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Harry Potter and the International Triwizard Tournament by Salient Causality - M

Discussion in 'Trash Bin' started by Skeletaure, Dec 27, 2018.

  1. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    Title: Harry Potter and the International Triwizard Tournament
    Author: Salient Causality
    Rating: M
    Genre: Drama/Romance
    Status: In-Progress
    Library Category: General
    Pairings: Probably Harry/Fleur
    Summary: A disillusioned Harry Potter gets ready to take on a Triwizard Tournament that captures international attention. He finds a new home, mentor, friends, allies and works to become his own man. Follow Harry as he dives into international waters and finds out if he is a shark or a minnow. Rated M in case something rated M is added in the future.
    Link: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13140418/1/Harry-Potter-and-the-International-Triwizard-Tournament

    The first fic in a while that I have read in full, though it's very much an Almost Recommended item, not full Library. The secondary cast (i.e. Hogwarts students and teachers) are all pretty cartoonishly depicted. But that's pretty much an unavoidable part of reading any fanfic these days.

    Here's the review I posted on FF.Net:

     
  2. Donimo

    Donimo Auror

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    This is awful. I'd have given up after the first paragraph if I'd just found this on my own. I'll keep pushing on and see how long it takes Harry to make basilisk skin armor.

     
    Last edited: Dec 29, 2018
  3. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  4. Rehio

    Rehio Bad Dragon ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    There is just an incredible amount of "info dump" in this fic. It feels like I'm reading a low-tier textbook that doesn't actually apply to anything in my life.
     
  5. AgentSatan

    AgentSatan Third Year

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    The whole premise is flawed as the story begins with Harry wondering why everyone hates him, and angsting about how hogwarts is fickle. It’s been done at least ten thousand times by now, and it seems like an average angst fic. That’s leaving out the part where Harry muses about how Dumbledore seems to know everything. The opening chapter is a tired cliche that we have all read before. Ron is totally out of character, and tells Dean about how much of a git Harry is. Unfortunately for the author, JKR made a point of saying in GoF that Ron didn’t help Harry but didn’t disparage him either. Ron just thought Harry was hiding something from him, and is basically having a fight with him over the apparent deception. However the author decides to have the Evil!Ron take, and even has Ron break into Harry’s trunk! That’s just one example; the story treats every student and teacher as evil. This can’t even be called a guilty pleasure it’s so bad.
    Then there’s the whole Harry builds a secret lair in the chamber of secrets, but wait there’s more. Salazar left a letter to his descendant, and it turns out that Salazar was a good guy after all and demonized by history. Admittedly, the letter does introduce an interesting system of magic at the end, but that merit is completely overshadowed for the fact that a couple paragraphs later proffesor Sprout is being compared to Snape and the hufflepuffs are sabotaging Harry in herbology. Indeed, Harry even remarks on how everyone’s faces are full of hate for him, and there is not one bit of sadness. Also, Mcgonagall hands out detention to Harry for the flimsiest of excuses; he zoned out in classs for a minute or two. As I was reading the fic I was thinking that it had hit on every cliche but Manipulative!Dumbles, but later Harry even realizes that not only is Dumbledore evil but Remus is also conspiring with him. He even goes on to remark on how Sirius must be evil, and that the entire world is out to get him. He also removed himself from hogwarts. At that point I gave up hope and stopped reading it.
    Basically, I think this fic could be interchanged with other fics that do the exact same cliches. It’s been done again and again. To be honest it’s terrible. It’s Angsty!Harry at it’s worst; I don’t recommend reading it.
     
  6. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  7. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  8. Donimo

    Donimo Auror

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    I finally finished reading this today. I have to say its impressively bad. Really there is absolutely nothing redeemable about this story at all.
     
  9. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  10. Sowaka

    Sowaka Second Year

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    This kind of story can be enjoyable when the author goes way over the top in a ridiculous way, be it intentional as a parody or unintentional because he lacks any sort of good sense. In this case the author doesn't go far enough and as the result it just feels dry, mechanical, clinical, almost joyless.

    Maybe he'll hit the tone right in the next chapter when Harry comes back to Hogwarts for the Yule Ball with his new prize girlfriend.
     
  11. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  12. Snapdragon

    Snapdragon Banned

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    You might not enjoy the main plot of the story or the tropes but I can't really see how this story is "not redeemable". I thought it was reasonably well written and I've seen far worse stories with similar tropes.

    I surely didn't ask to read about him joining ballet sessions or the attached romance but then I can't claim I've ever read a "better" Harry-joining-ballet session either:)

    I actually liked the teacher relationship the writer developed there and who can claim to not have enjoyed Griselda Marchbanks' appearance? A quirky character which I hope isn't just a backdrop from now on.

    People checking this out should expect to get a lot stale tropes well packaged. Nothing more, nothing less.

    Almost Recommendable/Guilty pleasure. A matter of taste.
     
  13. Skeletaure

    Skeletaure Magical Core Enthusiast ~ Prestige ~ DLP Supporter

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    I've actually enjoyed the "preparation for the Yule Ball" sequence. It's a bit too long (a couple of chapters are entirely filler) while simultaneously rushed (Harry's closeness with Natalia develops far too fast) but nonetheless it's a relatively original direction and who doesn't love a "turn up at the ball and impress everyone with the hot chick on your arm" trope?
     
  14. Donimo

    Donimo Auror

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    This is true. I suppose I was too hard on the fic, I just didn't realize it was about Harry living in a cave and learning to dance.
     
  15. Nicovi

    Nicovi Fourth Year

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    I share the pro/cons of the above, no need for me to get repetitive. With just a few tweaks here and there the reading experience would improve significantly.

    Though someone dropped the ball regarding the most recent chapter. It has too many issues that made it through (there is a beta).
    - "You need to be back in the antechamber in one minute" followed by "The two made it back, with two minutes to spare"
    - "One might dare to say her reaction hid the opposite."
    - "Harry was the last champion in the room. Neither Fleur nor Viktor's dates seemed to be there yet." followed by "She noticed Cedric and his date Cho Chang enter".
    etc..
    That being said, I rather have the story with all its flaws than no story at all
     
  16. KaiDASH

    KaiDASH Auror DLP Supporter

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    I rather like this story. The biggest flaw is that the author seems to show no restraint in what he writes about, leading to gigantic 'tell' segments that are honestly a bore, along with scenes or sections that are just way too long. He needs a beta reader too, sometimes the word choices are weird or wrong (here/hear, they're/their etc) and there's some immediate continunity issues like illya points out.

    If you can forgive that and don't mind this type of story it's probably a 3/5 as it's rather fun, except when it isn't.
     
  17. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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  18. Crownworthy

    Crownworthy Banned

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    This story starts off rather weakly. The initial premise is overdone and the first chapter descends into the sort of mindless Ron bashing which is so prevalent in the fandom. Training in the Chamber of Secrets is a cliche I haven’t seen anybody attempt in a couple of years.

    I suspect the reason is twofold. First, the setting limits the possibility for character interaction and plot. Secondly, training scenes are a drag to read. The first half of this story is testament to both. I suppose the author tries to spice it up by way of dry magical theory and rituals, but that stuff seldom works for me. I suppose that’s more of a personal preference, though.

    The First Task was really anticlimactic, though I suppose I need to credit the author with a novel idea. The cloying cuteness of the miniature dragon is annoying as all hell. I suppose it panders to certain elements of the fandom, but I am not amused.

    Surprisingly, the story has taken a significant upturn in the later stages. Harry’s dealings with the press and the ministry were far more nuanced than I expected from a story of this general caliber. The romance, while a bit fluffy, isn’t all that bad either, though the author should be careful so he doesn’t make Natalia too much of a Mary Sue.

    While significantly better than the first half, the second half still had some problems. Others have talked about the sloppy editing of spelling mistakes and continuity errors, and I agree with the criticism that has been leveled, but the biggest turnoff for me was the characterization of Dumbledore. I see the author has Clel in the list of their favourite authors, and this doesn’t surprise me. Dumbledore in this story plays to the Clel archetype of coming up with really stupid ideas for manipulating an “Intelligent!Harry” who deals with them as though they were the temper tantrums of a child. Basically it comes down to Dumbledore throwing his weight around without any subtlety or political savvy.

    All in all, though, the story became quite entertaining after the first couple of chapters, and it definitely belongs in the upper reaches of Almost Recommended. 3/5.
     
  19. GeneralLee01

    GeneralLee01 Squib

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    Anybody going into this story should be aware that the author said (either in his AN or a response to my review) that he likes writing info dumps.

    The story itself is held back by bashing and cliches, but not so much that I want to quite reading. He does a decent job of keeping Harry human, but fails with almost every other character. To be fair, only 3 characters, including Harry, have gotten significant screen time. With info dumps inflating word count, and Harry being stuck in the chamber, it could be another 10 chapters/100,000 words till anybody outside those 3 characters gets any character development.

    I'd still give it a 2.5/5 due to it being readable. I can't find any other not-bad HP fanfiction that I haven't read.
     
  20. Xion

    Xion Robot Overlord Admin

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