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Old 09-29-2009, 12:43 AM   #1
The Santi
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All the Dementors of Azkaban by Lifewriter - T/PG13

Title: All the Dementors of Azkaban
Author: Lifewriter
Rating: T (PG-13)
Genre: Humor
DLP Category: Humor/Parody
Words: 14,603
Published: September 12, 2009

Status: Complete
Summary:AU PoA: When Luna Lovegood is condemned to Azkaban prison for her part in opening the Chamber of Secrets, Harry Potter is the first to protest. Minister Fudge is reluctant to comply, but then again he never really had a choice in the first place. Oneshot.
Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5371934/...ors_of_Azkaban

Basically, this is an alternate universe in which Luna was given Riddle's diary instead of Ginny, and she ended up in Azkaban for some reason. The story also assumes that Harry and Luna somehow managed to become friends during Luna's first year, and Harry decides to protest her sentence at Azkaban by staying at the prison.

It's got some pretty funny moments, including Harry's attempts at befriending the Dementors, a high stakes poker game with the inmates of Azkaban, and Sirius and Harry's interaction


4/5


Checked by Minion, February 23, 2013

Last edited by Dark Minion; 02-23-2013 at 04:59 PM.
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Old 09-29-2009, 02:01 AM   #2
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This was brilliant. The whole "Dementors are misunderstood" bit was great, as was Harry casually referring to the Lestranges by their nicknames to DD, the best part had to have been Bellas fan girl worship of Neville.
5/5 because it was original, entertaining, was a great length (over 15,000 words) and made me laugh at times.
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Old 09-29-2009, 02:59 AM   #3
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God, it was good. Love the Dementors, as well as those poker tournaments.

5/5
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Old 09-29-2009, 07:57 AM   #4
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This one is great, and long to boot!

It's pretty funny, and I enjoyed reading it.

4/5
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Old 09-29-2009, 09:58 AM   #5
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I'm feeling the love to. Good work, good length, good writing.

4.5/5, but rated as a 4. Some of the Luna humour has been done to death. But the rest of it was sound.
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Old 09-29-2009, 10:39 AM   #6
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That fic was just what I needed right about now, and that makes me feel great. Harry's characterization was fantastic, Sirius' was just as good, and the wealth of original ideas in this little story made my day.

A well-deserved 5/5, and an addition to my favourites.
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Old 09-29-2009, 01:03 PM   #7
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A good laugh. Quite well written.

4/5 for me.
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Old 09-29-2009, 04:30 PM   #8
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Classic Crack. 5/5

 
" "Mister Potter... I have no idea how you did this, but it is probably all your fault. Ten points from Gryffindor." "


Made the fic.
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Old 09-30-2009, 06:37 AM   #9
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It was fun. It doesn't have an ounce of logic, but as a crack!fic I guess that doesn't really matter. Loved the bit with Hermione and the dementors:

Quote:
“I just can’t believe it, Harry,” Hermione shook her head. “I’ve read all about them, and the things they’ve done, and it’s horrifying! I can hardly stand being near them.”

“They’re just misunderstood!” Harry urged eagerly. “Think about it! I bet you would be upset too if everyone tried to avoid you, and then locked you up on an island with a bunch of criminals.”

Hermione stared at him, shocked. “You... you’re right!” she said, horrified. “Oh, those poor things! I bet no-one’s ever shown them any love!”

“I knew you’d understand,” Harry smiled at her. “Most people think I’m just crazy, you know.”

And so, the Society for the Promotion of Understanding of Dementors (or SPUD for short) was born.
4/5
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Old 09-30-2009, 10:35 AM   #10
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meh, it was mildly amusing...in some parts.

Definitely not nonjon level. And since he sets the bar I can't really give this a high rating.
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Old 09-30-2009, 12:44 PM   #11
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Since comparing to nonjon is like trying to compare apples and moons, I'm going to give this a 5/5. I haven't laughed so hard in ages .
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Old 09-30-2009, 04:28 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Aekiel View Post
Since comparing to nonjon is like trying to compare apples and moons, I'm going to give this a 5/5. I haven't laughed so hard in ages .
Philistine.
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Old 09-30-2009, 11:37 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by N View Post
Philistine.
TRUTH TRUTH TRUTH.

People are spoiled. And they don't know anything.

This ain't quite as good as all that - it's amusing, sure.

I found this pretty fun to read, FOR THE MOST PART. It ventured too much into stupid gags though, and the Manipulative!Dumbledore reference (brief thought it is) makes me drop it at least a full point. I'm sick of that cliche.

However it has decent writing and some funny moments - and is long enough not to be annoying.

3.5/5

-J
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Old 10-01-2009, 12:00 AM   #14
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I loved this, especially the parts about SPUD and Bellatrix practically worshiping Neville... XD Great story, long enough to entertain for a good amount of time, but still short enough to read in one sitting. The writing's pretty good, and just the thought of hot-pink prison cells made me giggle a bit. 5/5.
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Old 10-01-2009, 02:34 AM   #15
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Brilliant, such that I was late to class because I couldn't stop reading it.

It possessed good characterization, and it was damn hilarious. 5/5

Of course, a general dearth of good readings of late (mostly because I've read everything else...) may influence my vote somewhat, but meh.
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Old 10-01-2009, 07:19 AM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeram View Post
TRUTH TRUTH TRUTH.

People are spoiled. And they don't know anything.

This ain't quite as good as all that - it's amusing, sure.

I found this pretty fun to read, FOR THE MOST PART. It ventured too much into stupid gags though, and the Manipulative!Dumbledore reference (brief thought it is) makes me drop it at least a full point. I'm sick of that cliche.

However it has decent writing and some funny moments - and is long enough not to be annoying.

3.5/5

-J
Fics that take cracks at cliches tend to mention the cliches in passing :P

Highly amusing fic all in all - though it does drag a bit at some parts.

4/5
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Old 10-01-2009, 05:39 PM   #17
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One of the best cracfics I've ever read, i laughed the whole time (almost).

5/5
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Old 10-02-2009, 12:41 AM   #18
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I liked it but I don't find it library worthy, DLP seems to have very high standarts and even for a humor fic All the dementors in Azkaban feels lacking. I didn't laugh trough the whole fic, in fact I didn't laugh. No fap october might be making me grumpy.

2/5 <.<
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Old 10-02-2009, 06:50 AM   #19
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It was ok, I think.

The writing wasn't that great and a few clichés bothered me, i.e. manipulative!Dumbledore. I have seen that one way too often to find it funny, especially the twinkling eyes and the line "for the greater good".

I really liked how he/she described Bellatrix, and how Neville performed at poker. SPUD was a good one and is a nice example how to mention clichés in passing without overdoing it.

All in all I think it's better than a lot of stuff in the Humour section of the library, though not top rated material.

3.7 / 5
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Old 10-02-2009, 04:40 PM   #20
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I rarely rate/opine at all, but I think this story did not deserve the praise it was given.

At first the story was very entertaining, and I even laughed out loud a few times. Thinking back though, it could be more due to the fact that good humour fictions are hard to come by nowadays, so my taste for good comedy became rusty.

Closer to the end I was thinking only about, how long until it's finally over. I suffered a sequence of pointless scenes, repeating each other, with nor logic behind them, and nor plot. The scenes don't flow into each other, which makes the whole thing look ragged and detached. There is no climax, conclusion, or denouement.

Also, the author is imitating Rorschach's Blot's 'Make A Wish' story, which was also dragged for too long, and was only entertaining as long as the Reader was kept guessing about the next impossible accident Harry could get into. After a while, Rorschach's authority suffered a great fall in my eyes, so I personally see no point to imitate the story, which is better off shamefully hidden somewhere.

At first I wanted to rate it 3/5, but through my rant I have convinced myself that '3' is too high for it. I'm at loss because I feel bad giving anyone a '2'. Oh well, 3/5 for being an original idea.

P.S. Can anyone give me definition for "crack fic" please? And it's etymology.
P.P.S. Oh, the 100th post. Such a waste *dramatically*
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