So can we get some recent recs of Harry/Fleur and actually answer the question?

 

Well, Flayer is writing a good story at the moment. It is not long enough for the Library yet, but it's quite promising

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12733439/1/Blood-of-the-Tide.
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The only Fleur smutfic he recc'd was one that was H/F/Gabriella. The link is https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-w-bt80EWqTHL8VdrANYU1QStEVBh87ahPiIqLHC41c/edit

 

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/12813458/1/The-Lonely-Letters

Read everything, nothing worked for me so decided to write my own. Check it out.

 

Yeah, your story would greatly benefit from the WBA. It's already Riddled (see what I did there?) with grammatical issues on the first page -- just screams inelegance to me.

 

JR isn't consistent with tenses.

Fleur referring to her dad as "my pere" is incredibly jarring. If you really want to go down that road, try "Papa taught me the bubblehead charm last summer, so I could watch...".

If you don't speak French yourself, maybe you'd be better off avoiding this altogether. If you want to make her sound like a French person who has trouble with English, then go on forums and watch YouTube vlogs of French people speaking English until you can start figuring out how they sound. The most obvious one would be sentences that appear to be translated literally. For e.g, "You think yourself clever, no?" ("Tu te prends pour un p'tit malin, non?")

Anyway, there really is no need. Some authors handwave it with language acquisition potions. Just mention that she has an accent or something and leave it be.

From what I remember of canon, there's very little known about veelas. A lot of the things you bring up are fanon ideas. Nothing wrong with that, but then I find myself wondering why I'm reading the story when there's not much of a hook. What exactly separates your story from the rest? The letters are just about all I can think of, and really, they are sort of sweet. But everything in between letters just falls flat.

If you really have read "everything", and "nothing worked" for you, why don't you write out your own veela lore, instead of using tired cliches?

And have you read What You Leave Behind? If not, you really should. Harry and Fleur exchange letters there.

Ah, another thing that stood out was that Fleur accepted Voldemort being alive way too easily. She knows who Harry Potter and Voldemort are, so presumably, she knows the latter's been dead for a while. If you wanted to say she was more concerned than anything else, because of Harry's recklessness, then you didn't do a good enough job of showing it.

If you want to improve your story, post in Work by Author.

 

It is a first draft. Cheers.

 

Revise, edit, revise, edit, repeat. Keep at it.

 

Anything new in this space, guys? I'll take something average.

Please not The Life He Leads though. That was too melodramatic.

Sophprosyne's looks promising and the reviews have gotten me excited, but I'm waiting for more updates before starting it.

 

I'll never actually write this out, but after watching the trailer for FFXV I was stuck by the dynamic of the younger, black-haired male in a relationship with an older, attractive blonde. A Noctis reincarnated as Harry and Lunafreya reincarnated as Fleur story could be interesting to read...if an author with more talent than me piloted it.

 

Hey Guys,
big fan of Harry/Fleur pairings here.

Was reading A Snake is Born by Chaos and Tranquillity. While there are a few occasional mistakes/plotholes of a beginner writer, I gotta admit that the idea he/she uses to bring Harry and Fleur together is an excellent one:

For one, its not another fucking soul bond/marriage contract/life debt story with a noble Harry. It’s a more realistic(-ish, like I said some plot points aren’t clearly explained) take on a previously abused and Voldy influenced Harry - making him darker and more mature, while less noble.

In addition, the different characters also play into a very interesting and at odds with itself world. I won’t spoil it, but DEFINITELY check it out. Great idea if nothing else....

I will say right now that this fic DEFINITELY won’t be everyone’s cup of tea, and I admit it’s not perfect. BUT as a budding idea ... it is one of the best Harry/Fleur fics out there IMO of course.

It unfortunately seems abandoned/on hiatus (unfortunately). I’m new to this forum so I was going to ask: Anyone know what happened? Did the author lose interest? Will the story be continued? Has someone adopted it? Would anyone here be interested in adopting it? Would anyone be interested in writing a fic based on a similar idea? Does one like that already exist? Etc...

Like I said. I’m new here so don’t tear me apart pls. I’d adopt it myself but I unfortunately can’t write very well. Just not a creative writer.

 

If there are camps, then I’m definitely in the idea > execution camp, so that probably changes our view of this story.

Like I said in my original post, I admit there are grammatical errors, and problems with the story.

I know the “manipulative Dumbles” has featured in some stories before. That’s not what I meant when I said the idea is good. By ideas I mean:
1. Harry is independent, and doesn’t blindly rely on adults around him all the time (like he does in 99.99% of other HP/FD fics). He can actually think for himself.
2. HP and FD aren’t brought (forced) together by soul bond/marriage contract/life debt/etc.... They actually interact and talk and do stuff like ACTUAL HUMANS.
3. I think adding the whole Fleur is a shady mafia heiress and Harry has been heavily influenced by Voldy is a cool idea.

Basically it’s a breath of fresh air from the usual HP/FD fic. The only other fics that I read that are more or less similar in terms of having the ideas I listed ^^^^ are When a Veela Cries by E.C.Scrubb and Dagger and Rose (I think) by someone-who’s-name-I-forgot-sorry (the one where they fuck around w runes or something).

I might take up the fic but I’ll have very little time for it. Uni, national level sports and part time job all take a toll.

 

execution is EVERYTHING. so many stories fall by the wayside because of poor planning, no matter how interesting the idea is.

 

To be fair, I think you lost all credibility when you referred to Voldemort as "Voldy."

Now I just see a drivelling idiot. You can turn this around, prove me wrong.

 

True, but it gets boring reading the same thing over and over again, especially when it’s a niche pairing like this.
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The fic or my explanations?
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The fic or my explanations

I came here with a question, not to be insulted. If you have criticism of the story, go ahead and post it - I don’t mind... not my story after all.
At least answer the question though.

If you came here just to throw insults around then fuck off.

Cuntbag

 

Both.

And your attitude.

 

Are those still around? Fuck me, I thought we'd gotten past all that a decade ago.

Don't do that.

It's half a step from Moldyshorts, and you're gonna catch a neverending stream of shit for it.

But I can understand it, because -

You aren't just new to DLP.
You sound like you're new to the Fandom.

You're basically the average DLP member circa 2007 - Tired of the massive amounts of garbage out there, and looking for something better.

My advice? Lurk and Read.

DLP has a massive catalogue of excellent stories for you to enjoy, and a Work By Author section that features the best authors in the entire Fandom. Reading the comments will also help in understanding the general mentality of the forum and why you got the response that you did.

Since you enjoy Harry/Fleur, might I suggest The Half-Blood Romantic from WBA.

In answer to your question - No idea what happened to the story/author. As for finding someone here to adopt it... Unlikely, based on the sound of it. Though I wish you the best of luck.

Edit: Grammar and phrasing to be less of a cunt.

 

To anyone reading through this many years later, "The Lie I've Lived" is still awesome.