Exception #2 - The motorcycle may also be used to close portals to Hell.

 

Exception #3 - The motorcycle may also be used to open portals to hell, but the trip is one way and permanent .

***New Submissions***

1. Harry Potter shall not be related to Chuck Norris in any way, shape or form. Nor shall he ever learn from or be apprenticed to the master of the slow-mo roundhouse kick Texas Ranger.

2. Chuck Norris (Or Walker, Texas Ranger) may be used to torture Harry Potter, or any other character.

Addendum to earlier law:

-Characters may not perform the "anime sweat-drop" unless jinxed to do so.

 

Characters shall never perform the "anime sweat-drop". This isn't an anime, people.

 

Harry shall NEVER EVER come into possesion of any type of music listening and/or making device unless it is one of those big foot controlled keyboards in malls as seen in the movie big with tom hanks.

 

Addendum: No writer shall EVER get specific about harrys 'Type' Of Music, nor shall any author write more than a meduim leangth paragraph describing what he is wearing, Store names and clothing brands are NEVER to Be Mentioned.

 

Translation: Harry Potter may not be written as a metrosexual?:?:

 

-Death Eaters are not automatically gay. If they are racist against lineage, they're murderous against homosexuals.

-Should Harry ever remember a past life, Ginny Weasley will not be his past wife.

-The following line is never to be used: "Harry sucked Cho's massive cock wildly, her cum streaming out of the sides of his mouth."

-Lily Potter is a muggleborn. Deal with it.

-The homosexual population is low. Very low. So much so that it is improbable that two gay boys will ever encounter each other in Hogwarts and be automatically attracted to each other.

-Harry's magic shall never be robbed of him. Neither will it "All be a dream."

-Harry cannot commit suicide. This is due to the fact that the prophecy states that only Voldemort may kill him.

-If three paragraphs take up an window in FF.net, you need to learn proper spacing.

 

Amemndment: Harry will not try to commit suicide, because he isn't a stupid, attention-seeking emo. If he has crippling problems, he'll deal with them and cripple the problem-makers.

 

ROTFLMFAO! Loved this! Being a recent convert to HP fanfics and not initially knowing ahead of timewhich sites specialize in the routine violations of the directives listed above, I know they're going to be absolutely indispensable in evaluating the overall content of the fics on said sites (based on summaries alone, some of which manage to record multiple violations). I'm only sorry I didn't run across it sooner.

 

Harry Potter shall never again be deemed "short". A significant height change was noted in canon.

Harry Potter shall heretofore cease to be written as if to lack magical power, even canon has shown that he is exceptionally powerful. Let's be honest, he beat Lord Voldemort in a contest of raw magical power at 14. 'Nuff said.

 

I hate to break it to you, but that wasn't a contest of raw magical power.

Will power seems more likely.

 

I think in that case they may have been one in the same. It obviously was a magical connection that Voldemort was expecting to best Harry in. When dealing with a situation like that where one must will the 'beads' into another's wand, it requires a command of the magic at work. Both Harry and Voldemort were concentrating very hard, and in the end, Harry had more control of the magic. Whether or not it was the deciding factor, power did play a role. It was Harry and Tom pushing against each other on opposite ends of a magical cord.

I do concede that it was probably mostly a battle of willpower, but that still says a lot about Harry's capabilities. There are, of course, other instances that help my original point.

 

How about these rules:

#1 - Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort shall never be gays. Deal with it.

#2 - Harry Potter and Lord Voldemort shall never be "friends". (They might "work together" if Lord Voldemort taught Harry Potter himself since he was young for instance.)

#3 - Herman Granger and Harry Potter should never be together, Herman is too much of a nagging little grading sucker for Harry Potter to deal with.

#4 - In the instances of "Evil Harry Potter", mentioned Harry Potter should never "return to the light" after being betrayed and/or having strong enough hatred to turn evil.

#5 - If Harry Potter becomes the next Dark Lord, he "must" be better than Lord Voldemort, not be a whiny little bitchy Dark Lord. Mentioned Harry Potter should "stay" evil, no remorse or no reacting to what he does except evil cackling!

#6 - If Harry Potter's friends die in battle, it always must be Ronald Weasley dying first because of stupidity, not nobility.

#7 - Harry Potter should never be a spineless little whelp and let everyone control him.

#8 - If mentioned Harry Potter becomes a Dark Lord, said Dark Lord will always torture Snivillus Snape first for all the shit he put said Dark Lord through in school.

#9 - Said Severus Snape will always be Death Eater scum, not a fluffy pink bunny rabbit that marries Herman Granger (unless forced), and said married couple will never fall in love.

#10 - FanFiction should never ever have Albus Dumbledore marry Professor Minnie! Thinking about an old married couple is nasty images for people's minds!

Thats all the ones I can think of at the moment...

Richard.

 

Read the first post at the very least before posting in a thread. Doing that will help you survive, believe me.

... I thought this was obvious (and I thought there was a rule pertaining to it already, but apparently I was wrong). Also, you repeated yourself multiple times. Next time don't get so excited... take a step back, breathe, read over what you've written, then either delete it and start over or go out on a limb and post it.

Close, but no cigar.

Read the thread, or at least think of something that you're 72% sure hasn't been said before.

Atleast use their canon names... jeebus. Seeing someone on this forum write "Minnie" nearly gave me a heart attack.

...~_~ come on, please. Can't you be the least bit creative? This is DARKlordpotter, of course he's not going to be somebody's bitch.

and now for your only valid submission...

 

I would think thats fucking obvious. It helps to read the original Potter law first as this is in the original Potter Law. Perhaps if you could READ the damn original topic then posting it may help you *gasp* look more intelligent. Clearly that was not your goal in this post.

Idk about me but this rule was also very clear from the start. If you would take the time to just look up the original intent of the Potter Law, you'll find this law. Ignorance is not an excuse for stupidity.

Are you fucking insane? Using Professor "Minnie"? What are you, some H/G fan? Just STFU and think before posting. Enough said...

Ok, enough ranting about your stupidity. I'm sure you meant well and I'm sure I'll regret making this post later when I'm more calm but we all do shit we wish we can take back. I at least commend you for having the balls to post here and make suggestions, but READ the damn topic and original laws first before deciding what must be added.

 

lol Thank you for the "balls" compliment at least. I didn't read "alll" the pages here, but I read the first one in any case. I just wrote whatever was on the top of my head...besides...you thought it might'a been funny maybe! I'll come up with some other crap in any case..."some" people will find these rules (any rule, not just mine) pretty funny on the first page.

As for my 10th rule, I never liked Ron or Herman, I always hated their characters because of their stupidity. Course as you all know, Ron's a complete moron and is pretty dimwitted, he aint the brightest crayon in the box, and honestly, it aint that damn hard to figure out women! You gotta be retarded not to.

As for Herman, everyone knows she's "supposed" to be clever, she's obsessed with house-elf rights (without reading anything on them first, might I add!), she thinks she's smarter than everyone, thinks she's above everyone else "because" of that, she thinks Dumbles is never wrong, finally, but not least, she always thinks books are never wrong...thats all for now...

Richard.

Edit: No, I am not a H/G fan...I used to be a very big one about a year or two ago, but not anymore. I would rather see Potter with someone else rather than that obsessed little girl, Ginny. And I never ever want to see Potter with Herman either! UGH! Nasty shit...

 

If you fucking read the first fucking page, you would fucking know that these have already been said.

It's Hermione, and Dumbledore. Not fucking Dumbles and Herman.

Everything you have said about Dumbledore, Ron, and Hermione; we already fucking know. Go to the character bashing thread and do your rants there. You'll already see Hermione has been pretty bashed.

 

*snorts* Give the man a fucking cookie. I call Granger that cuz it fits her. Everyone thats a big HP fan knows "Dumbles" is Dumbledore. Obviously you've got no sense of humor...

And its obvious everyone would bash Granger...she's pretty retarded obviously.

Not ganna say anything else with someone's IQ is plainly not high...and if you take offense to it, *rolls eyes* woopty doo.

Richard.

 

Have you ever heard of a DLP-ism? If you go check like a noob should, you would know that we already know about Herman. We also know about Dumbles. To use it once or twice in a post when you are talking about them; who cares. But for every mention of them you use that term in order to make you point even more fucking obvious is stupid.

First, it is going to, or gonna. Not ganna, fucktard. Also, it should be, "say anything else when someone's IQ is plainly not high". If you are going to be lazy at least do it right.

I have a very good sense of humor, as well. I like comedy, go to comedy clubs when I have the chance, and regularly listen to comedy podcasts.

And no, we don't all bash Granger because she is retarded; which is apparently obvious. We bash her for a multitude of reasons and actually state them instead of simply saying we do.

One more thing; it is because, not cuz, faggot.