Deathly Hallows will be 784 pages long. Second largest. News article here.

Interesting -- will this story be 99% action to explain all the loose-ends, conceived plot holes or will this be 99% bullshit limpdicking around for Horcruxes/Gin-Gin's gina?

 

Joy - 784 pages that reads like a bad H/G Redeemed!Snape fanfic. Its too bad I have to buy a copy just to see how else she is going to trash the storyline before it ends =[

 

I don't plan on buying it at all.. I figure that after release, I will check the forums and decide whether or not I'll buy it based on what is posted here... I'll be very very surprised if it isn't

Hoping for anything else after HBP seems moot at this point..

 

I will buy it and read it, but only because:
1. I want to have the complete set of first printings.
2. I DO want to find out what happens (no matter how crappy it is).
3. I can get it for 5 bucks.

 

I'll just download the .pdf from eMule, like I did with all the others.

 

Poor trees. At least Don Quixhote was a good book for all the trees it killed.

This will suck. And it will be long too.

 

Wow, 784 magical pages. Based on my extensive (i.e., lazy) research of fanfiction, I think I have a pretty good idea of exactly how things will play out:

200 pages: Harry brooding
70 pages: Ron furrowing brow in confusion
100 pages: Hermione correcting someone
6 pages: Searching for, and finding all Horcruxes
150 pages: Snape telling Harry he's an idiot, and of COURSE he was good all along.
1 page: Snape trying to kill Harry, and accidentally hitting Draco instead.
20 pages: Voldemort sending Harry some quite disturbing dreams, including one very inappropriate one about Bellatrix raping the deceased body of Dumbledore.
5 pages: Dumbledore reveals he's been an Inferi this whole time.
100 pages: Ginny tries to convince Harry to take her back nearly every day for fifteen weeks, only to realize it wasn't Harry, but a photograph of him taken by Colin Creevey.
45 pages: Several unimportant people are killed, and receive only a mention.
5 pages: Voldemort and Harry face off, and Tom tries to convince Harry he is Harry's father. Harry, who never saw Star Wars, doesn't get the reference.
50 pages: Ron and Hermione reveal that they've been dating behind Harry's back for years. Harry reveals that he doesn't care, and do you realize Voldemort is still trying to attack me right now?
4 pages: Ginny explains to Harry her diabolical love potion plan, and kills herself in a fit of self-hatred. Harry, watching a surprising amount of Bill & Fleur in Dumbledore's Penseive, misses the whole thing.
20 pages: Harry spends a chapter looking for Ginny, but winds up giving up after deciding to have a butterbeer instead.
30 pages: Harry and Voldemort face off, and Harry reveals he has gone back in time, and is actually VOLDEMORT's father. Tom is shocked by this, and hugs Harry, who was actually joking.
1 page: Harry wakes up, and realizes it was all a dream. Wait, what?
= Total: 787 pages.

Wait, that doesn't add up right - what did I miss here? Ah hell, forget it.

-J

 

I'm Zaphod Beeblebrox, my father was Zaphod Beeblebrox the Second, my grandfather was Zaphod Beeblebrox the Third..."

"What?"

"There was an accident with a contraceptive and a time machine." Good old Doug, you never fail to provide me with entertainment.

 

And wakes up in his bedroom at the Dursleys. I bet there will be a collective cry of shock and anger heard around the world if that happens.

 

Hmm.. I like it.. I imagine it would be quite a relief to wake up in his old cupboard.. I mean seriously.. Would you rather get the shit kicked out of you by Dudley everyday? Or be forced to spend time doing the naughty with the Gin-Gin everyday? I would take the ass-whoopings thankyouverymuch

 

Its not that long of a book. A days read most likely. But yes it will be so full of shit it will be hard esspecially when I could be reading some Fan Fiction..


And yes the cupboard would be halarious. But alas its a childrens book so it wont happen.

 

Someone should definitely do a remake of Harry Potter that imitates the way Doug would write it. A good author though.

That said, back to the topic at hand: You know all y'all are gonna cry when Harry dies at the end. Think of all the fanfiction that would be destroyed by it? It'll be sixth year remakes for the rest of eternity!

Cringe.

 

There was a time when 784 pages would be to short and only take me about a day to read. Now, however, this will probably take me somewhere around a week to read, hell i don't even know when the damn book is coming out.

 

July 21st, heh, my birthday.

It will probably take me a few days to read it. I haven't been able to sit down and read a whole Harry Potter book in one sitting since Sorcerer's Stone. Way to many boring parts that cause me to get up and move around, plus sickening and unbelievable parts as well.

 

Really should have been the 7th not the 21st. I mean come on, 7/7/07 for the 7th book with over 700 pages... It's meant to be, although 21 is three 7's...

 

If this page count was announced during the wait for Ootp, I would have been damn excited now that excitement is nowhere to be found.
I have lost my interest in JK's version Harry Potter.
However, this doesn't mean that I won't wait in line to buy the book on the 21st.

 

Okay, well I'm going to be the happy little fangirl of the crowd. I've pre-ordered the book on Amazon and I'll probably read it over three times, and enjoy every read even more than the last.

Don't mind me while you all bitch about JKR... I'm still in my bubble of naïveté (yay for AZERTY keyboards; who else can get the accents right?).