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WIP Traveler by The Straight Elf - T - Pokemon

Discussion in 'Games' started by MonkeyEpoxy, Apr 14, 2013.

  1. crimson sun06

    crimson sun06 Unspeakable

    Joined:
    Jun 21, 2013
    Messages:
    742
    I was a little disappointed with this one. The first battle of any consequence in a while and it fell short of expectations compared to what we saw in the tournament and before it.

    Still this chapter had its moments. The morbidity of Sneasel's actions and
    Metagross' mega-evolution among them
    I wanted to like Jacqueline, but she just felt like the Catwoman to Steven's Batman. Her success will depend on how well Straight elf writes her from here on out. I'll be withholding my opinion on her for now.

    All things considered a fairly decent chapter if only for the plot progression which had been stagnating for a while now.
     
  2. Rising galium knight

    Rising galium knight Squib

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2016
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    8
    High Score:
    0
    I don't know about you guys but the recent chapter have started to seem quite bland to me. The bit with Daisy Oak was interesting but ever since she left the story's not quite getting on as I would have thought. Kanto arc was interesting as I eagerly waited for the update but Hoenn... When I get an alert that there's an update, the first thought in my mind is let it be interesting this time. Straight Elf goes on and on about training without anything really that may be worthwhile. Amd the last chapter..... Attack on Metagross colony? If it wasn't for my previous commitment to this story and hope that it'll get better I'll have removed it from the alert list at once.
     
  3. Legend3381

    Legend3381 Seventh Year

    Joined:
    May 26, 2016
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    218
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    New Jersey
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    0
    A new chapter was posted recently? I do agree that it is losing some of its pokemon trainer magic. Ash is going to become a part of the pokemon league and that seems to kill the best parts for me; traveling, pokemon training, exploring, etc. Ash's new career choice is a dead end after Hoenn. Ash also has too many self reflecting moments or moments where he is lost in his own thoughts. He is 11/12 not 86 and on his death bed
     
  4. Clerith

    Clerith Chief Warlock DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2008
    Messages:
    1,565
    Location:
    Finland
    No, there was no new chapter, just a necro.

    That said, I did lose most of my interest in the fic when Ash put on his super soldier suit, helmet and started training with melee weapons. I liked the pokemon trainer Ash, I have no interest in the league child soldier Ash.

    Pokemon magic, huh? Much like Harry Potter magic, if you diverge too much from the original source, it can lose its charm. Guess that happened.
     
  5. Gengar

    Gengar Polymagus Prestige DLP Supporter

    Joined:
    Feb 3, 2009
    Messages:
    62
    High Score:
    6005
    Eh, it lost all its charm for me when I couldn't ignore Ash was still a fucking ten year old any more.

    Age your characters up if you want to make a super serious pokemon fanfiction ffs.
     
  6. thattin

    thattin First Year

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2013
    Messages:
    23
    This really this, plus I find it really hard to buy how his pokemon got so strong so quickly. Ash didn't seem to do any too intense training (or at least nothing which I couldn't see 50+% of people doing) and he seemed to end up stronger than most lifelong trainers.

    If the events of the fic took place over say 5 years I'd find it all much more believable. Training constantly for 6 months, hard but doable for most people. Managing to keep at it for 5 years, a true champion in the making.
     
  7. CleanRag

    CleanRag Groundskeeper

    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2009
    Messages:
    374
    Location:
    --> ? <--
    New chapter up, and it seems to be dedicated to making Clerith and Hugplx's points for them. The half I read was scene after scene of adults telling Ash that he is to young for combat. Well if that is the case, then maybe ten year olds shouldn't be allowed to join special police forces dedicated to fighting dangerous criminals.

    I will probably finish it later, and continue to follow the story, but this quickly turned into a guilty pleasure at best over the last few chapters.
     
  8. Legend3381

    Legend3381 Seventh Year

    Joined:
    May 26, 2016
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    218
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    New Jersey
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    0
    I read the new chapter and I feel the story has lost the spirit that made it good....I hope it goes back to its roots
     
  9. DerHesse

    DerHesse High Inquisitor

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2010
    Messages:
    556
    Location:
    Frankfurt/Main
    I haven't read the new chapter yet and I'm kind wary given the previous comments.

    I loved the start, where the protagonist wasn't some special snowflake and got better through hard work and dedication. Suddenly there were Legendaries and Masters left and right.

    Is there any Kanto-fanfiction where the protagonist is some nobody (camper, youngster, bird keeper, etc.) on some random route starting with a shitty pokemon like Pidgey or Poliwag?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 23, 2016
  10. MonkeyEpoxy

    MonkeyEpoxy Alchemist

    Joined:
    Aug 11, 2011
    Messages:
    2,355
    Location:
    Texas
    Okay! That's what I'm fuckin talking about! All yall go read about the spell of the unown. Now.