This will be the thread where we post a summary of what we did under our reign. Typically with some screenshots but I totally forgot. Anyway, in that vein, the story of Vratislav of Bohemia

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Bretislav, on the day you were born and I held you in my arms, I knew that I would do everything to ensure you the best possible reign. And know that everything I've done, I've done so that you might rule well.

In October of 1066, the young Kaiser Heinrich IV saw fit to make me the Steward of the Holy Roman Empire, and using my new found position I was able to rapidly accumulate wealth, and prestige. The status and position it afforded me gave me significant resources and power, and as such I began to plan.

Through your dear departed mother Bretislav you have a claim on the throne of Hungary, and with my newfound power I would do everything to secure it for you.

But first I needed to secure your education, a compassionate curious boy as you were, you would never make a soldier as I had or my father, instead you would be a diplomat. Skills in diplomacy would be critical to ensuring a stable rule of a tumultuous country such as Hungary, I sent you to foster with a landed knight by the name of Zdik, never before had I known a more gifted diplomat.

I also needed to ensure that upon your ascension to the throne of Hungary you wouldn't be entirely reliant on the people and wealth there to secure your rule.

After several arduous talks with my brothers we managed to agree that you would succeed me on my death rather than one of them, as had been the tradition in our family for generations.

With that I began my planning, I rapidly secured three military alliances with Boleslaw of Poland, and married two of your sisters of to major Bavarian Dukes, specifically the Dukes of Steyermark and Bavaria. Meanwhile the Heir to Austria married Duchess Matilda of Tuscany, a powerful alliance sat on our southern borders. Be mindful of that while King.

For the next two years, I'm afraid I did not do much beyond expand the army. Commissioning ten mangonels, recruiting and then doubling a regiment of Zbrojnosh, and commissioning a hundred archers.

In 1069 the greatest threat to your future throne first reared his head, Prince Laslzo of Hungary pressed his claim against the boy king Salamon, and won with the assistance of Kaiser Heinrich. He was later quickly deposed by Salamon's supporters, but Salamon himself was dead, as such the throne passed to Laslzo's sister.

The throne was consistently juggling hands for the next 5 years.

During Laszlo's War, Bolseslaw called me for help against the Pagan Pomeranians, a war I was eager to take part in, a chance to test my armies mettle, and they proved wildly successful against a unwashed heathens. Hopefully Hungarian Levies prove to be as easy prey.

With riches looted from the Pomeranian hinterlands I managed to double the amount of standing mangonels. The remainder of said riches were used to bribe Heinrich, his endless wars to subjugate the Baltic coast were dipping deep into the throne's coffers. Said bribe saw me gifted the title of Duke of Moravia.

Otakar of Steyermark, one of my ducal allies, called for my assistance against a vassal uprising in his lands, finally a chance to test my mettle against good Christian chivalry. His hosted position itself into a battle in the fields of Waidhofen, while I put the rebels capital to siege. Not quite the defining military battle I had hoped for but the mangonels proved more than effective against the shoddy Bavarian walls.

In 1074 you reached your majority and I was able to secure you a marriage to an Occitan Duke, I had hoped to marry you to a more powerful and closer Dukes daughter but they were all too old or young and I feared that if you died heirless, than the claim on the throne would be lost.

With your majority I felt comfortable declaring on the current puppet of Laslzo in Hungary, and with it the first war of conquest began. I did this the day after your wedding, a bit premature, but I was afraid that Laslzo would be able to cement power even further, if left in peace.

On the 2nd of September 1076, Heinrich IV, Kaiser of the Holy Roman Empire, dies heirless. His two daughters and wife flee the country. Six months later in Rome, Dirk Floriszoon of Holland is crowned Holy Roman Emperor by the Pope.

I admit at first I was hesitant about the Dutchman, his eyes turned ever westward, toward the Anglos, and French, while my interests were fixed firmly across the Carpathians, luckily he allowed me to retain my position as Steward which allowed me to continually keep gold flowing into our coffers.

While all this was going on, the war with Hungary was on going, our enumerable allies and the forces of Bohemia proved more than a match for the natives. And on 29th of June I took the Hungarian capital and you were crowned King of the Hungarians. Emperor Dirk fearing the Russian and Polish interests in the region granted you independence before going back to his war in the west.

The next few years were quiet, I was granted the title of King of the Bohemians, after I financed the Emperors wars in the west with his own gold.

In 1079 Laszlo saw fit to rise up against us once again, and I'm afraid I was unable to secure your crown, the Poles, and the Bavarians saw no need to fight in an internal Hungarian conflict, and my army was decimated at the First Battle of Visegard. My brother Ota fell there too.

In 1085 Laszlo captured you in battle, and we were forced to sue for peace. He had his sister crowned and once again the throne was out of our hands, and I was aging, I feared the worst.

In 1087 after several expansions to the army, I thought that the least I could do is secure the traditional Bohemian lands for you as well, and I declared on Laszlo's puppet, she did not hold his title of Duke of Transylvania and therefore had no access to his great host, and the war was quickly decided. It appeared God favored me and the two had a failing out in which Laszlo left her to her fate.

At the last minute, as I stood outside the gates of Visegrad, the heinous woman had saw fit to make the site of my greatest defeat her capital, Laszlo appeared to marshal the remaining Hungarian forces in a desperate charge against my vastly superior numbers. They were of course, crushed. Laszlo was severely injured and died from his wounds not long after.

Laszlo's sister, who at this point was Queen of Hungary was deposed, and one of her cousins was made king, a boy of about 14, he secured a powerful alliance in that he married a Roman Princess. This was the darkest hour, the throne should've been yours by right at this point but the vast legions of the Roman Empire stood between it and us. I was an old man with nothing to lose anymore, so I declared.

We took to the fielded with renewed vigor and force, this kingdom and throne would be yours. Two years of intense fighting and we came out victorious, not even the might of Rome could stop me from securing your future, in 1093 you were crowned.

All was finally right, and I could retire and spend time with your stepmother and youngest siblings and even my grandchildren in peace.

I invited all the living family to Prague for many celebrations, and finally got to know your sons. They were all incompetent, dim, and downright villainous. Being a father is no easy feat as I'm sure you are aware, and I'm afraid in my endless quest to secure your reign, I never once taught you what it meant to be a father, never once assisted you in raising your sons. As much as it pained me, I saw no recourse but to disinherit them, I fought too long and too hard to see this realm I built with mine own two hands fall apart to them.

I took your youngest son as my ward and retired to Prague to live out the rest of my days. He's a rowdy boy, opposed to you as boy who was more solemn, I get the feeling he will be a great warrior, and a better general, but I doubt I'll live to see it.

In Feburary of 1095, Pope Urbanus the II decries that all Christian Kings must do their sacred duty and secure the Holy Land in the name of God, and show the heathens and infidels the will of God. I fear as a Duke or even King, I seldom preformed my duty as a Christian to bring the gospel to the infidels. I hope you manage to secure your own place in heaven by succeeding where I failed.

In October of 1095, I was well into my twilight years, when Laszlo's only daughter rose up in rebellion against you once again, and I took to the field that final time, my aching bones on the saddle screamed with every hoof beat, but I only needed to think of your young son back in Prague to steady my lance and heart.

By 1097 the rebels were routed and the Laszlo's cause with it, his daughter was no great general as he was, and his vast armies were lost when his lands were portioned among his relatives. Bohemian mettle and the grace of god lead us to victory.

I fear my time grows short, as I leave this mortal realm, my thoughts ever turn to the future. Rule well Bretislav I of Bohemia

- Your father, Vratislav.

 

So, small explanation about my rule. Holy Roman Emperor decided to wage wars on bordering nomads for most of my reign. And they enjoyed very much to dick around in Hungary with their 5 to 10k stacks. So Hungary got ravaged while I was trying to keep everything together. I couldn't declare my own wars I was in constant defence thanks to HRE. Then pope decided he wanted some wars too so crusades began. My strategy become hunting small stacks in countless wars my liege declared to snipe some nobles for gold to build my holdings and man at arms. I've declared grand total of 4 wars. 1 for a county, 1 for duchy of the that county, 1 for independence and 1 holy war for Poland. I thought a snippet like this would be better instead of me writing ransoming irrelevant noble #158.


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5 September 1135 AD, four days before death of King Bretislav Vratislavic.

Due to decaying state of his health, King Bretislav has started to perform his duties from his bed in his sleeping chamber. This war against Poland and issue of the succession was sapping his last bit of health.

His two sons barged in the room while he was dictating some letters to be sent to his friends. A rather popular personality King Bretislav was among the high society.

“Father, Poland has fallen. Konni performed wonderfully” his older son said in excitement. Their armours were still on them. Probably rode back right after everything has settled to give good news personally, the King thought.

“Of course, they did. It took my decades to found a reliable fighting force from them. Have you thought I wasted my years for nothing? Now to think about it, I wasted my years trying to rise you as proper kings, definitely a wasted effort, no, not a good precedent, not a good precedent at all. Okay, I forgive your indiscretion”

King continued his talk. It was a soft speech but lacked playfulness unlike his previous words. It was time for important matters.

“Go clean, eat something and wear something comfortable. We need to talk”

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“So, Poland…” the King said, turned to his younger son. When did this kid become this shy he wondered? If only he could always talk like he was in a battlefield, leading an army...

“Poland, yes… uh… Konni performed spectacularly father. There were barely left anyone alive from enemy side after making contact with us. That is why they converted I assume” he answered, getting more confident with each word. Even the idea of battle can rein his shyness, there is still hope the King thought

“About that father, neither Archbishop nor his Holiness is happy about you not stopping after they decided to convert mid-war”. Words of your older son stopped your train of thought.

“I have already dealt with that. His Holiness Sergius IV is not naïve enough to think we would stop after all those battles.”

“But father…”

“I told Sergius if they wish to pray Jesus, they can do it under our banner. I am not excommunicated, am I? If Sergius was serious you know what would be the end result. Also, I am going to die in a week, I don’t care about some strongly worded statements. “the King dismissed.

“This again, father? You are not going to die. Mother says you are healthy as usual. Please stop having such thoughts” Vladimir said. He was getting worried about this. His father was adamant that he was going to die soon since last year.

“Nice to know you still heed your mother. At least I did something right, or she did more likely. And under normal circumstances I would’ve agreed with you. Your mother has this habit of being the most intelligent person in a room. That is why I married her. But I know my body, so we are dealing with succession and all those unpleasant issues today. No, not dealing. I’ve already made my plans. You are going to be good sons for once, sit in silence and listen to me.” The king drunk some water before continuing his speech.

“Have you ever wondered why you two are the only ones inheriting any holding from me? Because rest of your brothers are too much like me. Given time and effort, they would make decent kings. But they would be shackled by the same chains shackling me even in my death. My father, bless his soul, saw that when I was a little kid and did everything in his power for me to be comfortable in these shackles but there is no escape from me from them.

I am talking about other people you idiots. My rule is so strong because people like me, thus willing to do things for me. I have right guy for right task almost all the time and because I like them too. I’ve grown to like my shackles. They became a strong foundation to my rule.

They, however, also had bound me to certain actions. I had fought in countless wars. Fought for my subjects, for my vassals, for my liege, for pope, for Jesus, and finally, for you and not once for myself. I am tired, and I feel like I had never owned my own life.

Pulling your other brothers into succession would force this destiny over them. It is something I wouldn’t even want for my enemy.

You two however, you carry that spark of greatness I’ve seen in your mother decades ago. You can live for your own and rule the realm while doing so. My actions in last years were all for trying to create conditions for your rule to be yours. I want to you to wage your own wars for yourselves and not anybody else. I want you to live your own for yourselves.

We broke away from the empire already so no more pointless wars due to some idiot with an ugly crown. And I am giving you your own kingdoms. Go fight with each other if you want other’s crown and stomach fighting against your own blood. But fight only if you want to fight”

Vladimir, you get Poland and the Konni force, Bretislav, don’t make that face, you get Hungary, it would be trivial for you to recruit more unlike your brother. Now get out, I am going to sleep.”

 

My son,
In the name of Jesus our savior and king of all men I greet you, and compliment you on your succession to king of Bohemia. In the Lord's name I give you my blessing, and command you to end the heretics to our east, for they have perverted our ways.
Of course, you have heard me say all of this before, you marched into battle with me against the unclean adamists. You were there when I slew the vidilist witch who nearly ended our kingdom.
Like my father before me, you were not firstborn to me. LIke my father before me, you were the favored son of the favored wife. And like the ancient patriarchs of the Israelites, i now charge you with inheritance. To your brother I gave upper Silesia as a possession, but to you I gave my father's Konni, and enough money to make them useful.
I am proud of the man you have become, and proud of how you have learned the fine arts of skulldugery and conversation. I'm sure that is how you found this note, hidden in the toy horse I gave you and then hid that horse inside a locked chest inside an empty tower near the new jousting grounds.
I never said I'd make it easy for you.

When I inherited the lands from my father Bretislav, things were a mess. He had just conquered poland, and had no clue what to do with it. He gave me all of the lands to divide as best I could. So i trusted in god, and gave them to good catholics. For I was going to bring this land to christendom, and the three rebel heads whose pickled remains sit on my desk are a reminder of the vidilist weakness. I am sure you have moved them into a dungeon to torture some rebel scum. I always admired that about you.

You know much of the history, but I want to explain some of the reasoning behind my actions. I have been called inscrutable, but in truth, I do as I please, in the name of god, without fear or reservation. And the fact that I could do so terrifies so many of the lesser nobles.

When I assumed the throne, his most magnificent holiness had called a crusade, so I of course joined in. Death was to fall upon our enemies. But first troubles must be addressed at home. One of the cardinals must have pulled some strings to send so maligned a bishop into my court. I beseached him to learn and study. For hours we discussed the important dictates of the papacy, the critical nature of believing in Jesus as our savior. And he was weak and ineffective. You knew more about catholicism than he did, and you were but 5 years old. Still he would not relent. I'm sure you've already found evidence of what happened. That book on the forest of Valborne was misplaced wasn't it.

As I marched my armies to the crusade I became ill, as you know. I sent for a physician, and two answer the call. A good catholic and an expertly trained physician were the two most promising candidates. The physician was extraordinarily intelligent. She had studied in the Holy Roman Empire, the Roman Empire*, and even with the pagans, adopting their ways. So of course I slew her and took the catholic, and as god willed it, he cured me instantly. Never trust the heathens, their wise women know nothing compared to a good catholic.

We had reached the duchy of Apulia in Italy when your uncle, Cardinal Waslav sent me a letter, notifying me that the vidilists had risen up in a massive host, 14,000 strong, threatening all of eastern christendom. With great rage I ordered the ships turned and abandoned the crusade to wage my own personal one against the heathens. When I arrived, they had besiged and overrun several large towns in poland. They sent an envoy demanding the release of their wise woman, and the return of their lands. I listened carefully to the envoy, and asked if he would join us as a catholic to fight the vidilist heathens. Strangely he seemed confused, so I asked a second time, showing him the pickled head of the wise woman doctor. He attacked me in a rage, and I condemned his soul to hell where it belonged. The head of the uprising soon had a jar of his own. By the time I had finished, the crusade was over, and I was called to account for my actions.

The pope himself had invited me to a feast to discuss my lack of participation in the crusade, despite pledging my army. It was at this point I knew that there was a cardinal in the church working against me, or perhaps against my brother. Regardless, I explained to his Excellency my reasoning, and he was surprised by his lack of information. Hearing how I put down a revolt that had more men than the enemy at Galicia, he was impressed. He even sent a gift of funds to me for my piety in defeating the pagans at home, instead of focusing on glory abroad.
But I watched in consternation as the gluttonous reprobate ate his way through enough food to feed half an army, and then vomited and then ate enough again for the other half.
When the word got out about his terribly gluttonous behavior, I obviously condemned his holiness for this. The Pope sent a letter about insulting him at his own table, but this was obviously the man, and not the pope talking, so I ignored it.

To the south, my brother, who had inherited the kingdom of Hungary, was usurped by an Arpad. This was unacceptable, so i went to war to secure my place. I would have pushed for my brother's restoration, save that I received an note from him saying he supported my rule. When two kings agree, god himself declares it to be truth, so I fought and restored the rule of our dynasty under my own name.
Which of course is when the vidilists rose again, demanding an end to our persecution of their ways and forcible conversion.
Thus you have the third head in your office. I never did learn his name. I'm sure it translated to son of the devil or something similar.

Upon my success the pope again invited me to a feast, and again I was forced to oblige. He then showed such gluttony that even satan would have turned in disgust. He dissolved a pearl in vinegar and swallowed it, calling it the most delicious he had ever tasted.
So needless to say I announced that his holiness's gluttony was beyond the pale to all who would listen.
Then I asked him for a crusade against the Adamist scum to our east. He declined. Then I asked him for money to finance the war, and he grudgingly obliged. I again see that as the man refusing, but pope accepting this sacred mission. I then went to my own personal crusade to put clothes on the Adamists of the east, and succesfully took back the kingdom of Galicia Volhynia for clothed catholics. Ahh, it was glorious. To lead my own crusade for my own people against heretics. Naked heretics exposing their sins before god. There was nothing quite like it.

After your mother died I remarried, and unfortunately, as you are reading this, I died before I was able to settle the inheritance properly. I'm sure many hungarians will flock to your little brother due to his extreme youth. I ask that you be kind to him. My disinherited siblings were given land and abbeys in my kingdom, and I too had a brother inherit Hungary. Find peace where you can, and do not follow in satan's footsteps.
I will see you in the kingdom of heaven, where we may one day fight together against the forces of Satan again. Deus Vult!

*Roman Empire was what the byzantine empire was called contemporaneously.