Proportion is a relative term... in this case at least.

Anyway, I personally like this story. No, I don't know where the story is going or exactly what the fuck is going on, but I'm willing to endure that because the story is that good. I give it a 5/5 because I like the grittiness of it, and the fact that Harry can't do amazing wandless magic overnight.

I don't know if I've said this before, but in the event of a thirty plus chapter story, we don't need plot in the ninth chapter. We need plot build-up. Most of our great denizens are here because of Harry Potter, correct? Neither one of those books featured anything above barely-relevant-to-the-plot in the first nine chapters, if that.

 

This precise criticism and nitpickiness, if you want to call it that, is what I would think most authors would want.

A lot of dumbfucks like lightwater make this mistake with DLP. Shoddy work gets insults without concrit, because who cares? You can’t write, someone might be generous but otherwise, get the fuck out. A wonderful story is in the making, its potential is recognized, and people are being attentive as a result.

MacGyver!Harry ftw.

 

Most of the reason why I said what I did was because of the above.

But see, you just said so yourself: that it is your personal preference; you have no claim to say what RustyRed's is. I'm not saying that I do either, but I think its preemptive to assume the same for her.

Also, I'd ask you to refrain from sounding so decidedly /b/ when telling someone to GTFO.

Again, assuming what other people want. All I'm saying is that the community can be a little less forward and unforgiving to an author coming to discuss his/her story with them. The fact that this sort of discussion between author and reader can happen is very nice, and I don't think you guys should (if inadvertently) scare away the authors.

 

We can assume all we fucking want. It's the author who should have to adapt to the community, not the other way round. Most know this when they sign up. Those that don't, well, don't last long, like I expect you would.

Giving critical and sometimes harsh reviews and opinions is the way things work here at DLP, and the authors who stay around appreciate this. If you don't like it, you can stick to your FFN standard one-line reviews or head to other communities. Just don't expect DLP to mould itself to your tastes.

 

Alright I got it. Can't beat 'em; join 'em.

 

You come here to start a revolution or something?


Anyways, I find the story to be entertaining so far.

That having been said, I find to be too much rushed action and not enough plot. There are interesting ideas in here, but they seem to get glossed over as the jumping from action to action occurs. Not much has been developed yet despite the number of interesting and original ideas. Whether they are explained and elaborated on will play a big part in how this story turns out.

 

Under no circumstances will you win an argument about how we do things. You do realize this right?


On the story I personally like what has been posted so far. Its different and definitely has my interest. Post more.

 

I just read through it all; very original and well written. Kind of saw the second fake Dumbledore coming a mile away but Harry has always been rather stupid so I suppose its not that unbelievable that he didn't realise.

I particularly enjoyed the fire spirit idea/dialogue and have no complaints about pacing. The foreshadowing about the ship itself seems a bit forced. In the space of 2-3 chapters the idea of the ship is introduced from scratch and immediately Harry finds himself there; I don't think it was strictly necessary to introduce the location before Harry finds himself there.

I think the criticism about a seeming lack of plot isn't really valid. This story is from Harry's point of view exclusively. Harry has no goals particularly at the moment other than a bit of researching so it makes sense that the story just seems to be going from one random event to the next. Until Harry himself actually has a plan of action I don't think you can expect to be able to discern an overall plot arc, especially when this story appears to be embracing the thriller/mystery elements.

In conclusion I'd say very good and one of the most original I've read for a while. 5/5 unless you go and make Harry pregnant or something. 6/5 if you go for a Harry/River Spirit or Harry/Brain pairing

 

Wow dudes and babes, it's been a while huh? I appreciate the support in every form, whether it be hard core or soft P), as long as it's actually telling me something rather than blowing smoke up my ass, hehe.

As far as the story goes, well... I'm afraid I forgot to mention that I was doing nanowrimo (and I swear to god I must have written that note and then erased it or something) so that's been keeping me pretty occupied. Then I had finals and now I'm finally getting some time to actually sit down this break and build up a nice bit of momentum.

So, long story short, no worries--the story is still on the tracks. Keep ya eyes peeled, my friends.


edit: Maro, I'm actually planning to get Harry pregnant BY the river spirit, so...

 

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. I admittedly haven't read the latest chapters, and have honestly forgotten most of this story, but What. The. Fuck.

 

My sarcasm senses are tingling. Mind you they don't have a terribly great record of accuracy on the net for some reason.

 

I sense teh sarcasmz!

Either way, I was just thinking about this fic yesterday, when I was reading the latest chapter of Measure for Measure, wondering what had happened.

Nice to see its back on track, and am looking forward to the next few chapters.

 

Has anyone put up Measure for Measure in the review section yet? I read it last week and it seemed like a pretty decent story so far. I just saw the update, which I am now going to read.

and ttt for Ectomancer update.

 

I love it. Some of the descriptions were a bit odd and didn't seem to flow right, but that was just minor stuff. I like where the story's going, and how it's been going along- moreover, I enjoy that it's not careening into the void at breakneck velocity- it's not methodically slow- but it's moving at a speed that lets you enjoy the ride.

I'll admit, the part where Harry ends up on the ship was a bit... dry. Everything else has wonderful descriptions, but that part just feels a bit awkward.

The pitfight was fun enough, and the river spirit was hillarious. Especially the River Spirit/Thames Spirit interaction near the end there.

In any case, I suspect many things for this story- there are innumerable chekov's guns floating around that I can't wait to see get picked up again.


And anyways- the story makes me laugh. That's the most I can ask from any story- if it's not entertaining, then it doesn't matter how well written the piece is.


4.5/5- that'll go to a 5/5 if the updates continue to pour in

 

Quite a good chapter, this one. I'd thought this fic was all but abandoned too so it was a pleasant surprise to see it in my update folder.

More of a filler than anything I guess, but it's set the groundwork for several plot points and made me just that bit more curious about the blood wand and the Other Side.