I do what I can... I salute another Man who has had to endure it for the opposite sex!

We are bretherin in our shared suffering.

Which was the most hilarious part for you. For me it was when he actually said " I feel very protective of you..."

I let out a very audible snort.

 

It wasn't so much any specific part that was the funniest as it was anytime Bella spoke and Edward ordered her around like his bitch and the squealing teen girls lapped it up when if a real man talked to them like that he'd be in handcuffs within ten minutes.

 

or with a face full of pepper spray and an aching pain in your balls.

Its a little fascinating to watch their reactions to it in comparisons to the shocked and mildy disgusted faces of the guys who go to see the movie with them.

I'm no faminazi but even I was disturbed by this movie.

I swear venting on this movie is more entertaining than actually watching some parts of it.

 

Hey, I still like both . . . But guys are just as bad (in different ways).

The entire premise of Twilight is great because all the feminists who like it are too stupid to realize that their liking it refutes their own philosophy.

 

I read the first book. Of course, I'll read anything so that's not a big deal. I could not make myself read the last three. I've seen fan fictions with better writing and plots. I cannot understand how anyone could possibly like any of the three major idiots, err, characters in this series.

One idiot girl, so completely clueless that I wanted to have a CAT scan or an MRI done to see if there actually was activity in her skull.

One pedophile vampire, more than 100 years old, who seems to be freaking out over that same brainless wonder. What could they ever talk about? I have very little in common with my oldest brother and he's only 23 years older than I am. With a gulf spanning a century, do they have anything in common at all? Not to mention, I hate the whole vampire/mortal love story thing in the first place. Mortals are either tools or food to a vampire. You don't screw your hammer or your big mac unless you are just too freaky for words. Eddies a vegetarian, you say, drinks nothing but animal blood?

Let's lock Eddie and bimbo in a room for a week and see how long that lasts.

And don't even get me started on that insult to all werewolves. Stephenie Meyer should have stuck with writing a straight romance novel and left the half-understood fantasy elements at home or in her dreams.

On a more personal side, if anybody, male or female tried to treat me like eddie treats bimbo, I would plant a size six foot in their rear hard enough for them to taste shoelaces.

Raven

 

I love the morals of the books though:

1. Never EVER have sex before you are married.
2. A woman can never be truely happy if she doesn't have a child
3. Never EVER, not even if you're die, not even in the baby is a crazy flesh eating monster, should you have an abortion.

 

MRI's never find anything.

Pixar and Disney could have done something worthwhile with this. Whichever one did Sharkslayer, which featured the vegetarian sharks.

I guess it pleased the target audience, the same people that liked the books. Doesn't mean it's a good movie by any stretch of the imagination.

 

What do expect from a woman with a husband and three boys who graduated from Brigham Young? As I recall, Greeneyes and I didn't even consider that school, since you have to be a practicing Christian to attend. Actually, my biggest problem with them was the demand that I give up coffee. I'd sooner give up breathing. Stephenie is a practicing Mormon though, so I would expect her to have certain views.

What I can't understand is how she can write such drivel. She has a BS in English and her list of inspirations is great: "My favorite authors/biggest influences are (in no particular order) Orson Scott Card, Jane Austen, William Shakespeare, Maeve Binchy, Charlotte Bronte, Daphne DuMaurier, L.M. Montgomery, Louisa May Alcott, Eva Ibbotson, William Goldman, Douglas Adams, Janet Evanovich... the list goes on, but I think I hit the highlights." (Quoted from her unofficial bio, from www.stepheniemeyer.com.)

With all of that, couldn't she have resisted sounding like a fangirl on crack?

Raven

 

Hmm . . . A practicing Mormon writes a book which glorifies pedophilia, disdains abortion, and opposes pre-marital sex.

Q: Should I be surprised?

A: No.

* * *

Raven, simply because someone has lots of inspirations does not mean that they actually understood those inspirations. If she did, then she would not be a Mormon.

 

This, I simply do not get. Edward is a 100-something year old virgin? Hol-y shit. How can you be such a badass creature (well, usually) and still be such a loser? I mean, he couldn't have even gotten a prostitute?

 

See: Why the Twilight books are creepy Mormon propaganda with SPARKLES.

Also, Dude-Who-Plays-Edward-In-the-Movie thinks SMeyers is crazy and is trying to get fired because he's terrified of the Twilight fangirls.

Real lulz start in the last minute, but the whole thing is funny.

I may never stop laughing. Ever.

 

Robert Pattinson described the Twilight crowds as "Terryifying. It's like the sound you hear at the Gates of Hell."

In other news, Robert Pattinson wins at life.

 

I haven't read this thread, so I don't know if someone has said this, but I actually love twilight for one reason and one reason only:

It may just pull all the emo fangirls out of decent fanfiction and into the 'Twilight'.

Wouldn't it be wonderful if all the little emo bitches that give thousands of reviews for shit stories where Naruto and Sasuke are piano players who fall in tragic, but beautiful, romantic, and completely 'realistic', love suddenly disappear. Yeah, the Twilight section would fill up with shit within days, but at least it isn't Potter or Naruto or, please no, Dresden.

 

You make a good point, but sadly fangirls come in many different varieties. Sure, this'll probably cut down on the number of slash stories, but not all of them are going to flock to Twilight. There will still be plenty around to plague the HP fandom.

 

One word: Crossovers. Are you sure you want to go there? Because I'm betting that instead of writing Twilight fic, they'll write fics where Edward leaves Bella for Harry and vamps him and they go off to sparkle together in perfect unity for the rest of their lives.

 

...Ruin my good mood, why don't you?

No, I do understand that, but it will get rid of a few. And, it is always easier to tell a crossover slashfic than a normal slashfic, as they have to mention that it's a crossover.

If you see 'Harry Potter/Twilight', would you actually click on it?

 

Yes. Then I would immediately report it and hope it gets deleted.

 

Probably the first time I see one, much for the same reason I read Twilight in the first place. I know it will piss me off and offend me and make me want to throw something across the room and then stomp on it until it's dead, but I also know that it's likely hilarious (Harry Potter. Sparkling in the sunlight. I don't even know.) It's kind of like the trainwreck thing- you just can't look away.

 

I laughed hard at Pattinson's description of the fangirls and The author. He's got balls.