes scribbled in his own hand, but he is unable to remember ever writing them. Nor how other editions of the same book have no such enties.

Also the Wheels within Wheels of plots going on in Slytherin, is running nicely.

 

I have to say I'm enjoying how this story plays out. When the summary says the author is doing something creative and innovative, it's actually true. Sure there are weaker parts here and there, but overall it's refreshing to read a story with a new take, on well everything.

 

I'll refrain from commenting on what's been occurring generally in the past few chapters since we're so close to the end and I will write something taking into everything into account then.

That being said, I really enjoyed the interplay between Ginny & Amy and how they're essentially just stringing the other Slytherin's along... The line where they talked about how a '14 year old could be such a criminal mastermind' feels like a jab against all other stories where children routinely develop and execute successful plans against adults whom should be far superior. It's nice to see such plans laughably ineffective; undone by something as simple as good acting and false expectations.

 

But isn't it somewhat contradictory when it of all is the 11-yearold that manages to outsmart the 14-yearold wannabe Dark Lord?

 

Certainly, however it is a far cry from the 11 year old outsmarting the adult wizard. It felt far more plausible to me despite the three year gap because of the innate simplicity of their duplicity. No verbose speeches or 'grand' political acts; just a bit of acting to support your friends. I feel like THIS type of behavior would be capable of relatively intelligent 11 year olds.

 

New Chapter up today, brings a greater level of interest as Harry sits down with team Mysterio. Further the theme of Memory comes into play again, when Harry recognizes Luna quoting Oscar Wilde and her asking if he remember when he read Oscar Wilde given that admitted to being less than studious while in grade school.

Also Flitwick brings up a moment from Gilderoy's time in school, that he seems to not remember.

Given what we know of canon, few fics offer any real surprise, however the Prince of Slytherin does manage to generate a sense of intrigue and suspense as it makes its journey. It feels like something big is around the corner

 

I'm not sure I like the idea of magic being able to determine anything, but - fuck that I was literally glued to my laptop while reading the new chapter.
One of the most fascinating - although not really canon-compliant - forays into the vast fields of magic. And it was definitely already planned right from the start.
And what I think to be one of the best chapters I've ever read.

Yeah, James Potter-bashing is still annoying and yes, the Harry-Jim interactions seem inconsistent (although I thought them to be understandable), but ... yeah. Read for yourselves.
Some more chapters like that and I might give 5/5, but I really don't want to do that with a story which's beginning literally consists of flaws.