I know what you mean. My roommates were staring at me like I was crazy for a week after reading this.

 

I get what you mean to lol, I was laughing my ass of and my dad kept asking me why was I laughing, he kept asking me repeatly as I kept laughing theough the story, lol, dad kept giving me these looks. I cant wait for the next chapter.

 

Umm..........Wow.

 

Pretty good...some of it became a little confusing at some parts, but really good. I give this a 4.5/5...nonjon is a master of comedy.

 

Hey nonjon, just so you know:

TOTALLY LOVE YOUR WORK!

 

New chapter was.... highly epic. I got three knocks on my door asking if I was okay and if I was choking.

 

OMG this is the best story i have ever read.

Great Chapter. What did they get, crabs?

 

This chapter made me laugh so hard it hurts now

 

Ahaa, this was an awesome chapter.

 

Excellent update, as always. I did a spit-take at one point, and actually laughed a few times on this one. Nonjon, you are now one of my favorite authors of all time lol

 

I believe you need a "the" in front of magic.

Ok I'm not sure about this but when he says "The only identifiable characteristic is these" shouldn't the "is" be a "are"?


A very ammusing chapter as always even though nothing really happened. A food fight and a after party. Its like we get the foreplay and the snuggling afterwards with out the sex.

One thing that occured to me as I was re reading a few of the chapters was how Dumbledore said he could no longer Father children or fall in love since he defeated Grindewald. Not having kids is easy to understand. Fate just kicked him in the nuts, but how can you not fall in love?

Love is such a broad word. The love between friends, lovers, family, possesions. So he doesn't love anyone? He thinks of all his closest friends like I do a Mars bar? He can really really like them but cant make that final step to love.

I also hope he get to see a reapperance of Ginny. Preferably floating in on Jimmy and Gin.

Also I'm kinda suprised David AKA Tom Riddle AKA the Diary AKA That Fucker AKA Mr Riddlebottom went for the "Lucky shot" story. I thought he would have wanted as much prestige as possible. His future plans would be a lot easier if people knew he kicked Voldemort ass five ways from Sunday rather than got lucky.

Its like the difference between Dumbledore and Harry. Dumbledore is famous respected and feared. He made a name for himself and everone knows he can back it up.

Harry is like Paris Hilton. Famous due to a combination of his name and his perents work. Even the wizarding public knows it. In OOTP Harry was called a glory seeking whore trying to cash in on his fame.

David would certinly want the more powerful option of kicking ass rather than a lucky shot. Sure it would be harder to convince people of but the mutilated body of Voldemort should help that along.

Well after this rambling review I give your story which is winding down a 4.6 out of 5. It had a few slow bits in and bits that while funny I feel didnt add much to it and would have been better to skip for more story line related affairs (the Hermione chapter).

 

Once again a fantastic chapter.

The scene with Tonks as a centaur was golden, I'm still giggling like a fangirl as I write this.

But alas all good things must come to an end, it feels like everything is done and nearing completion. I hope that I'm wrong.


Edit: Yay for 100th post.

 

The last chapter seemed a bit off to me, maybe a bit rushed?

I would've preferred a chapter or section on Harry's involvement and the actual defeat of Voldemort, rather than just skipping ahead to the 'family' dinner which seemed a bit odd.

Also, was I the only one who had forgotten why on earth Lily, Tonks and Sarah were crying and hugging Harry at first? Then came the realisation, the pensieve.

It just seems like you want to tie the story up and move onto other things, thus skipped time through a bit of these last chapters, more interaction with 'That Fucker' would've been great as Riddle!Neville was an incredible plot device.

I'm sad the story is coming to a close, it's quality is superb making it basically the only story I read now days. I suggest moar Firefly, not a crossover this time?

 

I agree on the rushed thing. I felt I missed out on quite a lot in this chapter. You as the author may know everything that goes on in your stories universe but we the reader don't. Thus having such a major plot moment totally glossed over is annoying.

 

Thanks TEAoS. I added the missing "the" and I wasn't sure on whether it was "The only characteristic is/are these" so I made it easy and changed it to "The only characteristic is one of these."

And yeah, I knew this would be different for people as the fic's always been about Harry and Sirius' relationship, not the war with Voldemort. And I had the opportunity for an angstless Harry without the whining of a final battle (which also inevitably knocks him out and he misses the parties). I've no doubt, if people read this hoping for an action/adventure story they'd feel cheated by the offscreen "final" battle.

The short answer about Dumbledore, since it's not going to come up in the fic is the same clarification used in boyfriend/girlfriend dumpings worldwide. He can love someone, he just can't be in love with them. Caring deeply and having great affection for others? Fine. But to find that one special someone, to feel fulfillment in that you are their only one, etc... Tough break old man.

As for David Riddlebottom, he'll be making his name. But if it comes too easy, there might be backlash that he didn't go after the Dark Lord sooner. The illusion of power comes from decades of making the impressive look effortless. But the "lucky shot" Kingsley called it isn't even necessarily an accurate assessment, nor a reflection of how the papers will report it. They've got a new hero to enshrine.

And yes, Tom has a fifty year plan.

Agreed on the rambling. This story didn't need to be 230K+ words long. I just have a bad habit of pandering to people reading the WIP chapters as they come, which is a different sort of audience than those reading the finished story from start to end. Oh well. Still learning more on how to make my writing better with each finished fic. Thanks for the comments.

___________________
EDITED TO ADD:

For people unclear, this has all happened rather fast and abruptly.

I don't have my notes open here, but I think it's like

Day 1: Harry and Sirius announce auction
Day 3: Potters attacked, Harry blurts out to Snape and then fluffy meeting
Day 4: The auction, meet David Monroe
Day 7 or so: First time Harry sees Potters again and finds out Tom's plans came together quicker than expected. Throws a party that night.

The last chapter is going to be Day 9 or 10, and will start with Harry and Tom covering a few of the details you want to hear, while standing in front of the Voldie-cage. We'll definitely see a bit more of this Tom and hear a bit more from Albus before I turn that "WIP" in the summary into a "COMPLETE".

It should feel like it's winding down, because it is, but that doesn't mean you've read it all yet.

 

The lenght wasnt a problem at all in my opinion. I have read this story cover to cover 4 or 5 times and still get amusement out of it ever time. It was that sometimes while reading areas I'd just kind of scroll down quickly getting to the good bits. in total I'd say even on the 4th reading I wasnt skipping anymore than 15-20%.

The few bits I did miss need not be cut so much as just replaced. I personally would have liked to see them fuck the government around a bit more. Do something like Filabuster a few pureblood bills.

The really pointless chapters like the Hermione chapter is something that really belongs in a Omake. That entire chapter can be cut out and it doesnt matter at the least to the over all story.

 

I disagree. Usually in AU when you don't talk about the golden trio, you still want to know what happened to them.

Great chapter for a great story. Cheers.

 

I think that I'm the only one that noticed that Harry is still being called Lord Black and not Lord Slytherin. Is there a reason for that?

 

No one knows yet. Its all very hush hush