Title: The Wizard Who Meddled With Time
Author: Team Ozone
Rating: T
Genre:
Status: Abandoned
Library Category: The Alternate's
Pairings: Listed as Harry/Fleur
Summary: Terrible things happen to wizards who meddle with time. When that wizard is Harry Potter, the terrible things tend to happen to other people instead. Fourth Year. Time Travel.
Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11420609/1/The-Wizard-Who-Meddled-With-Time
Link: DLP-Work by Author

I went into this fic with extremely low expectations because the title and summary seemed quite sketchy but I was pleasantly surprised. It's quite well written and I enjoyed the author's sense of humor (for ex. how Harry leaves the Dursley's). It has a lot of fresh content that I haven't read before and it dodges the major cliches of time travel stories like Harry being an Unspeakable or having some goblin friend bullshit status. It's also got a solid update rate (90k words, published in Aug) which is nice.

It rang some alarm bells with Harry seeming OP at the start, but it's toned down in later chapters where we find that Voldemort and Dumbledore are in fact far out of his league.

So far I'm suspending my disbelief for why he didn't just travel back to pre-Halloween 1981 and hoping the author explains it later.

Overall 4/5 from me.


Edit by Minion: I added the WbA link

Edit: ~.~ Didn't realise this was a DLP work, plugged the author name in the search before posting.

Edit the third: according to the latest update, this story has been abandoned.

 

The conversation between HP and 'Junior' was clumsy to say little. You would think a talk with your past self would be somewhat more exciting. Although, I did chuckle at this:

"Never doubted you. I'm proud of you, me."

The man and boy clasped arms together tightly, holly wand pointed squarely at the younger Potter's chest.

"Avada Kedavra, you noble self-sacrificing son of a bitch," he said, in a tone quieter and more respectful than the words themselves. "And fuck you, space-time continuum!" he shouted at the top of his lungs.
--

I am impressed it took so few words to convince 'Junior' it was necessary for him to die.

 

So, I've talked about this on the WBA thread, so I'll keep it short. Great premise, decent opening, lost in execution. Otters wants to make things happen but strong-arms events too much ending up with forced and hard to believe plot developments.

3/5. Technically great, good premise idea.

 

I'm surprised to see this here, but glad people are reading it. It's rough as it's an early first draft. I'd planned to try getting the final edited version into the Library, but didn't expect anyone would put this version forward.

I openly admit that it has too much of nothing in places, and there's too much emphasis on seemingly unimportant events which foreshadow later plot. This will be cut down eventually, but the critics in WBA are dead on about that part. It'll be my main focus when I revise it - after finishing the story itself.

 

I found it a chore to read through, to be honest. After a certain point, my eyes glazed over, and it just seems like the vast majority of the fic is filler. It's fine if you're randomly planting ideas to use later on and eventually wrap it together neatly with a bow, but at least make it interesting to read about. You could honestly trim about half of the story off and it would probably be better.

3/5 for me. There's a lot of potential, but it's just bogged down in overly-wordy ramblings.

 

I like this story, I am hoping that we will see some more time magic. Imagine if dementors were made to starve for centuries, it might allow it to be sufficiently diminished to be killed or simply permanently contained.

So the plan we guess is to alter the ritual just enough to weaken Tom a lot, so that he can be dealt with. So that means he will be altering the existing ingredients or adding new ones. I know for certain that it contains bone of father, flesh of servant, blood taken by force from his enemy, unicorn blood likely forcibly taken and Nagini venom, a horcrux venom could be important. Imagine if he simply help make Tom more human.
Since Harry blood is to be taken, and he is going along with the ritual, it is not forcibly taken. He could alter his ingredient by dosing himself. Would potions carry over?
What if he adds more than father bones, but his mothers, and both families remain?
I wonder what happens if you drink unicorn blood willingly given, and would Harry pass that to Tom. The combination of freely and forcibly given blood could have consequences. Tom uses a feath from Fawkes, so blood and tears might be acceptable. A Phoenix is a creature of rebirth and healing.
Nagini is a horcrux, if the others were used, would it force the pieces into a single body?

He can use time magic to add or alter the rebirth.

 

The fic has its problems (mentioned above) but I give it a 4/5 for the humour, cool and unexplored methods of messing with time with magic, and characterization of some characters (e.g. Aberforth).

Fic does require some srs suspension of disbelief, e.g. Molly/Arthur readily accepting that Harry is 17 and him drinking firewhiskey with them within a couple of minutes of him showing up. No one has even looked at him strangely for suddenly being a beast at all categories of magic either.

 

Heh, some people on FF.net are really angry about the Sirius revelation. Which is amusing because it is probably one of the better ideas in the story. Minor spoilers.

Absolutely hilarious.

 

The first two are par for the course, really, in regards to fanfiction comments. But the last one actually made me angry. Such an inflated sense of righteousness, entitlement and pettiness. Oh, and F-words obviously make this story deserve an M rating. British swearing would have been okay, but the F-word, oh no, that's not gonna fly with Angie.

I'm tempted to look for this account and utter a few reading recommendations in a mail. American Psycho? Lolita?

 

I found that review particularly hilarious because "fuck" is one of the most British words I know.

 

I think, on a subconscious level, the reason many dislike Sirius being portrayed as a murderer within this particular story, is because of the nagging feeling that the author is trying to preach to the readers, which people tend to hate. It's like he's going out of his way to bring everyone into the circle of love.. or something.

 

It does depend on the ffnet mods interpretation really. Adherence to the rules is fairly lax on the site, really so I doubt any action would be taken.

 

The whole "Sirius is actually a mass murderer" is one of the more interesting plot ideas I've seen. Bravo!

Ironically, if you look at the immediate consequences of Wormtail's and Sirius's actions back in 1981, here's the tally:

Wormtail gets two innocent people killed and is indirectly responsible for Voldemort's defeat, bringing about over a decade of peace. He's also indirectly responsible for Harry getting stuck with the Dursleys.

Sirius gets twelve innocent people killed, doesn't contribute to the Voldemort situation, and is indirectly responsible for Harry getting stuck with the Dursleys, arguably even more so than Wormtail to some extent, which boggles the mind.

If we're judging their actions by consequences alone, Wormtail's actions have brought about more good than Sirius's, which is kind of funny to consider.

Wormtail, the hero the magical world deserves, but not the one it needs right now?

 

I like the premise but I feel like the fic missed the mark on the humor a bit and there's just so many seemingly pointless events that it's a bit hard to stay interested. The humor almost felt like Nonjon to me, but it felt forced. Am excited for Harry/Fleur though. I'll give it a 3/5.

 

Seriously, 90,000 words in and the Goblet of Fire hasn't even been introduced. If the author keeps writing at this pace, the story won't be finished until it 500,000 words.

Too long.

 

Gotta be honest and say that actually making Sirius responsible for the deaths of those muggles is one of the most brilliant ideas I've ever seen in any fanfic, and deserves credit on that basis alone.

Besides, it's a fun read, what more can I ask for?

4/5 rounded up to 5/5 because original ideas should be rewarded for their originality

 

This is definitely the most promising story I've started reading in the last few months - not that I've been reading many. It's a bit slow by most people's standards but I'm perfectly fine with extremely long stories so I'm more than happy with it. I've never seen quite this take on time travel before, similar but never quite this, I like it.

I think the absolute best part of the entire story was the revelation that the goat was a house elf. That was hands down the most amused I've been at something in a fic in a long time. The fact that this is going to be H/F makes very happy too, there really are less than a handful of good H/F stories out there unfortunately.

Easy 4.5/5 from me. I'd give it a 5 but something felt off a couple of times, mostly in the earlier chapters. The way some of the paragraphs were written were making me lose attention in the story, perhaps too many words spent on a single idea that wasn't really interesting?

EDIT: The whole Snape/Student thing was weird and I kind of overlooked it while reviewing to be honest. Honestly I never actually thought this was going to go anywhere which is why I didn't pay much attention to it. Might have been wrong there.

 

It would be cool if he used time magic to be a divination prodigy, even if the future is still restricted to him, viewings of the past and present could be very useful.

 

It has a good dose of originality wrapped up in seemingly pointless dialogue and humor that are detrimental to the story pacing. But it worth a read and there is always the H/F goodness to look forward. 3.5/5 for me.

 

I personally liked the whole premise of Sirius killing all those muggels it is a new concept for me which is something I enjoy a great deal as a reader. 4/5 in my personal oppinion.