Title: Hearts on Detours
Author: Stanrick
Rating: Fiction T
Genre: Romance/Humor
Status: Complete
Library Category: Romance
Pairings: Harry/Hermione
Summary: Dark times lie ahead, they said. Soon we will have to decide between what is easy and what is right, they said. Yeah, well. Nobody told him they were actually talking about that Yule Ball nightmare that now lies inescapably ahead with no clear answers in sight. How will he ever get out of this mess, and is there any way that doesn't involve dancing? (There isn't.)
Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12064715/1/Hearts-on-Detours

It's surprisingly well written, for ffn.net standard. Author quite successfully (imo) emulates Shakespeare, so result takes some getting used to. The story is quite wordy, author often uses descriptions in a flowery prose type of writing. Despite that, the story feels refreshing in its original writing style. It isn't drowning in descriptions.

As for the plot, it's romance, so don't expect any elaborate plots and action. Another thing I don't like about it is that it contains so little magic. It's character focused romance though, so what can I expect? It's a story about Yule ball and events shortly before it, so its 74k words can keep some readers away. As I mentioned, it can feel a little wordy at times.

At some points, it seems to me that author sacrificed characters credibility for prose, so some characters seemed just a little OOC at times. Fortunately, it's just shorter remarks that I feel are used to make this story feel Shakespearesque, but I remove 1 point from final rating for that and other small issues (awkward phrasing in several places).

If you like romances, just give it a try. It might surprise you. 4/5.

 

This fic is a writing exercise first and a story second, so 'wordy' is a bit of an understatement.

That said, the dialogue is actually pretty funny in places. I haven't finished it yet, but I haven't stopped wanting to, so that's something.

---------- Post automerged at 23:54 ---------- Previous post was at 19:38 ----------

Finished it.

It's actually pretty great. Full on, teeth rottingly fluffy, but great. Ron is the real hero of this story.

Beyond that there's not much to say really. Characters are maybe too likeable? Everyone's heart is in the right place all the time and we get bonding from everyone with everyone, but that's part of the charm of the story as well.

Fluff, but good fluff. 4/5 is probably about right.

Edit: can confirm, I was surprised.

 

The only thing I remember about this fic is that its prose was super awkward and made me give up somewhere in the second chapter.

 

This author will never use 2 words when s/he can use 4 to say the same thing. I don't want to say it's overly discriptive, because that's not quite the problem. The problem has more to do with word choice.

One of the best examples is whe the author uses magical mice as surragotes to decribe characters who aren't that different from canon. Hermione's is "curiously exploring the endless expanse of Hermione's extremities and in so far fearlessly uncompromising in its thirst for discovery". Do that once or twice, and it can be ok, but the first 4 chapters are like that.

It's incredibly difficult to get to what is actually happening because the way things are presented actively impede the reader. I could see some enjoying this for the two or three funny moments per chapter, but it has few other redeming qualities. 2/5

 

I found myself skipping some descriptions/paragraphs, but altogether I enjoyed the story and the dialogue in particular. If I had read it in its entirety I suspect my overall opinion would be worse.

Could be a couple chapters shorter and be better for it.

3/5.