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Dead Link Sun Kissed Jinchūriki: Nibi no Nekomata by J3kk - M

Discussion in 'Almost Recommended' started by Rahkesh Asmodaeus, Nov 13, 2008.

3/5, 2 votes
  1. Rahkesh Asmodaeus

    Rahkesh Asmodaeus THUNDAH Bawd Admin DLP Supporter

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    Nov 13, 2008 #1
    Title: Sun Kissed Jinchūriki: Nibi no Nekomata
    Author: J3kk
    Rating: M
    Summary: Naruto flees from a bloody scene when it gets to be too much for him. With Haku and Sasuke believed to be dead, Naruto flees in order to clear his head. He runs into a young woman from Cloud, a woman named Nii Yugito, claiming to be the Nibi no Nekomata, the Two-Tailed Demon Cat. What will Naruto do now that he’s back in Konoha with her?
    Link: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3795284/1/Sun_Kissed_Jinchuuriki_Nibi_no_Nekomata


    Awesome story. Naruto/Yugito pairing, if I recall correctly.


    Checked by Minion, February 11, 2015
    Dead link is dead. If you know where to find another copy of the story, please inform the library staff.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 11, 2015
  2. Tofferson

    Tofferson First Year

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    Nov 15, 2008 #2
    I've clicked on the link for this story more times then I care to count only to end up closing it since Nii Yugito is way to close to Naruto/OC for my tastes. But, seeing it here on DLP and having a lack of anything else to really read at the moment, I might give it a go now. I shall leave a review after I do so.
     
  3. Howdy

    Howdy Dark Lord

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    Nov 15, 2008 #3
    It's hard to say if a character is OC when she's only had panel space in two chapters and has about five lines.

    Most of the relevant information we have on her (i.e. her status in Cloud) wasn't revealed until a few months ago - long after this story had begun to be written.

    There are very few named characters in the story that have less on panel exposition than Yugito.


    I like this story so far, though it still hasn't pushed through the Chuunin Exam yet (I think) and I'm always a bit thrown off by the appearance of ghosts and even more prophecies in the story.
     
  4. Chime

    Chime Dark Lord

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    Nov 16, 2008 #4
    I disagree. The major problem (or maybe it's boon) is that only Naruto, Sakura, Sasuke, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Tsunade have any definable character. If you look at panel time or lines spoken by characters you'll notice that probably Shikamaru is the only secondary character besides the above that provides and significant contribution to the story.

    Hinata, Neji, Tenten, Ino, Chouji, etc. every single other Naruto character probably has about 1-2 pages (ie >1000-2000 words) of dialogue total, or less, accredited to their character. It's very hard to write Naruto characters "canonically" since we hardly know anything about anyone.

    As for this story:

    edit: Oops! I've been reading one story and posting in the wrong thread :/ guess I'll have to come back to this and leave a review. *bonk
     
    Last edited: Nov 16, 2008
  5. Janus

    Janus Groundskeeper

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    Nov 16, 2008 #5

    THIS!!! This conversation needs its own thread, though I don't know if we're to put anything but fics in this subforum.

    Anyway.

    I did a reread of the manga a few months back, and you would be astonished at how much of what we accept as canon plot actually isn't in canon. By some completely fucking odd process, the fanfiction community itself has agreed on a ridiculous number of "facts" about the plot that aren't at all.

    I had examples at the time, but I don't remember them at the moment. The absolutely beautiful uppercut Stephens put Anjos down with at UFC 91 seems to occupy that spot of my brain.
     
  6. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

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    Nov 17, 2008 #6
    Which facts when you remember them? I know everyone seems to think Naruto only eats ramen when in the very first chapter, Naruto eats toast and drinks milk.

    I hate that fucking shit so damn much.
    ...and Lesnar becoming champion, looooooool!

    Edit: Also, I'll try this story and review sometime.
     
  7. Janus

    Janus Groundskeeper

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    Nov 17, 2008 #7
    T_T Must you mention that?

    Ah, well, that was a pretty awesome knockout punch too.

    Stiil, I'll be rooting for his opponent at the undisputed status match.

    -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

    We had this massive aim conversation about it back near the beginning of the summer and for the life of me I can't find the transcript. If a topic on characterization or some such started here I'd probably have to go back and reread again.

    The Hyuuga clan was a big one if I remember correctly. Its composition as well as the disposition of Hiashi and Hanabi.

    The village's treatment of Naruto was another one, as was the ramen bit.

    After that it was just little things that seemed to pop up in 90% of fanfics that we couldn't find anywhere in canon.
     
  8. Dark Syaoran

    Dark Syaoran No. 4 Admin

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    Nov 24, 2008 #8
    Well, I tried reading this and I have to say, either my standards are ridiculous or this story is just shit.

    Not the worst thing I've read, of course, but almost instantly, Yugito's personality annoys the shit out of me. It wasn't too bad, but definitely not how I see her. Naruto's naivety is another thing that nearly sends me into a rage.

    Yeah, he isn't too bright in canon and he is ignorant about a lot of things. But the level of naivety shown, I thought, was a bit much. Maybe he gets better, but that rankled me quite a bit.

    Then the shit in the Sandaime's office was about as much as I could take. The conversation was just awkward as shit. I cringed when I saw that they were just going to walk in and ask if she could join the village. This happens in a lot of other stories. I kinda wish they'd have this part happen 'off screen', almost no exceptions, unless this ninja has something very valuable to offer and are able to come to some sort of realistic deal.

    Like important information or something, not just another pair of hands, no matter how skilled. I guess being a container for the two-tails gives her hands a little more value.

    Anyway... I didn't like this. Like most stories, it probably gets a lot better as the chapters continue but if the start scares me away, I'm not going to get to those latter chapters.