If he was going to abandon it, wouldn't he just remove it from ff.net? Why would he lie?

 

well it was updated today i believe. the story plot seems to be stagnating...the romance part has been advancing, so has the training, but there has been nothing significant...

 

There's no reason for anything significant to happen. This story IS about H/Katie romance and training.

Nice chapter IMO. It's encouraging that the author had announced more chapters in a week or two.

 

Ah. It has been a long time coming.

I like that Harry's moved out from the Dursley's, and he's steadily improving. Like ip82 said, the updating schedule sounds nice - but I'm not going to expect anything, given the record.

Still 5/5 from me, though.

 

it was good and pretty origional but i would catch ollivander speaking in yoda speek every once in a while. its overall a B+ i think. overall preeeeeeeeeetty cool.

 

Updated again! Sirius is treated for mental demage from Azkaban by mediwitch! Was it done before alswere or is it original ?

 

Wow. I remember reading this story a long time ago and leaving it as dead - one of those stories nonjon hates (great beginning, then abandoned). I can't believe he updated.

He has a great writing style and so many original ideas. Ollivander as a mentor, a risk that Sirius will go insane, Harry actually feeling good after killing somebody, how a great person isn't a great fighter, Katie Bell as a girlfriend, Harry doing a ritual with somebody's help, a nonexistent Dumbledore, having an independant Harry between PoA and GoF, a novel way of dealing with the Dursleys, the list goes on and on.

 

On the contrary, I think romance here is pretty damn good. Remember, Harry's only 13 here. It's perfectly natural to feel confused and insecure at that age.

As for Sirius' sessions, they don't like such a big deal to me. It seems they are there only as a convenient plot tool to remove Sirius from Harry when neccessary and nothing more.

Still pretty sweet AU story, but the pace could speed up a bit.

 

As an AU survey piece it is OK, but to turn this into a highly rated HP fic
something has got to change. Just tweaking Goblet of Fire as with a Katie and
Ollivander twist isn't enough if the writer is going to keep in the same style as he has written. I guess another five or ten chapters will tell.

 

I happened to stumble onto this forum and thought I'd post.

Sirius’ sessions don’t actually have anything to do with killing him off eventually, I just didn’t like how the books glossed over any sort of mental trauma and thought it’d be more realistic to have Sirius slowly recover from his incarceration, not be 100% the moment he got out.

Over the summer and especially with Sirius I wanted Harry to have at least somewhat of a family, where he could talk and show weakness that he’d never show otherwise, even to himself. Once he gets back into school he’ll be changing into a more stoic and independent Harry, though his friends and Sirius will bring him out a bit.

After chapter 12 I’m going to try and pick up the pace a bit. No promises mind, but I’ve been writing some short stories to try and help me shorten things. Hopefully I’ll still be able to get all my ideas in and improve the overall story. The action should pick up a bit once he’s back in school. I’ve got some great ideas for the school year, as well as the tournament. Should be much fun.

The reviews and e-mails I’ve gotten about chapter 11 was a bit of a surprise to me and I thought I’d take the opportunity to clarify a couple things. I never read book six, was busy with RL when it came out and never made it a priority after from hearing friends and family that weren't impressed with it. I'm also not the most up to date with fanfiction and hadn't realized just how many people had such a dislike for Ginny. I probably would have changed the way I introduced the bonding had I known.

For the most part the bond won't really be important until later in the story, but I wanted to bring it in now instead of when it'd be convenient for Harry to use. One of the things I don't particularly enjoy is when people have him gain a spell/item/power/ability Just before he actually needs it to save the day.

Ginny won't become a central character in the story and she won't be some perfect beauty nor will she be incredible powerful, at least in most ways. She will be very gifted in shielding spells, but will have almost no ability at all in any form of attack. Basically it's because of what happened her first year, she blames herself for the attacks and no longer has the will to attack at all, even in defense of herself.

She'll be a loyal friend, give advice when he doesn't necessarily want it, nor will her advice be perfect. The bond will cause problems between all of them, but they're teenagers and will manage without too much trouble. Over the course of the year they'll become better friends and she'll be let in on some of Harry's secrets, but she won't start out being anywhere near as close to him as Hermione and Ron, even with the bond.

Thanks by the way for all the comments, I appreciate any criticism I can get as long as it helps me become better at the end.

Fission

 

Yeah, Ginny and whole super-Weasleys deal (Harry blushing while getting hugged by the mother cow, Burrow the bestest place in the whooole wide world etc...) were really, really dissapointing for me. I was hoping you'll find some way to ditch the trio and have Harry spend more time with the Quidditch team and other kids, following Olliviander's advice about widening his circle of friends. This chapter practically brings the whole thing back to roots, where NO ONE can EVER be better then Harry's golden friends and the PERFECT Weasley family...

Meh, there'd be nothing logically wrong with that, if there weren't gazzilion other stories exploring R/Hr + Harry soulbonded with Ginny. It's a shame to ruin such a good foundation just to write ANOTHER one.

 

I'm going to have to go and agree with IP here, I am extremely disappointed with this new chapter. The lack of Ollivander or the quidditch girls made me feel like i had traveled back in time a year and was once again reading H/G soulbond romance with best friends for ever Ron and Hermione. Since we are now spending two weeks with the Weasleys i'm guessing we aren't going to see anymore of Ollivander for a long time? I hope not since he was my favorite part and without him I fear this turning from a very good start to an independent harry into just a regular hogwarts romance fic.

I hope the next chapter is an improvement because I love the beginning of this fic.

 

Well it could turn out ok if some tension is created between harry's old friends and new friends. "real life teenage kicks"
Would having more friends make the "tri wizard contest" better, or even get him out of the contest.
I have kicked around the idea of a fourth year story with harry not being in the contest but haven't come up with any good ideas.

 

We'll be seeing Ollivander and Sirius, just not the first night because of the potions Mrs. Weasley put in his drink.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione will remain friends, but there will be no 'perfect' Weasley family involved. Ron, and to some extent, Ginny, will change to fit in with the new Harry. They'll be some tension at first between the new and old friends, but it'll work itself out. The real tension will be between Harry and his friends, including Ron and Hermione, and the rest of the Weasley family. They just need some time to change.

Harry may seemed to have returned to his old form at the Weasley's, but he'd only been there a few hours. Give him a few days and see how he likes Mrs. Weasley's pampering.

He will be involved in the Tri-Wizard Touranment, but by his own choice this time. The tournament will also be quite a bit different from the book.

Fission

 

I look forward to seeing your take on the tri-wizard tournament.
What task will you have? Good Luck.

 

I just noticed this the other night and tried it. Usually if IP says its good its pretty damn good. I like it but I agree with some that its beginning to go down hill. Up the pace, please do something like kill off the mother cow, and get back with the Quidditch team and older students and Ollivander.


3.5/5